Oh Miss West

Attention Fellow Knitting Bloggers and Followers

2011-12-07T09:31:00.001-08:00

I've gotten a lot of comments about my blog lately. Not bad comments, mind you- this is in no way a complaint topic. But I've had a lot of people telling me they can't access my blog because of the adult content advisory, or that they see my blog listed in my Rav profile, but don't look because of the advisory.

See, the thing here is that when this blog started, it was originally a book review/funny life story site. And the books I read tend to be very, very adult. Also, my life stories-which frequently include politics and religion- have a tendency to make me use a lot of four letter words. Which I in no way apologise for, and will probably not quit using anytime while I'm, you know, still breathing. But due to the content, this blog must have a content advisory.

I've also noticed that I tend to avoid certain topics I want to post on because they don't blend with the others. For example, I tend to avoid talk of my religion (still Wiccan here), or I'm not posting book reviews, or what have you. So I've decided on a solution:

Two blogs! Yes, that's right. Should you choose, you can now enjoy me twice as much- like a double scotch on the rocks. My new blog, http://www.thepointandlaughchronicles.blogspot.com/, will focus on my knitting and other craft-related projects, and will be rated PG-13 and under, thus avoiding the content advisory. OhMissWest will return to its original use of reviews and the like. OhMissWest will most likely not be updated as often, but I won't neglect it in it's entirety. And likewise, I can't promise the occasion school story will not make it's way onto The Point and Laugh Chronicles, but I will most definitely try to limit that.

It will take me a few days to get things changed over (I have a math final this week), but I will get it done. Just bear with me. Also, a note to my fellow bloggers- I will be changing which "name" I follow you under, so I can keep better track of your sites.

Happy Holidays,
Miss West/Josie.

How I Got Started

2011-11-30T15:05:00.001-08:00

This past month has been the two year anniversary of my big obsession, aka knitting. And the question I get asked most often is "how did you get started". So I figured I'd share this little tale with you all. So click the "read more" button below, and I'll tell you all about my friend Barb, who is the reason I learned how to knit.

Barb and I met under some kind of crappy circumstances. It was back in April(ish) of '09, and we were sitting in the waiting room at the Mayo Clinic Hospital. See, her husband and my mom were both having surgery on the same day. We sat near each other in silence for quite a while; with her knitting quietly away, and me reading a book. But then the musical guests downstairs (yeah, Mayo has live music!) started playing a Henry Mancini medley, and we just started talking about it (I'm a big fan of Hank). It was a tuba and flute duo, in case you were interested, and it was quite lovely.

Anyways, Barb and I started talking, and I put away my book and she put away her knitting, and we just kind of hit it off. I was fascinated by her knitting, and asked her lots of questions about it, which she answered very patiently. Finally, her my mom was out of surgery, so I got to go check on her and take her home. Barb asked for my email before I left, and we sort of kept in touch, and I kept thinking of her knitting. Then something really funny happened.

Fast forward to that August: once again, I'm in the waiting room at Mayo- this time, my mom's having her leg amputated. She's definitely inpatient, so I'm just staying until the surgery is over. I'm sitting there with a book, exhausted 'cause it was gods-awful early in the morning, wishing I had something as soothing as that knitting had looked. I had run into some friends of my mom's from back when she worked- another friend of theirs was also having surgery. I had just finished talking to them when I heard someone say my name from behind me, in a rather questioning manner: It was Barb. It turns out her husband was again having surgery on the same day my mom was. I had meant to tell her, but had forgotten. And so Barb and I ended up spending the day together again, until her husband's surgery was over. I got to ask her about her knitting again, although she wasn't actually knitting that time. She admitted to me that it was a great way to pass time and keep calm. This time, we also exchanged phone numbers as well (although this is where I have to admit that Barb is much better at keeping contact than I am). But this time, I had a new determination: I was going to try to learn to knit.

In fact, so determined was I that I stopped by a store on my way home, and picked up a cheap set of needles, and an even cheaper skein of yarn. However, there was no "learn to knit" or "Knitting For Dummies" in the store, so I was going to have to go to the library. That got put off for several weeks, until my mom was out of the main hospital, and into a physical therapy hospital that was much closer to home: I was spending waaaay too much time driving back and forth to remember to go to the library. But come November, Mom was home, and I found Edith Eig's "Mother of Purl". It was enough to get me started, although I believe there are better books to teach yourself with. I spent the next two months making lots and lots of garter scarves, although I did get quite creative, and try to make stockinette scarves with borders to help keep them flat (it didn't work, but that wasn't my fault). Then, in February, I had started college, and my polisci teacher told me about Ravelry (she also let me knit in class), and that's where I pretty much fell down the rabbit hole, into the knitting junkie I am today.

So that's the story of how I learned to knit.

Speaking of knitting, I've done a very pretty shawl since I last posted (okay, more than one), but I can't show you, because it's a test knit for a Mystery KAL. If you are interested in a mostly simple lace shawl project (the only "intermediate" skill required is a provisional cast on, which is easy to learn, because I totally just taught myself), then take a look at the information, and consider joining us: it starts January 1st.. It's beautiful and fun.

KnitPicks Contest- and other knitting news

2011-11-11T15:26:00.001-08:00

Hello, knitting compadres. It's been a couple weeks since I posted, and that was mostly to yell at my very bad yarn. But today's is a much more positive post.

First up, for those of you who love KnitPicks yarn as much as I do-they are having a Wish List contest. Chances are if you shop with them, you got the email, but just in case, here are the details. Add a bunch of stuff you want to your wishlist (you must have a registered account with them, but that's free, so no biggie). Then email the wish list to a friend (KnitPicks provides the link), and then share it either on Facebook or a blog- like this one. I'm doing that right here: http://www.knitpicks.com/cfCart/viewWishlist.cfm?wishlistid=94F0D792-E192-9D50-92E524ECE8F4C2EF&media=WLBL. That's my wish list. See how easy? The contest runs through the sixteeth of this month, with the winners being announced on the 17th- so you still have a few days left to get in on it if you are interested. The winners get to choose $50 worth of items from their wish list. So head on over- it's worth the try, right?

Speaking of KnitPicks, in a segment I like to call "Pimpin' My Friends' Patterns", my friend Meg, aka The Witty Knitter, has a seriously adorable kid's pattern for sale over there. It's called the Union Suit, and not only is it adorable, it's modeled by her even-more-adorable-than-the-pattern baby, Loxley. She has a few other patterns there, as well. The woman makes cute baby clothes, I've gotta say. Of course, she has a lot of practice- she has 8 kids (although they are not all little anymore).

In other Pimping news, my friend SK just put out her first pattern e-booklet, Winter Winds, on Ravelry. You will recognise many of the patterns as projects I've knit, and if you've ever been interested in them, this is a great, affordable way to get some of her patterns. Her patterns are very easy, but never boring. I tend to knit multiples- as you will see in the Finished Object post below. So seriously, treat yourself to a great collection of patterns- you know you want to.

And finally, I offer a new installment of Finished Object Friday- with a whole bunch of projects I hadn't gotten around to posting yet (I just checked, and I haven't posted any FO since September 4th!)

First up we have The Tudor Stole by Miriam Felton. I modified the pattern and only did the diamond charts (I didn't like the wavy mesh in the middle). I'm thinking I might do a second one, only much bigger- this one was smaller, in order to wear it to school.

Second up is SK's Sunburst Double Garter shawl, this one in fingering. I'm giving it to Smallfry, as it is much too small for me. I'm going to make one or two in a bulky weight mohair for myself.

Then we have LazyLara by Birgit Freyer, knit in a gorgeous Wollmeise. Once I got the hang of this one stupid stitch, it was quite quick and easy.

Then we have LazyLily, also by Birgit, and also in Wollmeise. The "Lazy" shawls are a series she's done that are designed to knit up quick and easy.

Then we have the three Amphitheater of Forest shawls, which is a new pattern by SK. I love it so much, and I can't seem to quit knitting it. I've made three in under two weeks. The first one- the purple one- is a holiday gift for Smallfry's sister. The second (the green) and the third (the white) are both for me. The white one, which I'm calling "Your Winter" after a song by Sister Hazel, has become my favorite of anything I've ever knit. Smallfry wants to me make a version for her, and I'm thinking of making one for Mama K as well, and then everyone in the family can have one.

The green one has beads, but they are kind of hard to see

The only way to get them to show up was to turn off the flash

I'll have better pictures of this tomorrow, when it's dry and I can wear it against something dark.

Check my Rav page if you want to see.

I also have two WIPs- I'm reknitting my beaded Artemis, and when that gets on my nerves, I'm working on the Lacy Prairie Shawl from the Folk Shawls book (except mine is stockinette). As always, you can find my projects on my Ravelry Page.

Well, that's all for now, folks. School's going well, and I'm ahead in my logic class and nearly finished. Hence the lack of blogging recently. I'll try to do better.

Ungrateful Little *****

2011-10-28T13:12:00.000-07:00

Dear Skein of Tosh Merino Light in Oxblood,

I'm not sure exactly what was going on with you yesterday, but we need to have a little talk about your attitude. Apparently, you were either unaware or just plain uncaring about the difficult day I was already having, before you decided to pull your little stunts. Just to be clear, it was a pretty bad day, and you certainly didn't do a damn thing to help.

I'm not quite sure where exactly this attitude came from- after all, you practically begged me to pull you out and wind you, as soon as you heard me say "Lacy Prairie Shawl". I'm fairly certain I saw you shoving your sister skeins out of your way as you crawled to the top of the drawer. They way you were behaving, you'd think I'd abandoned you like a five year old's teddy bear when that five year old has just gotten a new toy fire truck. It's not as though I've kept you stashed away for years- seriously, you think you've had it bad? Go talk to that skein of Douceur Et Soir that I haven't so much as looked at in two years- ask her how she feels.

I'd like to think I've been pretty good to you. Didn't I take you home that first day I saw you, so you didn't have to keep cheaply displaying your assets like a common streetwalker, hoping to entice someone into spending a little cash on you? Didn't I keep you in your own special stash drawer- you know, the one with lots of room, so you weren't all smushed, and you got to play with others of your kind? Didn't I do all that for you?

So what the hell happened yesterday? All that tangling and fuzzing- and what was up with those weird strings I found on you? It's as though you couldn't wait to deliberately screw up the winding process. Don't think I didn't see you trying to sneak those into the winding mechanism- trust me, I did. And that thing where you kept jumping off the yarn swift in the middle of winding- that was designed to try my patience, wasn't it? You succeeded, by the way.

Although I will admit to being a little impressed with that maneuver you did at the end- you know, the one where you managed to wind yourself around the stabilizing rod whilst simultaneously working yourself between the crossbars of the swift... whew. I'll be honest, I've only seen that kind of flexibility in professional yoga instructors and adult film actresses. But when you left all those loops hanging out once the winding was finished? That was just uncalled for.

But part of being a good knitter/yarn stasher is knowing when to put your foot down- so I'm sorry Oxblood, but you're grounded. You can't come back out to play until you've learned your lesson to wind properly, and be nice to your knitter. Maybe a couple weeks back in the stash drawer will teach you some manners.

Regretfully,
Your Knitting Owner.

In Search Of My Mojo

2011-10-12T21:03:00.000-07:00

First off- let me apologize to all my Blogger friends, for seemingly abandoning your blogs. I promise you all, I have not. I still read. It's just remembering to sign in and comment that I'm having trouble with. Don't believe me? Susie recently went to Paris, and Marushka is working on a scarf in a gorgeous plum colored yarn. See? I do still love you guys.

It's just that I've been suffering from a major case of the blahs. And I do mean major. I haven't felt like myself for a couple months now. D (the Math God) told me last week that I haven't seemed much like myself, either- and I don't imagine I have.

I've literally had zero interest in anything lately. My knitting bored me. The thought of reading bored me. Television and movies bored me. I couldn't decide on anything if I had to make a choice. I was even putting off my homework until the last minute (which is very unlike me). For a few weeks there, I was basically just sitting on the sofa, watching telly I wasn't interested in. In fact, the only thing I was interested in was working out (but one can only do so much of that per day)

So I decided it was time to figure out what was wrong, and turned to my friends for help. They banded together, pitched in, and helped out: whether it was just listening to me and sympathizing, or helping me form a plan to get out of my funk. But I think it was my friend Suzanne who really hit the nail on the head; she thinks I'm suffering from caretaker burnout, and I think she's right.

See, my dad's getting worse again. Which is in one way expected, because his disease is degenerative (it's a neuro disease- they believe Parkinson's, but they aren't quite certain). But in another way, you can't really be prepared, because you don't know when it's going to hit, or how bad the change is going to be. It used to be with him that we knew what kind of day he was doing to have first thing in the morning- if he was alert (as much as he ever is), it was going to be a good day; if he was out of it (worse than normal), then it was going to be a bad day. But in the past few weeks, we've seen evidence that this is no longer the case. He'll now start the day off well, and suddenly be unable to function after a few hours. He'll be fine one minute, then barely able to function the next- literally, in the snap of a finger, he'll go from fine to incoherent. And now he can also barely walk at all.

What this means is that not only is he having more accidents and falls around the house, it means that my mother can no longer take him to doctor appointments (because she's in a wheelchair herself, she's literally unable to get him around in a wheelchair). So not only am I picking him up off the floor at all hours of the day and night, I'm now back to taking him everywhere. On top of being in school, and trying to have a life (that last part's probably a pathetic pipe dream at this point), and all the things I have to do for my mom.

So yeah, I'm feeling pretty burnt out. I also think I'm suffering from the summer blues. You know how you hear stories about people who literally get depressed during winter, because of the lack of sunlight and such? It's like that, only for summer, and because of too much sunlight. I hate summer. It's my least-favorite season. Fall is my favorite, and it takes forever to get here in Phoenix. Oh sure, technically it starts in September, but we don't really get that fall kind of whether here until November. We did have a nice cool down for a few days, where we were able to turn off the a/c and open the windows-and that did help boost my mood a bit-but the temps went back up, and we're supposed to hit 100 degrees again the next couple days (this is where I'd normally insert a comment about how much I fucking hate Phoenix, but I suspect you already know that by now). See, I like it when it's cooler out. I like to open the windows, feel a nice breeze, maybe there's a chill in the air, and I finally get to wear all the pretty shawls I've made. That's what I like- that and even colder. I like it when I get to bring out the sweaters and jeans and tall boots. I don't like triple digit temperatures and tank tops.

So I'm taking the advice of some of my other friends- I'm making a list of things to do that will shake things up a bit. It's not much yet, and I'm still accepting suggestions.

1) Do something with my hair

Several people suggested getting a haircut ('cause that's what we girls like to do), but I just spent two years growing it out, damn it. So I've decided to color it for fall. I'm going with a color called Chocolate Cherry, and it's described as a warmer burgundy brown. Right up my ally.

2) Go to the Art Musuem.

I haven't been in a while (and by a while, I mean close to two years), and I love it there. I need to be making better use of my free time, and doing "me" things.

3) See some friends, particularly Smallfry

I haven't seen Smallfry in six to nine months. I haven't seen Laura in two years. It's ridiculous. They don't live that far away. Smallfry's in the middle of moving house, so it's going to be a couple weeks, but we'll get there.

4) Learn something new

I've decided to teach myself how to quilt. It looks fun, I've always loved them, and I have a crapload of quilting fabric already from when I was learning to sew. So I did a little shopping, got some books from the library, and cleaned out my sewing room- it's all tidy now and ready to go.

5) Learn something new with knitting

Ahh, knitting- my first love. We all know how devoted I am to it. But I took to it pretty quickly, and I'm a fair old hand at lace now. I want a new challege. So I've decided to learn to knit socks. It's only been recently I've wanted to learn to knit socks, and with fall/winter approaching (it will get here, damn it...some day), and with the whole "blah" thing, I decided this was the time to do it. Also, I'm going to have much less knitting time after this semester, and I thought it might be nice to have something really portable to take to school with me.

6) Read more

Books are my oldest friends, and sadly, all too often these days, I put them aside or ignore them for the more immediate satisfaction of knitting. I can't really read while knitting, unless I'm reading on my Kindle, and knitting something really simple. Instead of occasionally curling up with a good book, I find myself curling up with my knitting, watching far too many hours of television in a row. So I've promised myself that I'll read at least one book a week. This week, I'm reading Raven Grimassi's "Old World Witchcraft- Ancient Ways For Modern Days". Which leads me to

7) Spend more time on my personal beliefs/religion

I've been a very bad Wiccan lately. I'm so caught up in my daily grind that I forget to do rituals, and meditate, and those little things we like to call Sabbats. Yeah, I've forgotten the last three. So this is something else I've made a commitment to spend more time on, even if all I do is read a new (to me) book on the subject. I'm thoroughly enjoying Old World Witchcraft, every bit as much as I enjoyed his other book I've read, "Spirit of the Witch".

Okay, so that's all the list I have so far. It's not even ten things- but it's seven more than I had a week ago. I've also done a few little things here and there that I think will help (and have already). First, I'm giving myself days off. Meaning that, providing my homework and such is done, I get to take the day off. My parents aren't allowed to bother me unless it's a true and absolute emergency. I get to do whatever I want for that day. If it means watching all five Fast and Furious movies in one day, or the entire extended edition of LOTR trilogy, then damn it, that's what I'm going to do. Turn on music and play Nancy Drew? Not gonna feel bad about it. That's what I did this past weekend. I gave myself the whole weekend off (not counting picking the old man up off the floor a few times), and I rented a few movies. I also cast on a new project with some yarn I've been saving (Wollmeise, bitches! It's yummy!). I'm stalled at the moment, and waiting for help, but I've actually been enjoying knitting it, which was a relief, because I couldn't bring myself to cast on anything for several weeks. I also told my mother that she needs to get her doctor to write up orders for home wound care, because I'm not going to keep doing it. It's not my job- I'm not a home health nurse, I don't get paid for this, and I shouldn't have to do it. It's covered by her insurance (I called and checked), so there's really no reason I should be doing it. I'm sure there are some nice nurses out there who would appreciate the extra income. I'll be going with her to her next appointment to make sure this is actually done.

So that's what's been going on, and that's the plan to fix it. I'm hoping in a few weeks to be a bit more like my old self again. Oh, and I guess I should add a number 8 to that list...

8) Start posting on my friends' blogs again. :-)

So Far, So Good

2011-09-17T23:16:00.000-07:00

So I'm one month into my semester, and so far, all is well. I've done great on my first three logic quizzes, and my first math test. The only obstacle I've run into now is the research for my logical fallacy paper.

I have to find an article containing a logical fallacy, and it's proving harder than I expected. I'm still digging, but it's very frustrating. I figured that will all the political crap going on, I'd find one in a few hours. It's now been three days. My paper is due next Saturday, so I'm not exactly happy. I know I'll get it done, but probably with a smaller window of time than I was hoping for.

I've been slowly working on some knitting, but I haven't been getting as much done as I usually do. I don't have any new FO to show off this week. I do have some fabulous yarn porn, however.

A lovely woman on Rav named Cheryl has been doing a fundraiser benefiting the victims of the wildfires in Texas. She's been selling her stash, and taking the proceeds to buy much needed supplies- not only for the victims, but also for the firefighters who have been fighting this since the beginning. She's been kind enough to show us what she's been doing with the money. First she bought things like bottled water, gatorade, protein bars and eye drops for the firefighters. Then she started buying gift cards for Home Depot to help aid the cleanup efforts. She's raise over $1400 so far, and any proceeds made through this weekend will go towards the efforts. In case any of my Rav friends reading this are interested, here is her profile, and here is the link to the destash thread on Rav. I bought from her twice, deciding to spend my yarn budget on this, rather than from one of the big online stores (my usual haunts are WEBs and Jimmy Beans). Here's my beautiful, guilt-free yarn:

A skein of Wollmeise (which I never could have gotten at WEBs or JBW)

A gorgeous Madelinetosh Pashmina

A lovely Dream In Color Smooshy

This is a yarn I've never heard of before, called Evermore Studios Dreamland Sock- the color is just amazing, and this picture doesn't do it justice.

Some Malabrigo Sock, in a color I didn't have (you can never go wrong with Mal Sock)

Some Miss Bab's Yet Lace, which will make a lovely scarf

And finally, this lovely sock weight by WildFlower Whimsy:

I'm hoping to be done soon with the projects I'm currently knitting, so I can play with my fabulous new yarns. Sadly, I'm going to have to frog one of them. I'm knitting a LazyLara in pure silk, and the joins keep coming loose. I've ended up with some dropped stitches. I pleaded for help on Rav, in hopes that someone can tell me how to keep my joins from coming apart before I restart it. If no one responds, I'll have to switch to a different yarn. I'm also working on a holiday gift for Tinkerbell (that's Smallfry's sister), and a new variation on SK's double garter shawls for myself. Those should be done by the end of the week, and then I can cast on with one of the new yarns.

Part of the reason I've been behind on my knitting is that I'm losing a couple hours each day due to working out. I've raised my commitment level on losing weight, and it does take time away from knitting. But it will be worth it when I don't have a heart attack in seven to ten years. Not only have I been putting in more time on cardio, but I've started weight training again, and for good measure, calorie counting (although hopefully that part is temporary). I've gained four pounds, and I'm not sure how, but I'm trying not to stress since it's barely been two weeks. I'd blame it on muscle gain, but my measurements haven't changed much, either. I've lost half an inch around my bust, and that's it. Don't get me wrong, I'll take that half inch, but I'm hoping to see better results soon. In order to keep my motivation, I decided to make a bold move: When I hit the clothing sales to replace some of my winter clothes (which I'll need in a couple of months), I ordered everything a size smaller than what I currently wear. I now have one hell of an incentive to keep at this (and hope it doesn't backfire on me).

Oh, and also, I've been trying to read more. And I simply cannot read a book and a chart at the same time. Even I'm not that good (and I can do a hell of a lot whilst reading).

So that's all for now- the laundry is calling, as is my knitting, but I'll try to get back soon.

PS- just for fun, type in all the names of those yarns I've mentioned into a word processing program, and then hit spell check. It's amusing.

Now I Remember Why I Hardly Drink

2011-09-04T15:42:00.000-07:00

So last night, as some of you might know if you read last night's blog post, I hit the vodka. I might have hit the vodka a little too hard, and I woke up feeling like I'd been hit by the vodka truck. It's not an actual hangover, on account of the fact that I drank several glasses of water before I went to sleep. No, it's worse than that. See, when I drink, I can't sleep. I'll doze for maybe two hours, and then I'm up and awake. Unfortunately, I need a lot more sleep than that these days. I don't know when or how it happened, but the closer I get to my 30th birthday (which is in just a few months), I've found that I need at least six hours of sleep a night (which kind of pisses me off, because I'm not old enough for this crap). So now I'm fighting to stay awake, because if I take a nap, I'll screw up my sleep schedule, and the whole miserable experience will start over, minus the fun vodka part. So in an effort to stay awake, I thought I'd come update you all on my knitting.

I had to go back and see what the last project I posted was, as I've been AWOL for about a month now. I didn't mean to be gone so long, but I had a lot of crap to deal with relating to school (they took my loans away- again- and I had to fight to get them back-again), and between that and the start of the semester a couple weeks ago, I got a little sidetracked. I also lost my knitting mojo for a few weeks, due to dealing with the whole financial aid issue. But I found it again, and have been very productive for the last few weeks.

First up, I finished my Bunny Foo Foo shawl:

Then I did a second Alcyone:

Then I did my first Ishbel. I have to admit, I wasn't crazy about it when it was done, but after looking through other projects on Rav, I've come to the conclusion that my gauge was too loose, and that's why it doesn't look as good as it should.

Then I did my second Longing For Robin's Return. I call these shawls Berlin Without Return. It is the project I turn to when I'm trying to deal with E's death (which I'm still largely avoiding doing- because I'm good at that part)

And then I finished my beaded Cambria wrap. I have to say, I love the way it looks with the beads.

And then, in the last couple of days, I whipped up another Double Garter Triangle. I have to say, this is my favorite to date (and I've made like five of these now).

And that's what I've been up to. I didn't bother to link these, on account of the fact that I don't give a rat's ass today. However, if you are for some reason interested in more information, this is the link to my Rav project page. I generally keep good notes and project information.

And that's all for now, folks. I'm too tired to cover anything else. I'd also like to point out that my eyes feel like I got cigarette ash in them (which is unlikely due to the fact that I'm barely smoking these days, so it's probably just because I'm tired). I don't know what the the hell I'm going to do now to stay awake, but apparently it won't involve looking at my computer screen.

A Trip Down Nostalgia Lane

2011-09-04T02:32:00.000-07:00

Every once in a while, I come across something that makes me flashback to my teenage years (don't we all?). Maybe it's a song on the radio, or the smell of something in the air, or something someone says. In this case, it was the power outage we had a few weeks ago (by the way, I'd like to warn you all now that I'm a bit drunk- so if this doesn't make sense, or start to ramble, blame the vodka).
See, when I was teen, I used to sit in the dark, burning candles, just listening to music. This was actually how I passed most of my time. I'd write a lot of poetry while I was at it. But mostly, it was all about the music and candles. The power failure brought this back, as I had to light several candles and my oil lamps to have any light. It was out for three hours, and for three hours, it was like being sixteen again.

I still love doing things like that, only now I feel completely unproductive when I do. I always feel like I should be doing something else with my time, no matter how happy just sitting there makes me. I'm working on getting over that. I mean, my free time is just that, right? Free time. So tonight, I'm experimenting with it. I've got the candles burning, Third Eye Blind playing, and my poetry on my desk (I've been slowly backing it up onto a flash drive anyway). I could go through all my favorite 90's albums by the time I go to bed. The difference this time is that instead of drinking plain diet coke, there's a fair amount of vanilla vodka thrown in.

It's made me remember all the specifics of those days- the music I was listening to, writing each poem, each candle fragrance I loved (or hated). I was listening to A Northern Soul by the Verve when I wrote Bleed part 1 (it was September 26, 1998). I remember Smallfry coming for sleepovers nearly every weekend for a couple of years. We'd put on Oasis, and she'd read my poetry. We'd talk about boys quite a lot. I hated each and everyone one of her boyfriends. I was still in love with The Boy. Ahhh, the nostalgia.

I suppose that's adding to the teenage-trip: my mother brought up The Boy earlier today. I don't think she's ever given up hope that someday we'll be together. She was trying to get me to call him. I don't call him anymore. He wasn't good for me, and I got over him a while ago, and it's much better this way. I didn't like the person I was when he was around. I made a choice not to be that person. But that's these days. Back then he wasn't so bad yet. He was still a pretty sweet boy. He, Smallfry and I were the freakin' Musketeers for a few years there.

This also makes me want to make cookies. Holy Mother Isis, there were these cookies I just love- chocolate crinkles. They're rich, chewy chocolate cookies rolled in powdered sugar. I made some last week- so I can't make any this week. It's part of my eat-less, ass-gets-smaller plan. I wish I'd had one of those when I was 16 and my ass was expanding exponentially.

It's funny the things I associate with my teen years. Not all of them, of course. Third Eye Blind makes perfect sense: the album came out when I was 15. It didn't leave my cd player for two and half years. Among others: Blur, Oasis, Chumbawamba (I still love that album- and yes, I can hear you laughing), the New Radicals- basically, any alternative album that came out in the 90's. But some of the others pre-date those years, in terms of release dates. But I learned about them when I was a teen, so that's what I associate them with: David Bowie, Eric Clapton, Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers, Fleetwood Mac. These are as entwined with the 90's for me as What's The Story Morning Glory? is.

When I hear Semi-Charmed Life, I'm back in my teenage room again. The bunkbeds in along the wall, the desk in the corner, the cd player I got for my 16th birthday on the desk (I still miss that cd player- it was awesome); I can see them all clearly. The desk had wax stains on it from a green candle. The lights on my cd player were green. It was a three disc changer with a dual tape deck. I made a lot of mix tapes on that tape deck. I used to have to put a t-shirt over it at night so I could sleep, the lights glowed so brightly. Ahh, I'm all nostalgic again.

I'm not saying I want to go back and be a teenager again- once was enough, thank you very much. I just wish I had enjoyed it more back then.

In honor of my giant nostalgia trip, I offer up a poem I wrote when I was 17.

The Wild Side

Take a walk on the wild side of life
Get lost on the other side
Falling down a rabbit hole
Wondering how far it goes
Stumble over a looking glass
Fall into a shallow crack
Land hard on your knees
Let the scrapes and bruises be
See a rabbit suddenly appear
Wonder what he's doing here
Follow him to who-knows-where
Getting lost without a care
Follow him to a dragon's lair
A silent scream lost on the air
Running to an unmarked path
Watch the sky turn from blue to black
Crush the flowers beneath your feet
Bite your lip until you bleed
The Cheshire Cat meets the King of Hearts
A revolution is about to start
Running quickly down the lane
Anything to escape the pain
Find another rabbit hole
Never know how far it goes
The wild side's not what it seems
Close your eyes and try to breathe

Yeah, I was cheery kid, wasn't I?

All poetry is copyrighted to me.

Midnight Confessions

2011-08-06T21:28:00.000-07:00

Okay, so it's only 9:05. But midnight has a much better ring to it, let's be honest. And I have a lot on my mind.

So I have a dead ex-boyfriend.

Okay, that was probably a little on the blunt side. But I haven't really mastered the art of delicately stating someone I used to love is dead (if you have, feel free to share). Remember me saying back in March that I was dealing with some stuff I didn't want to talk about? Well, it was Erich. That was right before he died. Let me see if I can summarize our relationship.

We met when I was 17. He was ...ahem... older. Okay, he was 38. In his defense, he had no idea I was so young- he didn't ask, I didn't tell. I was routinely mistaken for being older than I was back then (as opposed to now, when I get carded buying cigarettes). I've never known anyone I've had so much in common with- books, movies, art, poetry... you name it, and we had a shared love for it. Plus, he was German, so he had that fabulously sexy foreigner vibe going on (please try to remember I was 17 when we met). We were together for two years. No one knew, not even Smallfry (keeping that from her was a huge deal- we don't keep things from each other).

Fast forward to the summer of 2001- aka, the end of it all. While we still had much in common, E did find out towards the end how young I was. I never meant to keep it from him- at least, not once I was 18. It honestly and legitimately never came up. And I saw no reason to make it. If you're thinking to yourself that I did that on purpose because I knew he'd be upset, well.. of course I did! Any way, excuses aside, it did eventually come out. And he took it pretty well... at first, and or so I thought. It's hard to say which. One evening, we had a fight, and I went home early. I didn't hear from him for a few days. He didn't return my calls, and there was no answer when I went by his apartment. At the end of the week, he called me. He'd gone back to Germany, two days before. Literally, he up and moved back to Germany. Without a word. I'd like to point out, should you ever need to know this, that it's very poor manners to leave the country without dumping someone first. He also gave no explanations. He was just all, "I've gone back to Berlin. See you in the next one." (that was a sarcastic reference to one of our favorite songs, See You In The Next One, Have A Good Time, by the Verve).

I was devastated, as you might well imagine. I'm pretty sure I didn't get out of bed for two weeks. And that was that. I didn't hear from him for nearly twelve years. Then last Christmas, he called me. He'd gotten my number from a friend he'd kept in contact with over the years. He wanted to talk, to explain, to apologize. I didn't know it for three weeks, but E had stage four cancer. The chemo hadn't worked, and he was done fighting. The last thing on his list was to make amends to me.

So long story short(ish), we started talking, he explained his incredibly stupid reason for leaving me, and we became friends again. He died at the end of March. And I've been avoiding dealing with it. I'm pretty sure it's the reason I spontaneously took summer classes. I'm avoiding. But here I am, with three weeks to myself, and it's getting very difficult to avoid. I'm also really angry with him, because it was a really bullshit reason he left me (due to my young age, he didn't trust me to keep loving him). And it's really, really hard to be angry with a dead man.

I have a feeling this is just the first step in my usual way of coping- alcohol and poetry.

Okay, that's all. There's really no point in this post, other than my own useless ramblings. I'll be back in a bit with knitting updates.

Whoo Hoo (again)!!!

2011-07-30T00:32:00.000-07:00

This time, I finished Psych 101...eight days early. I busted my ass, and was barely human for the last two days, but I got it done. And now I get to relax for a few weeks... providing my mom doesn't end up in the emergency room again- that was not relaxing.

For those wondering what I'm talking about, click the "read more" link..

So Tuesday morning, my mom gashed her head on a bookcase. We were getting ready to go grocery shopping, and she had a little wheelchair incident. See, my mom has two wheelchairs- one for use inside the house, and one for taking out. The one for the house is too big for the lift in our van, but the one for going out is too fast to use indoors; hence, two chairs. She was trying to transfer from the indoor chair to the outdoor chair, and accidentally hit the control stick. This caused the chair to move forward, into the back of my mom's leg, and she lost her balance. Because my mom only has one leg, she can't brace her feet to help correct her balance. Once she loses that balance, she's down. This unfortunately happened in close proximity to our dvd bookcase (made of real wood- very sturdy and solid).

She's fine, by the way. 16 stitches and 6 staples, but no damage. She argued with me about going to the hospital. And I couldn't get her to keep pressure on the heavily-bleeding head wound. I had to call Smallfry and wake her up to get reinforcement (for those of you who don't know, Smallfry is my best friend, who's a nurse, who works in Neuro ICU). She finally relented, especially after the paramedics agreed with me and Smallfry.

So I had a rough couple of days. Which is why I didn't get to my psych homework until Thursday- I was on mom duty.

This is not the only thing that's gone wrong in the last few weeks. My computer got a virus (which is part of why I went so long without blogging); the van needed work; our washing machine broke and it's taken nearly two weeks to get the warranty people to deal with it; I was sick for a few days; and I'm pretty sure there's a few things I missed. But things are slowly turning around: I finished my classes with A's; the car is running smoothly; my computer is home and virus-free; we get a new washing machine delivered tomorrow; I largely feel fine (my standard fibro crap not withstanding). I'm hoping to get to enjoy the next three weeks.

I'm nearly finished with the Lil Bunny Foo Foo Shawl- or as I'm calling it, Rabbit Heart. I only have 18 rounds left, and only half of those are pattern rounds. Which sounds lovely and fast, but there's 720 stitches per round, so even plain knit takes a while. After this, I'll be joining a mini-KAL for the Rock Island shawl, and be starting some of my holiday knitting.

There's more on the knitting/yarn front, but it's getting late, and I'm getting tired, so I'll come back and post later, after I get some sleep.

Whoo Hoo!

2011-07-21T10:31:00.000-07:00

I'm finished with English!

Well, my summer class- I do have a whole nother class that starts in about a month. But I survived English 101, particularly without hunting down any fellow classmates and violating my personal rule of non-violence. The class technically ends today, but I finished all my work on Tuesday- 'cause I'm like that. Now I'm just working to finish up psych, hopefully by the end of next week. I'm a little under the weather right now, so I haven't gotten quite as much done this week as I would like. I managed to read my chapter yesterday and take the weekly quiz, but I had a headache and some nausea, so I don't know how much of it I really remember. I have to do an exam by Saturday. Then I'm trying to do the next two weeks of work in one week- which actually should be pretty easy, as I'm not balancing it with English.

Despite my frustration with some of my fellow classmates, largely I was bored by this class. Everyone was commenting at the end about how much work it was and how tired they all are, and personally, I don't get it. I was literally bored. I got all my homework done in two days per week, no more than three hours per day. That included writing papers. The only exception to that when I had to research for my argument paper, and that's just because there was so much information, I had to go through it a few times to narrow it all down.

I'm trying to get done with psych early so I have some time to work on a couple more complicated knitting projects I want to do. I've done some quick and easy ones this summer-although still very lovely- but I have a couple of more ambitious projects in mind. I did finally finish my Adamas shawl, and I have to admit, I freakin' love it. Once I got the rhythm down, and quit using stitch markers (they only made it more complicated), it just flew off the needles. I can't wait to make more.

I also did a test knit for SK's new design, in two separate sizes: a scarf and a shawl: It's called Pink Coral and Coin Lace, however, neither of mine were pink. The blue is the scarf, the purple is the shawl

Then I did SK's Double Garter Triangle- this is a new version (there are three or four now, and they are all fun). Knit up on bulky mohair (long print stripes), it's super-quick and fun. I finished mine in about ten to fifteen hours. It's a double garter because you literally knit a double row- you knit one row with one ball of yarn, and then rather than turning your work, you slide it back down to the other end of your needles, and knit a second row with a second ball of yarn. It makes for a really fluffy object.

Now I'm working on MMario's Lil Bunny Foo Foo. I'm doing a four-panel square version. It's coming along nicely. I have a feeling it's going to be very large, though. And speaking of very large MMario patterns, I finally made the decision to frog my Moondance 2. It was wrenching; I won't lie. That was a hell of a lot of work, and it was beautiful. But I figure if it's too big to wear, then what's the point? I have to re-hank the yarn, then wash it and dry it, and I'll be able to re-knit shortly. I'm also going to use smaller beads- the ones I used are too large, and hurt when I wore it.

Say buh-bye to Moondance II, albeit temporarily

That's about it for now. I'll try not to be gone so long next time.

Look What I Did!

2011-06-28T18:52:00.000-07:00

So recently, I was asked by several of my friends to make some knitting tutorials related to beading. So I asked them, and some of my Rav friends, for what kind of information they were looking for. After about a month of compiling, I got down to business.

It's taken six days and endless attempts, but I finally have three working tutorials: one that explains just a bit about beads and compares the three methods of placing them, and a two part video on how I choose where to place beads when they are not written into a pattern. The first part uses a chart I made and a stitch dictionary to explain what key things I look for in a pattern. The second I use actual finished objects I've made to do the same thing. My hope is that I covered methods that would help anyone learn- some people are more visual learners, right? This way they can choose. They are all about fifteen minutes each, but I was trying to be thorough (and they did ask me to address things in detail).

So for my friends who asked me to do this in the first place, or anyone else who happens to be curious (maybe you just want to know what I look like), here are the YouTube links:

Comparing the three methods of placing beads

Choosing bead placement part 1

Choosing bead placement part 2

In other knitting news, I finished another one of Romi's Seven Sisters Shawls, number 7: Alcyone. She was a fast and easy knit- literally only took about three days, and used only one skein of Madelinetosh Merino Light (I had a few yards left over, but that was before they dropped their yardage: it was 440, is now 420). Here's a picture of my shawlette- oh, and the colorway is Baltic

I have now started work on my long standing nemesis again: the Adamas shawl. I have attempted this thing four times previously, and they have all failed. Granted, that was early last year, when I was a new knitter. I'm not sure what went wrong. I'm thinking that it was equal parts the fact that I was unfamiliar with top-down triangular knitting and the fact that my needles were most likely too large. Someone once told me when I first started knitting lace that needle size didn't matter- the bigger the needle, the larger the lace, and that it would be fine. This, as it turns out, is not entirely true. There does come a point when you can distort the pattern, and I think perhaps that was part of the problem. I knit everything on a 4.5 or 5.0mm back then (US size 7 or 8)- I had a great fear of smaller needles. I have since learned to embrace them. I'm knitting this one on the recommended 3.5mm (size 5), and it's going much, much better. It's going so well, in fact, that it's hard to believe this is the same pattern that caused me so much frustration a scant 15 months ago (add in the fact that it's a beginner project, and there's extra insult here). I'm taking the precaution of placing lifelines, just to keep from tempting the fates. This is what it looks like, minus the couple of repeats I've finished today:

In school news, while I continue to be frustrated by many of my classmates, I am taking a smug satisfaction in my grades: I got a 96 on my first paper, and a 97 on my second. I started work on my third paper today. Psych is going well, I'm still getting an A. I'm now putting in a bit more work so I can try and finish up early. My English class ends two weeks before my psych class, and I'd like to finish them both at the same time. I want those two extra weeks, I won't lie. If it doesn't happen, it's no big deal, but it's my current goal.

Anyway, I've been having a Marple/Midsomer Murders marathon, and I'm off to get back to it. I was really only taking a break to make dinner (pecan crusted chicken, baby!).

I'm Still Alive

2011-06-17T22:57:00.000-07:00

Just in case any of you were wondering.

First of all, I'd like to offer my deepest, most sincere apologies to by fellow bloggers, whose pages I used to frequent. I know you haven't heard from me in a while, my dears (Susie, Marushka, The Crafty Cripple, The Cranky Otter, among others). It's really quite unintentional.

You see, I was not fully prepared for how much of a giant time-suck my summer classes would be. I knew they would be work- believe me, I knew that. But I was perhaps a little naive about just how much. I am utilizing excellent time management skills, but it's still a lot to do. A single chapter of psych can take up to four hours, between reading and note taking. I do three chapters, two quizzes, and one exam every two weeks.

English is worse. Not because it's hard for me to write papers- it's not. But dealing with this instructor and some of my fellow classmates is a turning out to be a real bitch. For starters, both classes are completely online. So there's a different dynamic than I'm used to. Then, there's a whole bunch of people can't follow simple instructions. Half the people didn't do the required peer reviews correctly, and some of them didn't get them in on time. I should backtrack here...

Our first real writing assignment was an ad analysis. We had to do two discussion boards, with our textbook and our instructor providing the ads. Then we had to do a full paper, using ads of our own choosing. We had to submit our rough drafts to a discussion board for peer reviews. There are specific criteria for the peer reviews, and a lot of people didn't seem to be able to follow it. They were also due by Tuesday, so we could all have a few days to revise our papers (based on the feedback) before they were due today. Everyone had to do two reviews- the person who posted above you, and the person who posted below you. I got one of my peer reviews on time, and she did a very thoughtful job. I didn't get the other one until today- three days after it was due, and five hours before the deadline for the paper. I was pretty pissed, to be honest. Despite the fact that I had no intention of taking his suggestions (he clearly didn't read my paper carefully- I had already addressed the issues he brought up). The point is, that if I had needed his input, I would have been screwed. I had already turned my paper in (yesterday), but that's hardly the point. I've been meaning to ask my new class-friend Genevieve if she's having the same problem. If so, I'm thinking I might suggest we review each other's papers, unofficially.

I'm also very frustrated that our teacher is not addressing these problems. Yes, the people who turned in the reviews late lost their points- but the bigger problem is that fellow students lost the chance to get helpful input (if the reviewers aren't talking out their asses). If I were in charge of the class, I'd have sent out a very strongly worded email to the whole class, letting them know this was unacceptable.She just said that everyone needs to read the instructions. And they let her teach this class. Clearly, there's a problem with their ability to read the instructions. If they could do that, I probably wouldn't be bitching, now would I? Did I happen to mention she has also failed to offer her own input on our papers? She doesn't do anything with them until she gets the final draft. It's ridiculous.

On the plus side, I'm totally ahead on my next paper.

So, bitching about school aside, not much is going on. I finished some of my WIPs, and got those out of the way. I am test knitting a new pattern for SK, and I'm also working on the third of my Seven Sisters Shawls by Romi- Alcyone (I've already done Merope and Taygete). I've had no time whatsoever to work on my own design, so I've put the notes up until summer classes are over. I just don't need the added aggravation. Here are the pictures of my most recent FO:

This is the shawl I made for Eves!

My second Queen of Heaven

My Taygete

My Litla Dimun Shawl (from the Folk Shawls book)

So I'm off to go do some housework- the sister's family is coming over on Sunday for Father's Day, and for some reason, seem to appreciate it when the house is clean.

In case it's a while before you hear from me again, just remember: I may not post on your blogs these days, but I do think of you.

It's Entirely Possible That I Am Cursed...

2011-05-31T23:06:00.000-07:00

I don't know when, I don't know how, and I don't know who, but it is certainly starting to appear that I have been cursed. I am quite possibly the unluckiest person walking around in the month of May.

First, I cut my finger on a sharp knife washing dishes. Then, I cut my hand trying to open a bottle of wine. Then I broke a toe again. Then I sliced my finger open with my knitting needles. Then I scraped several layers of skin off my finger on my kitchen counter (please don't ask me how). Then I hurt my back cleaning the patio. Then, two days ago, I hurt my neck when I rolled over in my sleep, followed an hour later by the mother of all charlie horses in my right calf. This may seem as though it would be more than enough, but oh no! not for this girl. All of this was merely the prequel to yesterday. When my mother managed to accidentally back her wheelchair into me four or five times.

She really didn't mean to, and she feels terrible about it. See, we were going grocery shopping. And my mother has an electric wheelchair, the kind with those little joystick controllers. I always go around to her side of the car and help her out. Only this time, before I know what's going on, I'm trapped between the wheelchair and the car, and I'm in pain. Turns out her shirt accidentally caught on the joystick, and she'd turned the power on, and as she was trying to shift into her chair, she was accidentally moving it forwards and back. I have a giant bruise on my knee. I really wish there were a better story here. Something involving wildly attractive people and borderline illegal sexual positions, but this is the sad truth of it.

Anyway, in the midst of all this pain, I started my summer classes this week. Let's pray/hope/beg the gods that tomorrow brings a better month for me.

Also, I've been asked by several friends to make some knitting/beading tutorials, so I'm working on the swatches and other information for that. Plus my super-secret-shawl for a friend.

Playing Catch-Up

2011-05-20T15:15:00.000-07:00

Seeing as how I'm being visited by the Self-Injury Gremlin again, and I'm unable to knit at the moment, I've been taking advantage of my (temporary) copious free time to get some organising done.

I mentioned a post or two ago that I was organising my yarn stash. This really shouldn't have been too hard- I don't really have, all things considered, that much yarn (there are people out there with much, much larger stashes than I!). It was also supposed to be easier, given my brand loyalty. I find a brand I love, and I tend to stick with it. Except it turns out I have a few more brands I'm loyal to than I was aware of. But I finally came out victorious, and my closet is now a yarn haven. I thought I'd show off just how practical I ended up being. All my yarn is enclosed in plastic storage systems, complete with labels made out of masking tape- this way, if I ever use all that yarn and replace it with another brand (unlikely as that may be), I can simply strip off the masking tape, and relabel (this is brilliant by my standards). I have 9 individual containers, and one three-drawer system.

See the brilliant labels? Viva La Masking Tape!

This one holds all my Elann laceweight

What doesn't show- the list of yarn taped to the top of the miscellaneous box so I'll know what's in it.

And do you think I stopped there? Oh, foolish children! Of course I didn't. I also cleaned out and organised my pantry, my refrigerator, and my freezer (we have a standing freezer in addition to the one that comes with the fridge). Part of this was taking advantage of the free time, and part of this was necessity- I couldn't find a damn thing for months in that pantry.

The freezer was a stroke of genius I had last night. See, I've been feeling pretty crappy about all the frozen foods I've been living on since I started college. I know, I know- it's a staple of college life. But the truth is, I mostly like cooking, we're on a really tight budget these days (who isn't?), and well, I'm pretty sure processed foods aren't good for you.

See, I knew things were bad when I went looking for something to eat a few days ago, and discovered that I had two frozen spaghetti dinners- TWO! I've been cooking spaghetti since I was ten. It's the first dish I learned how to make. And it's dead easy. I could do it when I was ten. My scary bachelor friends can make it. And here I am, buying it frozen? Clearly things have gotten out of hand.

So I've decided to take the summer to work out some cooking conveniences, and the first thing I decided was that I needed to start planning my meals weekly. This not only works for helping me cook more, but also my budget. If I know what I need ahead of time, I can get everything at once at the store, hopefully eliminating emergency runs that always end up costing more than they should. In order to achieve this goal, I needed to know what was in my freezer- all I knew was that I have some chicken, and various cuts of beef. So we cleared off the kitchen table, put everything from the freezer on it, counted, and made a list that is now on the front of the fridge. I was surprised at some of what I found (two packages of pork chops, eight bags of veggies, three roasts, and a huge bag of pre-cooked shrimp were among the things I didn't know were in there). I also organised everything when I put it away, so I know where everything is (and that's written on the list, too!).

Another thing I'm working on is how to translate some of my favorite frozen dinners into meals I can make myself. Some are obvious and easy- like this honey balsamic chicken I had yesterday. It was literally chicken, red potatoes and cherry tomatoes in a honey balsamic glaze (too many potatoes and not enough of the other two for my tastes). This is very clearly easy. The chicken rigatoni with basil pesto? Less so. I mean, sure I can handle grilled chicken and rigatoni (I'll be making mine with whole grain pasta), but the basil pesto? It's not a normal pesto. It's kind of creamy, so I can only assume there's cream in the sauce. I'm trying to see if I can find a recipe for creamy pesto, but before this dinner, I've never heard of it. But I'm sure I'll think of something. I'll also be experimenting with dishes I can make ahead of time and freeze, and just pop in the oven to reheat. That would probably come in handy during the school semester.

So I have a plan. I think it's a good plan. Tomorrow, I'm going to clean the patio (it's disgusting), and organise the sewing room, so I can actually work on my sewing skills over the summer. If you don't hear from me in a few days, assume that the pile of crap in there fell on me and crushed me to death.

I Get By With A Little Help From My Friends

2011-05-17T18:17:00.000-07:00

I have now fully recovered from the stress of my semester- largely due in part to some awesome music, and a care package from my wonderful friend Eves. I took the last few days to decompress, and put school out of my mind whilst I waited for my final grades to come in. I'm happy to say that despite polisci resembling Virgil's guided tour of the nine circles of Hell, my 4.0 GPA remains intact. I'm sure that helped with things, but the real power behind it all was friendship, lebkuchen and Swiss chocolate.

Eves is a dear and wonderful internet friend, who lives in Switzerland. We share a love of books, gardening and knitting, among other things. Seeing as how she lives in one of the most wonderful countries in the world, she has access to some of the most wonderful chocolate and cookies (for lack of a better word) in all the world. It recently came up in a conversation that I have a deep, abiding, depthless love for lebkuchen (she- like nearly everyone else on the planet- was already aware of my love of chocolate). So my darling Eves offered to send me some (it is very, very difficult to get here in the states). I made her a shawl in return (I've made her one before, and she truly appreciates them). A few days ago, my package arrived. A beautiful package containing chocolate bars, lebkuchen and a really, really pretty head scarf (people here in the States would call it a kerchief- but I feel that doesn't do it justice).

I wish I could explain in words how happy these things make me. The scarf is beautiful, and keeps my hair off my face very nicely. The chocolate (well, the one bar I've been nibbling on) is exquisite. It's got marzipan in it, boys and girls. Chocolate-covered marzipan. It's scrumptious, but very sweet, so I only eat a couple squares at a time. But the lebkuchen- oh! the lebkuchen. For those of you who don't know what that is- it's kind of like a cakey, chewie, gingerbread cookie. That's the best description I can think of (it's really hard to describe- you just have to have one to get it) But it's so much more than that. And it makes me happy. It is, in all honesty, without any exaggeration, my favorite food in the world. It's not only delicious- it makes me happy. I'm calling them Quaalude Cookies, because that's pretty much the effect they have on me (maybe the ginger is calming?). I finally broke down and had one today, and it's exactly like I remembered them being. I'm doling them out very slowly, partly to make them last, partly so I don't undo the headway I've been making losing weight.

But it's more than just the cookies, or the chocolate- it's the fact that I have a friend who doesn't think twice about sending me a care package. And that's what really, really made my day.

But really- look at how pretty this head scarf is:

I just love paisley.

In other news, I've been organising my yarn stash. It's made me want to drink at inappropriate hours of the day, but I'm almost done. I've discovered I have four projects currently on the needles. Which was suprising, as I used to have a rule about only doing one at a time- I'm not really sure what happened there. So my new goal is to finish up three of the four. The last I'm going to frog, because I charted the pattern, and discovered how to bead it, so I want to start over with beads. I originally only had three on the needles, which meant I would have only had to finish two, but I had this very, very naughty yarn that would not stop calling me. It wanted to be wound and cast on into a Coin Lace and Cable. It was very insistent, and finally won (it's a gorgeous sage green worsted wool- of course it won). I'm so weak, but she's beautiful. This is what she looks like right now:

I'll be showing off my new organisation system when it's done, just because I feel someone should admire my hard work. Now I'm off for the rest of the evening, with my long-overdue glass of wine (I don't have jury duty tomorrow after all, so I can stay up and enjoy it).

The Longest 16 Weeks Of My Life

2011-05-13T19:05:00.000-07:00

For the record, I would like to say that I've had some pretty crappy times in my life (by this age, who hasn't?). But for some reason, this last semester stands out as one of the worst.

Normally, when I finish a semester, I want to party. Usually, I'm all, " finals are done! Cue the KC", and it's all "do a little dace, make a little love, get down tonight" (okay, maybe not that middle one, because my sex life is so slow it's practically reversing- but everything else). I wanna see my friends, I wanna groove to some music, I wanna have some drinks. Does it sound like that's what I want right now? No.

I want to sleep. I'm so exhausted, it's like I've reached a whole new level of exhausted, and I need a new word for it. I was so tired yesterday that I could barely cook dinner. Do you want to know what dinner was? Spinach and cheese ravioli- the premade, frozen kind. I was so tired, I could barely bring myself to boil water. Seriously. This is what my final for my polisci class did to me yesterday.

I was- and this is not an exaggeration- so frustrated during my final that I was literally crying. Not so anyone would notice, but there were indeed tears in my eyes (I cry when I'm stressed and frustrated- it's embarrassing). R actually walked away from her essay portion she was so upset. W-C had to talk her into going back and starting over. Why, you might ask? Because the damn questions she asked- on both the multiple choice and the essays- were not things we had really covered, despite her promise to us ("she" in this case is W-C, and no, I'm not going to tell you here what that stands for- some of you are not prepared to hear me use that kind of language). I only got a 45 out of 60 on the multiple choice. I've never missed 15 questions on any exam, ever, including math.

Several students will be filing complaints with the department. We really left it far too long as it was.

All of this, combined with an inability to sleep last night, led to me being a vicious, unreasonable bitch today. I knew I was being a bitch, and just couldn't stop myself. The only time I wasn't bitchy is when I was shopping for a new pair of pants today, and well, that was fun. I met a very nice woman who had a bunch of 30% coupons that needed to be used, so she gave me one. I not only got the elusive pants, but a couple of inexpensive shirts, and a rocking dress that looks killer on me (if I only had some place to wear it). But aside from that very happy hour, I was bitchy. Particularly when I had to take my dad to the doctor on an emergency trip (which turned out just to be a damn blister- more on that later). I was so busy, I didn't eat anything all day until 4:30 (which they screwed up my order, and I got crispy chicken instead of grilled, and it's making me a bit nauseous), contributing to aforementioned bitchiness.

The cause of my inability to sleep last night was the very lovely sunburn I got sitting outside at school yesterday, both before and after the final. My shoulders and chest are a lovely shade of red, somewhere between "cooked lobster" and "whore of Babylon". Sitting on my sofa hurts. Lying down hurts. Putting on a bra made me want to cry. This is probably just another stone on the bitch walking path.

So this bitch is taking the rest of the night off. She's opening a bottle of wine, putting on a good movie (or music), and ignoring the rest of the world..

The Last Few Weeks

2011-05-07T01:14:00.000-07:00

So the last few weeks have been like getting hit by a truck, then having it back up over me for good measure. I find myself behind on nearly everything, including this blog and my friend's blogs. And I'm just not ready to talk about it just yet. So I'm going to fill this post with trivial crap.

A word of warning- I've had an entire bottle of wine, and a beer or two, so please forgive anything that doesn't make sense. I don't trust myself to catch all my typos.

For starters, I took my math final early, and totally rocked it. I got a whopping 100% on my final, and an over all score of 97.5% (hence the wine and beer). I've been celebrating tonight, because that was the payoff of a lot of hard work. I still have two exams left for polisci- one I'm taking tomorrow with G, and my final on Thursday. I'll be studying hard this weekend.

Before I got fairly tipsy tonight, I started on dinner for tomorrow. I'll be making a tri-tip roast, with pasta salad (the part I started tonight). I'm trying to cook more- I'd forgotten how much I enjoy it.

I'm working on knitting a shawl for my friend Eves. I'm nearly done. Then I'm hoping to whip up a graduation present for G. She's graduating GCC this Friday, and transferring to ASU West. Awesome, no?

I'm sure I had other things to talk about, but I just can't seem to remember them at the moment. I'm off to watch some TV, and drink some water in an effort not to have a hangover in the morning. Wish me luck.

And they claim to love me

2011-04-18T19:23:00.000-07:00

This is my reaction whenever my friends ambush with blind dates and set ups. This has, sadly, become a recurring nuisance in my life of late.

See, of all my friends (meaning my local, in real life friends) are in committed relationships. I am, as the affectionately refer to me, "the last holdout". And some of them have made it their mission in life to "find me a man". Never mind how I feel on the subject.

Now, my friends have gotten clever. They don't do this directly, where I will be in a position to say no. They take turns, waiting until I agree to go out with them for fun, and "just happen to run into" so and so. Or they'll "just happen" to invite so-and-so along, to "make it an even number". I am not fooled by any of this.

The problem here is that sadly, many of my friends have no idea what I like in a man (the only person who does is the only person who would never do this to me- Smallfry). Looks are completely secondary to me. Personality has so much more to do with my attraction to a person- even right off the bat (as opposed to being attracted to looks, and then adjusting based on personality). Part of this is because I can find something attractive in just about any physical type. But personality? Oh, the list of turn offs is long.

So recently, my various friends banded together, and managed to ambush me with three really awful dates. I thought I'd share these with you (so you can share in my outrage).

First up- the incredibly boring accountant. He spent the entire evening talking about taxes, codes, loopholes, and a bunch of forms I really had no comprehension of. He also spent a great deal of time letting me know just how busy he was this time of year (understandable), and how grateful I should be that he made time for me (less understandable). Now, I have a fair amount of patience for things like this, but even I have a limit. I knew it was time to end the evening when I found myself thinking the following:

This tablecloth is really nice.
I bet it's flammable.
I bet if I just "accidentally" knock the candles over, setting it on fire-maybe catch the centerpiece with it- I could slip out unnoticed in the ensuing chaos.

When you find yourself considering arson, it's probably time to make your excuses and go.

The second date actually started off fine, except he kept drinking. And drinking. And drinking some more. I honestly don't know if I've ever seen anyone drink that many scotch and sodas in one sitting. And the more he drank, the more he felt like telling me about his ex wife. I left before dessert, after leaving his keys with the bartender.

But if you think that was bad, brace yourself for date number three. I was supposed to be having dinner with two of my friends, who'd managed to get a babysitter for the evening. We get to the restaurant, and lo and behold, we "run into" their friend- we'll be calling him "Dante" for this, as dinner with him was like strolling through the nine circles of hell, only less fun. First, "Dante" kept trying to tell me what drink to order (I don't drink on school nights), and what food to order (I'm 29 years old- I've got a pretty good idea of what I like). But the worst part- the part so bad I don't need to tell you anything else about the date- is that he (and I mean this literally, without any exaggeration) directed all questions and comments for the entire evening to my breasts. Yeah, you heard me. I swear- to whatever god you believe in- at one point he actually said, "so, CJ's boobs; I heard you're in college. What's your major?" As if they somehow operate independently of me, and the rest of me is simply transportation for them. Now, this is where I normally would have left, except my friends drove (never making that mistake again). To be fair, my friends did have the decency to be horrified by his behaviour, but they still ambushed me, and they still waited 90 minutes to make their excuses to leave (sadly, I had no cab money, or believe me, I would have left).

Directly to my breasts. I poured my iced tea down his pants.

Knitting: The Nirvana And The Nightmare

2011-04-14T22:35:00.000-07:00

Today I experienced both sides of the fabulous (and occasionally frightening) knitting world.

First, the nirvana. Needler's Nest. My LYS (that's local yarn store for you non-knitters who read this blog because ~~I make you feel guilty if you don't~~ you love me). I was in search of yarn to make my Eveline shawl- the official version I am sending to its namesake. Sadly, the white yarn I had been hoping to use obscured the pattern. I was thinking this was the case, but I wasn't quite sure- so, armed with a budget, my debit card, and my test-knit-so-far version, I went in search of opinions and yarn. I found both. At my LYS, there is a teacher. Her name is Irene. She is an experienced knitter. Seriously experienced. She is Scottish, and learned as a wee little girl there. She's been knitting for over 65 years. I am in awe. I explained my situation, and asked for advice. She agreed with me that the white was part of the problem (I wasn't sure, as I don't like white, or wear white, and thought perhaps I was just prejudiced against it). The other problem is that my needles are too big. The stockinette in between my eyelets is way too loose. She suggested a new needle size, and approved my choices of yarn. Other than that, she said I was doing just fine for my first design.

What was really, truly inspiring about talking to her was just how much she knows. She knew the type of eyelet I was doing by sight (quatrefoil, for those interested). She knew the effect I was going for. She recommended an alternative to bobbles (as I hate them), and told me how to do it. And what was really, really impressive- I told her what pattern I was going to use for the next part of my pattern, and she knew what I was talking about (both the pattern I'm going with, and the one I abandoned). To tell someone that you are doing a variation on the shetland horseshoe, and have them know immediately what you are talking about is just incredible (the part where she said it was a good choice was quite the ego boost). I've never experienced this before. My LYS is not just for yarn. It is also a great source of knowledge. Once my semester is over I'm going to start attending open knitting meetings. Who knows what I might pick up from her? (and my other two ladies there, of course).

The nightmare, however. Oh, the nightmare came just a few hours later.

I have a moth loose in my house somewhere. I need say nothing more.

Grrr, Growl, and Sigh

2011-04-13T07:41:00.000-07:00

Hello, my name is CJ, and I'm a bad blogger. It's been 27 days since I last blogged, or in fact, commented on my friends' blogs (which I do read every day, I promise).

I'm really sorry about that. School (and frankly, life in general) has been a little overwhelming the past few weeks.

I've had a non-stop battle with financial aid, my polisci class continues to have issues, and quadratic equations suck and take forever to do. So-called "friends" ambush me with really bad dates, I lost my knitting mojo, and G and R have both had some major personal health issues. Oh, and I'm totally, absolutely sleep deprived.

So financial Aid first returned half of the loan money I've been waiting on. They fixed it, but still. I got a letter from the company who services my loans, which is how I found out. The school claims that it was "just the way the paperwork had to be done". I believe this to be code for "we totally fucked something up". Then, they put a hold on my account for $1780. I assumed this was a mistake, and ignored it for a couple of weeks, until I needed to call yesterday to find out where my money was (the school has disbursed it to the bank they use, but the bank hasn't given it to me- the school claims they can't help me with this, which I believe to be bullshit). While I had them on the phone, I asked about this weird hold. After being put on hold for ten minutes- twice!-, they said it was the cashier's office, and transferred me to them. Cashier's says that it was from financial aid, charging me for the fall loans- the ones I didn't receive because the morons put me on academic probation, due to their own screw up. Thankfully, the woman from cashier's not only had a brain, but also a kind soul, and called financial aid, requested a supervisor, and got the supervisor to fix it. See, when I wasn't able to get my aid for fall, it rolled over into spring (if you only take out for spring, you are allowed the full amount for the year). I am deeply grateful to that woman. The hold is off my account, and now my summer and fall aid can be processed correctly. Financial aid, however, remains on my shit list. Now, if someone would just give me the money I'm waiting on- and frankly need.

I've decided to take some summer classes, because I found that two of my core requirements are offered, and can be taken completely online. This means I will still be able to experiment with meds for my fibro. The bad news is that I will have to take out a bit more in loans, as I spent the money I was saving for summer because I didn't think I would be taking classes. I had no idea English 101 and Psych 101 would be offered online. I debated not taking anything, but I really want to start making up for the fact that I've only gone part time up until now (I will be going full time starting in Fall).

Between a storm Friday night, a drunken whore of a sister Saturday night, a gods-awful amount of pain Sunday night, and a late over-the-phone study session Monday night, I've had very little sleep the last several days.

My knitting mojo temporarily abandoned me. I didn't knit for about three weeks. I literally had no interest in it. Then when I did, I couldn't find a yarn and pattern combination I liked. On the plus side, I found my reading mojo, and got more books read during those three weeks than I have in the whole last year. I am now working on a test knit for my own pattern, put together and adapted from Barbara G Walker's A Treasury Of Knitting Patterns. It's a challenge, here and there, when something doesn't work out the way I want, but I'm at least getting the basics right. I currently have too much stockinette from the design effect I was attempting- I'll try it another way right below it, and if that works, I'll be ripping out to start over, with Chart A working correctly. After that, I'm damn well going to start remembering to lifeline.

My poor friend R- I'm not sure if I've mentioned her before, but I met her and G in polisci this semester, and they have quickly become two of my closest friends- threw out her back, got a hernia, and did something to her rotator cuff over the weekend while she is moving. She's in a lot of pain, and missed our test yesterday (our teacher, however, is not soulless, and understood). She was high on painkillers when I talked to her yesterday morning, and it was very funny- except the part where she's in pain. G spent yesterday at the hospital while her boyfriend had rods put in his spine to keep his vertebrae in place. Apparently, they are shifting a little, and shouldn't be. She also missed the test. I spent the whole day worried about the two of them, but think I managed to do fine on the test. Which is good, because I hate this class, and haven't been putting in the effort I usually would (I know- that's bad, and I promise to attempt to work harder). I've really gotten to the point (and so have G and R) where we really don't care, so long as we get out with a passing grade. Does that tell you all how sick I am of this class?

In other random news before I go to school:

As I mentioned before, my friends ambushed me with a really bad date. I'll be blogging about that later.

I'm obsessed with the band Pony Pony Run Run. They are French, but sing in English (not that that's ever stopped me from listening to Indochine), and write the catchiest damn power pop songs. It makes me happy. Just thought I'd share.

I lost five pounds. Who's proud of me?

I went clothes shopping. That was fun. I found a great sale, which was even more fun.

I'm getting a 97.6% overall in math. It's possible that is better than my grade in polisci.

Checking In...

2011-03-16T17:41:00.000-07:00

So I'm on spring break this week- and feeling lazier than I have in ages. I'll admit, I've been crashing pretty hard this week. So hard, in fact, that I forgot I had am MRI appointment Monday morning. It'll be postponed along with everything else until after my semester is over. I really don't feel like missing more school for medical appointments. Things have been rough, and I've been exhausted. My dad's been having a bad run of things, healthwise lately, and it's taken a big toll on me. It just feels like I can't get a break.

So while I try desperately to enjoy what's left of my week off, I thought I'd update you all on the little things...

For starters, I totally have to show off my latest shawl. I finished it a week ago, and I can't believe I haven't put it up here yet. I'm so freakin' proud of it, and it's my favorite of SK's designs. This one's a little special, as I was working out some personal problems with it (I'm not done with those problems yet, but the project helped). It was a smashing success among my friends, both in person and on Ravelry. So here she is:

It has beads as well as nupps, but none of the pictures showed them. I was devastated when it warmed up practically overnight, and we started hitting high 80s/low 90s and I couldn't wear it. I'm going to be making another one for a friend.

I got a haircut. That's my exciting news for the week. I have bangs now.

I'm currently working on four different projects (despite my resolution when I first took up knitting that I would *not* become one of those people): Romi Hill's Taygete, MMario's Queen Anne's Lace, the Cambria Wrap (my at-school project), and Sej's throw for her new apartment (she may have lived there a year by the time I finish it).

I'm currently listening to Beady Eye's debut album- it's not bad. It's no Oasis, but it's not bad. For those who don't know, Beady Eye is the band the remaining members of Oasis formed when Noel Gallagher left the band (some of you may remember my hysterical sobbing when that happened). For those of you wondering why I'm a fan, please try to remember I was a teenager in the 90s. It explains all my musical tastes. For those of you who don't know who Oasis was, I'm sorry- there's nothing I can do for you. I also recently got OMD's singles collection- OMD are one of my fave 80s groups (yes, I remember the 80s- more than I should have to, given the decade had already started when I was born). In other news, Richard Ashcroft is putting out a new album in a week or two, and I'm totally stoked. I've long worshipped at the altar of Mad Richard.

I wish some of the newer British bands were better than they are. There's only a few I currently like (Scouting For Girls is pure pop perfection), or can tolerate (Mumford and Sons are okay in small doses), and only one or two I'm devoted to (I'm still pissed I Am Kloot lost the Mercury Prize- to the freakin' XX). Several of my faves broke up- damn you, Mumm-Ra! But most of the others make me want to vomit. It makes it very hard to enjoy Absolute Radio these days.

To get back on track here- I frequently digress when I'm talking music- I'm doing well in school. Math is still a lot of work, but I'm currently getting a 98%. I'm also getting an A in polisci, but I still hate the class. It's at least better when I'm hanging with G and R, my new friends. We formed a study group, and it makes it more fun.

I think that's all that's going on for now. I'm still really tired, and it's hard to focus on anything for any length of time, including this blog. I'll drop in again soon.

What I'm About To Say Will Shock You

2011-03-09T06:53:00.000-08:00

And I mean that literally. It will shock you, and maybe even cause you to believe that it is not really me posting this- so I'm warning you, and I'm asking you, should you choose to read this post, that you read the whole thing and try to understand my point before you react. This is a political post, so for those of you who just don't care, now's the time to leave. Are you ready? Brace yourself, and click the "read more" link below.

President Obama needs to defend DOMA.

Now, remember, you all promised to breathe, and read through. Try to remember to do that now, while I elaborate on that statement.

First off, let me be clear- I do not like DOMA, I do not support DOMA, and it is unquestionably unconstitutional. However, the President needs to order the Justice Department to defend it in court. Because it's his job, and I'll elaborate on that in a moment.

For those of you who don't know what DOMA (the Defense of Marriage Act) is, it's this crap piece of legislation from about 15 years ago, which states that the federal government does not have to recognise gay marriages, nor do states that don't allow gay marriage have to recognise those performed in states where it is legal. There are two big, big reasons this is unconstitutional.

For starter, most of us are now familiar with the 14th amendment, which the Supreme Court has used to incorporate the Bill of Rights to the states (interesting fact: the US Constitution originally only applied to the federal government). It says flat out in section one, that all persons born in the United States are entitled to all the rights and liberties afforded by the constitution. But this issue goes beyod that.

There's a little thing in Article 4, section 1, called the full faith and credit clause. This is what is actually says: "Full Faith and Credit shall be given in each State to the public Acts, Records, and judicial Proceedings of every other State. And the Congress may by general Laws prescribe the Manner in which such Acts, Records and Proceedings shall be proved, and the Effect thereof"

For those of you who don't speak constitution, this means that if you get married in NY, CA has to honor that marriage. If you have a custody decision in WY, the WA has to honor it. So technically, under the Constitution, AZ should have to honor any marriage from MA, no matter what the sexes of the parties are.

Congress passed DOMA to get around this. Notice how, in the quote above, that it says Congress gets to set the rules over how these records are proven (ie- a marriage license, a court decree, a birth certificate). It doesn't say that Congress gets to pass laws around this if they don't like it. And it's been being argued in court since the first state allowed gay marriage. It's expected to get thrown out in a federal court in the near future. It's possible to go to the Supreme Court in the next few years. However....

You know what else the Constitution says? That it's the job of the President to defend things like this in court. And nowhere in there does it say that he only has to do it if he likes the law. It's a job requirement. And by refusing to defend this law, he is setting a very bad precedent. Future presidents can now point to this as a reason they no longer wish to fight for laws in court if they don't like them. A president could refuse to defend the healthcare act ten years from now, because they were opposed to it. A president could refuse to defend the civil rights act, because they think it is too encompassing. The list of things that could happen is long, and frankly, a little scary. I realise this sounds alarmist, but if you think about it, it's really not. There are actual members of Congress, who many think will run for president within the next two election cycles, who have publicly stated they are against the healthcare bill or believe the civil rights act was too big. Yes boys and girls- the Civil rights act.

So I'm sorry- I really am, I hate this law so much- but the President needs to tell the Justice Department to defend this (he can always tell them to do a crap job of it).

Oh, and about John Boehnor, who is threatening to get a group of conservatives to fight it instead? It's not your damn job. Stop butting in where it's not your business, and go back to what you are actually supposed to be doing- not that you seem to remember what that is.

I am done now. You may all commence with the stone throwing.

Also, I resever the right to come back and flesh this out later- I'm throwing this up before school.

Inflicting My Poetry On You

2011-03-05T19:01:00.000-08:00

So here's the thing- clearly, by now, you know I write poetry. And you also might have noticed in the past (when I blogged regularly) that Nix loves my poetry and begs me to share. This is my attempt to keep him from pestering me day and night (seriously- he texts me at all kinds of inappropriate hours). I remember that previously, I was in the middle of the "Bleed" series, however, I don't remember where I was, and need time to go through old posts to find the answer. So, to ~~keep him at bay~~ hold him over, I thought I throw out these two I wrote a few years ago (you'll figure out, if you haven't already, that I tend to write sequels- I'll be reading an old poem, and new words will just start falling into my head- and there's a lot of space in my head, so I try and get them out before they get lost and scared). Feel free to skip it if poetry is not your thing.

Jupiter’s Burning

Dark has settled across the sky
It’s the kind of feeling you could never buy
You feel it seep into the cracks of your mind
Afraid to look ‘cause you know what you’ll find
You feel them creeping up from behind
Small spaces don’t make you feel this confined
You’re on the run now- the instinct is galling
You don’t want to fight, you just want the sky to stop falling
You can’t quite breathe- the weight’s too concerning
You look up for a moment and see Jupiter’s burning
You can’t stop moving, it’s all down to you
Gotta keep moving, the hours are few
Slapped across the face, you know it’s your fault
Taste the blood on your tongue like salt
Brace yourself- the time has come
Though you’d rather keep moving until you’re numb
Turn to face them but they never take form
Illusion lives in smoke and storm
Bluffing as you have since the beginning
Smile at the monsters-they’ll never know they’re winning

Jupiter’s Burning, pt 2

Dark has settled across the sky
There’s no light for passers by
You feel it running along your spine
You can’t help taking it as a sign
You feel them closing in all around
You’ve never been so tightly wound
Your pace quickens- you can’t help but run
Trying to keep from coming undone
Catch your breath, hope the world’s still turning
Look to the sky, Jupiter’s still burning
Gotta keep moving, try not to fall
You can’t remember ever feeling this small
Slapped across the face, it’s always the same
You miss your mark, you’re off your aim
Brace yourself- it’s finally time
But you couldn’t even do this in your prime
They bring it with them- a silver storm
Sit back and wait to perform
Smile at them, keep them spinning
Just don’t let them know they’re winning

Pimpin' My Friend's Pattern

2011-03-05T18:46:00.000-08:00

So before I forget, I wanted to post this link, in case any of you have the need/desire to make an adorable baby coat.

My friend Meg, aka The Witty Knitter, just released this fabulous pattern- Liv' Coat-, over at Knitpics. It's absolutely adorable, and fairly simple in it's construction (level is advanced beginner). I think it's so cute I'm saving to buy the yarn to make one for the little Sweet Pea (aka Mackenzie, aka SexyBob's little girl). This is a link to Meg's page, where you can see the pattern being modeled by one of her 600 children, I believe to be Lox (I could be wrong). Please, go and check it out, and think of it the next time you need to knit a baby item. It's that awesome.

So Here's The Thing...

2011-03-04T19:56:00.000-08:00

I know I promised to write a post about something this article that's been bugging me (like, a week ago now). However, I've been extraordinarily tired this week- a wild combination of homework, fibro pain, and parental health issues. Last Saturday, I was up until 3 in the morning, writing poetry, because the damn muse wouldn't let me sleep. I then had to get up at seven Sunday morning. This has been a pretty steady theme over the week.

How does this relate to the topic at hand, you might be asking yourselves?
Well, I have a general rule when it comes to writing about public issues, be them political or social- I try to be fully rested, and not a sleep-deprived pinhead when I actually undertake the mission. It's important to me to be as collective and coherent with my thoughts as possible, because I always try to use actual facts rather than just personal opinion in these matters. I find that difficult when I'm tired. So, in the interest of being as fair as possible, I've put that particular post off until I've gotten some rest.

In the meantime, if any one's interested- I got a 100% on my last math test (yay me!), and this chapter is going pretty well so far. We are still facing a gods-awful amount of frustration with the polisci class, but I figure since I've been bitching about it non-stop for seven weeks, I should probably take a break.

I've been knitting a bit here and there- I just haven't had as much time this week- alternating between my Robin's Return and my QAL. I'm hoping to get the first one finished over the weekend, so I can devote my full time to the QAL (RR is shorter, therefore I'm focusing on it more right now- plus, to be honest, I really enjoy it when I am the first one to finish something on the board. I blame Smallfry, who fostered my competitive nature).

But mostly my spare time has been spent with my poetry this week. I don't know what's going on, but I just crawled into after Saturday. I've just turned on some of my favorite 90's albums/playlists (of which there are a multitude- those were my teenage years, after all), lit a candle or two, and curled up with pen and paper. Very much like when I was a teenager. And speaking of- I feel like getting back to that now (if any one's interested, it's the Cranberries tonight).

And yes Nixon, I will post one or two for you.

I Swear I Have The Best Of Intentions

2011-02-26T12:58:00.000-08:00

I get up every morning, and say I will blog today. But my coffee generally hasn't kicked in yet. Then it's off to school, where I go in early and do my math homework in the math tutoring building, where there are people there who are (supposedly) qualified to help me. Then there's class, and on T/TH, more class, and then homework, and working out, and knitting, which frankly I love more than blogging. And next thing I know, it's been 10 days since I last posted (don't believe me? I started this post Tuesday morning. it's now Saturday afternoon).

Sorry about that. Really.
So I thought I'd do a hit-and-run week in review, where I just throw a quick version of everything at you. I'll be blogging more later about a news article that has just burned my ass.

Matriculation Monday- It was a very busy week for school. Math started out great, then kicked my ass for a couple days, then got great again. I have a test to take Monday morning, which I need to study for tomorrow. Polisci was a bitch this week, with a chapter of reading and a double-quiz to do, then a really big exam on Thursday. I did pretty well on the multiple choice part (67 out of 73), considering that I'd lost some of my notes, and frankly don't like the class all that much so I don't pay quite enough attention. That part was take home, open note, so it was nice. However, on Thursday, we had to write three short essays in class, which was pretty evil, as far as I'm concerned. I don't write well on the fly, and expecting us to write three separate three-to-four paragraph essays in 75 minutes seems a tad unreasonable. I'm still waiting on my grade for that. Fortunately, I have 50 points of extra credit, should she ever get around to grading them. I also have the option of doing an extra newsmaker report this weekend, but I've been trying to hold off on that until I see my grades (I don't want to make unnecessary work for myself- I don't like this class that much).

Review Tuesday- The most recent series of Primeval concluded last Saturday, and it kicked ass! I've loved the show from the beginning, but with the changes this season, I was leery. For those of you who don't know what I'm talking about- Primeval is a British show that's been airing on ~~The Gordon Ramsey Channel~~ BBC America. I've actually known (and owned) the show since before it started airing here, courtesy of my UK friends who insisted I would love it and had to buy it from Amazon UK (the same thing happened with Torchwood, too). And my friends were right- I did love it. But it was cancelled after series three, then resurrected, but there were some major changes to the cast over the last season and during the break, so I was afraid that it would suck. I was wrong. As much as I loved it when it began, I think I actually like the post-Cutter version better. I give it four stars for being excellently entertaining, with a fifth bonus star for coming back better than before. If you like shows of a supernatural bent, with fun action sequences and laugh-out-loud moments, and you're willing to suspend disbelief for a few hours, I highly recommend checking this one out.

WIP Wednesday- I finished my Merope, started a scarf based on it, made a Travelling Woman and subsequently sent it to the frog pond, am working on my third Queen Anne's Lace (hopefully this one will survive) KAL with Paige from the Alpaca With A Twist Ravelry group, threw a Dancing Cranes on the needles for something quick and easy to work on, started MMario's Lil Bunny Foo Foo but have had to put that in hibernation until I finish up a couple of these others, and am getting ready to start another SK KAL, Longing For Robin's Return. I am a busy little knitter.

I don't remember what Thursdays were for. Sorry.

Random Roundup- Somehow, despite missing two weeks of workouts due to a gods-awful amount of homework, I've still managed to lose a couple more pounds. I'm determined to get more workouts in from now on. I've shown an amazing amount of restraint with the girl scout cookies I've gotten. You should all be really impressed with me. I'm also trying to cook more, but I hate cooking when I'm swamped with homework.

Oh, and can I just share the thing two of my dumbass classmates did? Last Friday, right there, in the middle of the hallway, in front of at least 1/3 of the class, two of the guys in my math class made a deal for one of them to pay the other to do his homework. They were subsequently shocked when Don found out (Don being the god who teaches the class- and okay, I'm the one who told him- it was matter of principle). Idiots. I hope that entertained you as much as it entertained me.

So for now I'm off, to overdye some uglyass yarn I got, since I have some free time. I'll be back either later today or tomorrow to post on the Huffington Post article that got me in a bit of a tizzy.

A Week In Review?

2011-02-11T17:41:00.000-08:00

Yes, that's a question, not a statement. I'm not really sure what this post is about. It's sort of a hodgepodge.

In between struggling with guilt over the mad quantities of yarn I bought, I actually managed to go to school, get some homework done, and even get in a few work outs. There was also some knitting.

So first up- I've been strangely wracked with guilt over the yarn shopping spree. I'm not really sure why. I had the money. I stayed within budget. I got nearly everything on sale. It's an investment for the summer (yes, I even got yarn I can knit with and wear during the summer). So I'm not really sure what's been going on. I mean, sure I knew I needed help, when I found myself considering getting into the tattoo money for more Madelinetosh (and aren't you just damned impressed that I have money left over for a tattoo?), but to feel actual guilt? For days? It's madness. I'm still refusing Nix's pleas for a picture with it all laid out on my bed (largely because I don't want to try to fit it all on my bed- which should tell you all how insane this is, because I have a queen size bed). I believe this to be part of my denial.

In the meantime, I will be knitting only from stash for the foreseeable future (meaning, when I've managed to knit enough of this that I no longer have any guilt for buying so much yarn). I figure it will take about two years- mostly because while I'll get a crapload knit over the summer, my knitting time will be drastically reduced starting next fall, when my classload doubles and I start taking Spanish.

Speaking of knitting, I'm working on this: Merope, the first in the Seven Sisters shawls by Romi Hill. I got the pattern ebook for Yule, and I'm loving them all. I'm making this in my MadelineTosh Pashmina, which is unbelievably lovely. She's nearly done, but I haven't quite gotten there yet, due to a whole crapload of homework. My Firmaments shawl is on hold until summer- both my KAL partner and I were having problems with one of the charts, and it just wasn't working for us. It also has a knit-on border, which I've never done before, and while I do want to learn how, I didn't figure that was a good idea during the school year. I'm damned fond of those good grades I get. And my teachers seem to prefer me when I'm not a babbling mess (okay, well, I usually am, but in a way that amuses them, not a scary, knitting-induced way that only other knitters understand).

School has been a bit difficult due to the endless tech problems we've been experiencing. My math is actually going pretty well, but Polisci? Well, I wish ill things on Blackboard. I breifly fantasized about cursing the creator of the software ~~with genital warts~~. We can't access some things, we can't upload some things, it randomly logs us off... it's very frustrating. I think that's part of the reason I'm having a hard time with this class. By all accounts, this should be the easiest Polisci class I take here- it's a 100 level, and the other three were 200 levels. But the stress is not helping. Add in the fact that I'm one of the handful of socialists in America, and you have a recipe for disaster (the class is on American Government). I suck it up, and do my homework, and remind myself that drinking during studying generally doesn't go well.

In news to be filed under person growth (or some such thing), I've lost a few more pounds. I've been working very hard towards making sure I work out during the school week. Yes, it costs me in knitting time, but it's worth it- especially days like today when I discover I can fit into a pair of pants from a couple years ago. What the hell- I'm vain and I'm okay with it. My Wii turns out to be the vest investment ever. I use it most days to work out, although I do use my rowing machine when I need time to think- such as when I have to write a paper. It's all mindless and everything (much like myself). But the Wii- oh, the Wii is ridiculous fun. I forget I'm working out. I lose track of time. I forget ~~to cook dinner~~ that I used to hate working out. It's awesome. Mix that with my yoga dvds, and I'm happy (yes, I know you can use your Wii for yoga- I tried it and I didn't like it).

So for now, I'm off to get in some more knitting time, before I have to kick my own ass studying this weekend. My friend Gulia and I have started studying together for polisci, and it makes it more fun, but in addition to having a math test on Monday, we have a report due on Tuesday, extra credit we are trying to get in by Sunday, and a reading summary due by Thursday. It will be a rough weekend for the both of us.

Updates, My New Toy, And Things Not To Say To Me If You Want To Remain My Friend

2011-02-06T21:53:00.000-08:00

Yeah, I'm cramming some stuff in this post, since I can't seem to make myself follow the schedule I created.

First up, does anyone know how many medical tests one must undergo before they are officially science experiments? Because I feel like I'm reaching that point.

First, there's all the blood work. And the glucose tolerance test. And the neuro tests. On Thursday, there was the EMG test, which was really awful. They run electrical currents through your nerves to check for damage. Then they do something similar for your muscles, except that involves a needle. My neurologist was seriously impressed by my pain tolerance level. I was very nearly crying at some points, but I soldiered on (I wanted the damn thing over with- it's the same principle as a tattoo). Now I have to have an MRI tomorrow.

The good news is that they were able to narrow down the list of what could be wrong with me. In fact, Dr. V is pretty damn sure it's Fibromyalgia. Turns out, the burning pain in my legs I've been told for the past four years was peripheral neuropathy? It's not. There's no damage to the nerves or muscles whatsoever. It's just random pain (not that this is fantastic or anything- it still fucking hurts and it still fucking sucks). The test turned out to be vital, but it was really, really horrible. Dr. Horrible-horrible. It should have had it's own Sing-A-Long Blog*. It made all the pain I normally have double. I missed two days of school and couldn't knit for three days (have you ever seen me not knit for three days? It's not pretty). On top of all of this, the lab lost my damn results, and I may have to have all the blood work and the glucose tolerance test done again- which I do not want! I am checking with Dr. V's office tomorrow to see if they were able to track it down. If not, it's just going to have to wait until spring break, because I really don't want to miss anymore classes for appointments or tests.

In other, more fun news, I got an electric yarn winder. I've been wanting one for a while (since last summer when I hurt my shoulder and using a manual winder now hurts like a mofo), but mixed reviews had kept me thinking on it a while. Unfortunately, given my propensity for buying skeins of laceweight yarn, which tend to have a high yardage, it was becoming necessary. Especially my Indian silk, which I tend to get several thousand yards of. Once I realised what a lot of the complaints were, I started to make sense of them, and realised a lot of it was the operators and not the machine. Several people complained about how their yarn "tangled when they walked away from it". I beg your pardon here: I don't mean to be rude, but in what fucking reality does it seem like a good idea to walk away from your yarn when it's attached to something motorized? I mean, really.

So it finally came, and I took her for a spin, doing a test run with my Araucania Ruca, and I have to say, it did quick work, and made the prettiest yarn cake I've ever seen. It's all neat and tidy. It made quick work of my silk, which comes with about 1000 yards per hank- had it wound into the neatest little cake in 20 minutes (it took me three hours by hand for the first one). I just make sure to keep the yarn a little loose on the swift, keep the speed low until it gets going, and keep my hand on the off switch at all times (that way, if there's a snag or tangle, I can turn it off quickly). Lookie here, and you can see how neat the cakes come out.

See? Isn't that nice? That's the Ruca. And here you can see the machine itself

That thing hanging down is the guide arm- you thread the yarn through it just like you would a manual winder, and it lies on top of the yarn while it's winding.

And finally, before I throw in the towel and go to bed, a list of things people (read: friends) should never, ever say to me (because one did, and I nearly threw her out of my house)**

1) Upon looking at my beautiful, handmade shawls: I should totally have you make me one

I am not your knitting bitch. You do not have me do anything. You may ask me, nicely, if I would consider making one for you, and of course, you offer to pay for the yarn.

2) Upon discovering my stash, go "Oh my gods, this one would be perfect. And this one. And this one. Could you put these three together to make it. I can have these, right? You're not using them"

One, stay out of my stash. Would you go into my underwear drawer like that? Didn't think so. Two, no, I cannot put those three together for the shawl you have yet to actually ask me to make you. No, you may not have them. They are mine. I bought for me, for specific projects. I may not be using them-at the moment- but I assure you, I will. Also, I am not a yarn store. I will gladly help you pick out the appropriate yarn, upon a proper request for a project.

3) Upon looking at my finished works, state which pattern you like best, then proceed to tell me how to change it, because you want it "twice as big, so it will hang down to here" and point to three-quarters of the way down your arm. Then ignore me as I explain that a triangle won't really do that, and we should do something rectangular. Then insist that this is the pattern you want.

Trust me when I say you really, really do not want to double the Simplicity Triangular Shawl. One, it will be very large. Two, I will grow to hate you as I try to knit it, which you still have not politely asked me to do.

4) After I explain to you that the particular project you have picked out really requires a worsted weight, look at me and say "I really don't understand about these things. I'm not the knitter; you are" and then proceed to argue with me when I once again explain why you can't have the yarn in my stash.

A) Again, that yarn is mine, bitch. B) most of my yarn is lace or sock weight. Please see your comment above, realise the truth of what you have said, and stop arguing. C) No, you cannot have my worsted weight. I don't have much, there is not enough there, and again, please refer to statement A.

5) Go back and forth three dozen times about whether you want the black and charcoal tonal or the variegated purples. Then decide on the black and charcoal. Then attempt to change your mind three seconds after I ask you if you are sure because I'm about to click "place order", and after that, it can't be change.

Gods damn it, didn't I ask three times if you were sure? Didn't I tell you to be sure because once I placed the order, that's the yarn you are getting? Because I'm pretty damn sure I did, and you are going to be lucky to get any damn thing from me at all.

Also- other ways to piss me off? Drink five cups of my coffee. Drink a fair amount out of my Bailey's (straight from the bottle no less. There are cups all over my room. Would it have killed you to use one?) Pull out my dvds as you go through them, and don't put any of them away. Leave for a doctors appointment, be gone for three hours, and don't call to say you are running quite late, because you screwed up your appointment time. Leave your baby's dirty diaper on my bedroom floor.

No, she will never be invited over again.

*(if you don't get the reference A) your world is a sad and dark place and B) google Dr. Horrible's Sing-A-Long Blog, and prepared to laugh your ass off)

**The exception to this is, of course, Smallfry. She can say anything she wants to me.

So it's very possible I need an intervention

2011-02-01T20:32:00.000-08:00

In my defense, before I get started here (and you all start judging me a bit harshly), I don't know of a single other knitter who can walk away from a yarn sale.

So I was recently buying yarn, as you probably guessed. I had some money saved from the holidays and the birthday, and the money I had painstakingly saved for summer classes which I will now not be taking (I will be spending the summer experimenting with medications for my pain). As student loans don't cover summer classes, I saved for it out of my own, doing extra things for my parents, in return for "spending money" (yes, it's like having an allowance- at 29. It is a little humiliating, I'll admit- but yarn money is yarn money, and I apparently really will whore myself for yarn). When I decided not to take the summer class- mostly because I don't want to try experimenting with meds during the school year, which only leaves the summer, and those classes are hard enough because they shove 16 weeks of education into 5- I decided I wanted to spend my money on something that will undoubtedly save my sanity, in the event I have problems with the meds (which is a strong possibility for anyone).

So off I went in search of end-of-year sales and closeouts. I wanted to make the most of my money, because it's pretty much all the yarn money I have for the year (which I'm trying not to think about too hard, as it tends to make me a bit lightheaded). And sales I found. I found oodles of sales (oodles- really. There's no other word for it). And no, I'm not really willing to tell you where- you might look there next time I have yarn money, and swipe all the yarn I like. Plus, all the sales are over now anyway.

It's just that, as my yarn has started to arrive, I've realised that perhaps I shopped a bit more than was reasonable (if the look on my mother's face is any indication). Now, I didn't overspend- I stayed within my budget, including having money left over for some clothes and a few wicked pairs of boots. But as my stash drawers started to overflow, and I started finding yarn in odd places (like my desk, and my bathroom cupboards), I started to feel that perhaps, there is such a thing as too much yarn (don't worry- I'm fairly certain, that as soon as I have it all organized, this feeling will pass). I was actually considering spreading the pictures out over a few posts, in hopes that you all won't realise quite how much I've gotten.

In my (further) defense, literally 90% of everything I got was on sale. I literally paid full price for only a handful of yarns (and they were mostly inexpensive to begin with). And also- over half of it was on clearance. But as I was updating my stash on Rav, and trying to devise an oraganisational system, I got a bit dizzy. I got a lot of freakin' yarn. To list this all (I can't put up picts, because I'm still waiting on some of it, and I'm going to have to take one picture of all of it somewhere big, because I don't think I can load all the pictures if I did it individually), I got:

5 skeins Araucania Itata Multy in 1018
5 skeins Araucania Itata Multy in 1022
4 skeins Araucania Itata solid in Ruali Brown
6 skeins Araucania Itata solid in Pablano Green
3 skeins Araucania Ruca in Spearmint Green
3 skeins Araucania Ruca in Rose/Slate Blue
3 skeins Araucania Ruca in Blues and Purples
3 skeins Araucania Ruca in Slate Grey
3 skeins Alpaca With a Twist Temptation in Purple Phlox
12 skeins Berocco Pure Merino Heathers in Plum Burgundy
2 skeins Mouzakis Butterfly Super 10 in red
2 skeins Jojoland fingering weight pure Cashmere in Burgundy
1 skein Jojoland Gavotte in Opal Grey
6 skeins Knitpicks Gloss Lace in Bare (for hand dying)
3 skeins Knitpicks Gloss Lace in Sterling
3 skeins Knitpicks Chroma Worsted in Midwinter
8 skeins Knitpicks Wool of the Andes in Cloud
3 skeins Knitpicks WotA in Cadet
3 skeins Knitpicks WotA in Currant
4 skeins Lorna's Laces Green Line worsted in Cool
3 skeins LL's Green Line Worsted in Carol Green (which is just an ugly color for me, and will be overdyed)
3 skeins LL's Green Line Worsted in Nicole's 1st Anniversary
3 skeins LL's Green Line Worsted in Sage
2 skeins Madelinetosh Pashmina in Mourning Dove (yarn that is beyond beautiful!)
2 skeins Madelinetosh Merino Light in Norway Spruce
2 skeins Madelinetosh Merino Light in Blackcurrant
2 skeins Madelinetosh Merino Light in Oxblood
2 skeins Madelinetosh Merino Light in Fjord
1 skein Madelinetosh Merino Light in Baltic
1 skein Madelinetosh Merino Light in Thunderstorm
3 skeins Skacel Merino Lace in Jewel Green
2 skeins Skacel Merino Lace in Lilac

Thinking back, I probably should have realised I had a problem, when I got the second group of Itata Multy that I didn't remember ordering (althought it's lovely and discontinued and not going back).

Oh, and I also got several thousand yards of laceweight silk from India in four different colors (natural, pale blue, pale purple and black), but those will take a few weeks to get here. Yes, it was dirt cheap ($80 for all of it, including shipping), and no, I don't really want to tell you where I found it (although I might if you beg hard enough)- mostly because I'm selfish and I don't want to have to compete against anyone else should I need more.

I also bought a few knitting notions (extra needle tips, cables, stitch markers, etc), patterns, and while I was at it (and still under budget), I decided to try an electric ball winder. This largely stems from the fact that winding all my several thousand yards of silk is very hard on the body. Plus, they claim that you can use it to combine two or three strands together to get a thicker yarn. This is what I would like to do with my Scalamandre silk thread, which is really a little too fine for me to knit with. The winder hasn't arrived yet, but I'm hoping it will work. I know they've gotten mixed reviews, but from what I've read, it should meet my needs. I'll still use my handcrank for small skeins or heavy yarns. I'll let you all know how this works when I get it.

Although now, looking at that list and seeing it in black and white, I'm really reconsidering posting this. It seems like it might border on unwise. Oh well. It's not like any of you know where I live (okay, well, technically, Susie did get my address for the Christmas card swap, and I suppose there's a minuscule chance she might still have it, but I doubt she'd actually travel transcontinental to either have me locked up or raid my stash {both are very real fears right now}- plus, pretty much all flights on the east coast have been cancelled. I'm probably safe)

My Knitting Mojo Has Abondoned Me

2011-01-30T18:37:00.000-08:00

Warning- this is an extremely long post about a day gone horribly awry in knitting. It might bore you non-knitters, and cause sympathy pains/traumatic flashbacks for those of you who know or understand my pain.

I literally have not had this many things go wrong in one day since I taught myself to knit. It all started Friday, when I recieved my Berooco Pure Merino Heathers (12 beautiful skeins in plum burgundy). Now, this yarn is listed as an Aran weight. Aran my ass.

See, I looked at this yarn, and it was just begging to be a Coin Lace and Cable wrap (you might remember the ones I made here and here). So I grab my 6mm needles, the same as I used for my other two, and cast on. Only, as I'm working this, something isn't right. I start to realise that the reverse stockinette in between the coin lace repeats and the cable repeats is loose. Really loose. Loose like that one cheerleader in highschool everyone talked about behind her back. I also start to notice that my yarn doesn't feel heavy enough. At first I thought it was just because it was a much softer wool than the Elann Peruvian Highland I made my last one with, but I quickly began to reconsider this opinion. So I decide the only to do is put it aside until after school, when I was already going to be stopping by my LYS (I needed another skein of Fino for my Firmaments shawl, and I had to drop my car off for servicing, and the car place is halfway to the yarn store- follow that logic?)

So I go in to see my ladies, and in between finding several lovely yarns to go with my Fino, they take a look and agree- the yarn is not aran, and needs a needle two to three sizes smaller. I leave with my new yarn booty, and a strong sense of satisfaction over being right. However, I only got as far as ripping out, because I have a math test I've had to study for, and don't touch my needles for two days. Let's fast forward to today...

So I've finished all my studying, I've worked out, I've put away my laundry and cleaned the kitchen- in short, I've earned my knitting time. So I change my needle size down to 4.5mm, and this time (on the advice of my wise yarn store lady), I knit a test swatch just of the cable, since that's the part that was looking really bad. Just to be on the safe side, I do one repeat on a 4.5, and then right on top of it, I do a repeat on a 5.0, so I can compare. The 4.5mm looks better, so I cast on all 94 stitches again (oh yeah, did I forget to mention that dropping my needle size meant having to do the math so I could add more repeats? That sucked). I start knitting it up, and something's not quite right. But I can't put my finger on it. So I do another repeat, and there it is- the needle size might be right for the cable, but it's too small for the coin lace to show properly. So I rip out, change to the 5m, and start all over. Except that while the 5 is big enough for the coin lace, it's too big for the cable. What the fuck?! How the hell .5mm is making such a difference, I'll never know. Anyway, I give up. I throw in the towel, and say that no matter how much I love the yarn and its color, it's meant to be something else.

So I start looking through my pattern books, and think, "hey! This would make a great garter stitch triangle". It's an old standby, a favorite I've been wanting to make in a heavier yarn. So I start that, get two repeats in, and see that I was wrong. The tight twist of the yarn is making the lace pattern look funny. So I rip that out. And then I think that maybe, just maybe, this is the yarn to make my trinity-stitch shawl with seed stitch border I've wanted.

See, the problem with this stitch-which I've been dying to make for a year- is that it must have a small gauge. If it's too big, you lose the pattern. So you either have to knit it on really tiny needles with a lightweight yarn, or you need a bigger yarn. So I start knitting (a swatch, because frankly, I've learned my lesson by now). And what happens? You guessed it! Something was wrong. Actually, two somethings were wrong. First, the 5mm were too big- I was going to have to go down to a 4mm. And second, the yarn- this beautiful, beautiful yarn that is exactly my favorite color that looks fabulous on me- is too dark to show the pattern properly.

Now, my knitting friends know what I'm talking about. If any of you non-knitters are still somehow with us here (and really, I doubt it), you're probably confused, wondering how a color can keep you from seeing a pattern. You are going to just have to take my word for it. I can't explain why it happens- it just does. So I've given up. I rewound the yarn, put it all in a (very large) ziplock, and put it in the closet. At some point, I will find the perfect project for it. But today is not that day.

So now you're thinking that all is well, I've picked up another project, and I'm happily knitting away, right? Wrong. I went to my Lacy Prairie Shawl that I've had on the needles for a few days, and started working on that. So I look at my row counter, and it says 33. But I look at the stitches, and it was not a patter row (as row 33 would have been). It's a plain knit row, meaning a wrong side row, meaning that it must have been row 34, and I forgot to click the counter, right? Wrong again. I start knitting, and after about 20 stitches of the pattern (this is not counting the 11 stitch garter border), I start to realise my pattern rows are not lining up. I must have finished row 32, and the counter clicked when my bag got tossed around in my car on the way home from school. So I start trying to unknit very carefully, except this is a pain, because every other stitch is a S2K1PSSO. Which are a bitch to unknit- I think we can all agree. And as I'm very painstakingly trying to unknit and put my stitches right way around, I drop one. And because the pattern alternates, it doesn't drop all the way down, where I could pick it up and fix it. Noooo. It drops down to the next repeat, where it's caught in another cluster of repeats, and I can't pick it up. And since I'd done so few repeats, of course I did not have a lifeline in. So I had to rip out. At this point, I couldn't face the thought of casting on again. Not for the fourth time in one day (it really didn't matter that it's a different yarn). So I rewound that ball, put those in a bag, and walked away.

Oh, and I also discovered earlier today that the book that taught me how to wrap and turn for short rows taught me wrong, which is why the wedge scarf I'm making looks all wrong. I'll be having to rip that out, as well. I will not be knitting anymore tonight. I am going to wind yarn, and comfort myself my fondling it. I may not look at needles for days.

Okay, so I suck at this

2011-01-27T07:12:00.000-08:00

I swear, every day I wake up with the best of intentions for this blog. I mean to post. I intend to post. And then somehow things just go wrong. So for now, I'm just doing a lightning round, and will start making more of an effort next week.

The start of school has been a little rocky, and that's taken most of my time. Both my classes use software-different software than the other, I'd like to point out- and we've been having problems with those. It took days to get the math stuff straightened out, and while it now is, it caused me to be several days behind in math. Fortunately for me, we're doing review these first two weeks, so I was okay in the end. The problems with Blackboard- the software for my polisci class- are still ongoing. It's getting very frustrating for everyone, including my teacher.

I finished my Sweet Embrace, and also a second Simplicty Triangle shawl. I start the Lacy Prairie Shawl for myself (the first one I made went to Sej), and on the first, I'll be starting the Firmaments shawl as a KAL on one of my Rav boards. I'm also participating in the 11 Shawls in 2011 challenge, and the Firmaments will be my February contribution (the Simplicity Triangle was January's).

I very happily bought a crapload of yarn on clearance, which I will ~~brag~~ blog about once it all arrives. Since I ordered for a whole bunch of different sites, it's all coming at staggered times. I've also promised myself that I will organise my yarn storage system (better known as my mom's unused dresser), and to help with this, I've ordered a few boxes of very large Ziploc baggies. They are something like 3 gallons, and should help significantly. I have a vague oraganizational plan that I'm certain will refine itself once I actually put it in use. Alternately, this could be a big, fat lie I'm telling myself to feel better, but hey! either way, it's a plan.

I have to go get ready for school now, so my teachers can fill my head with something other than mush. I also have a math test to study for the next few days. It's probably a good thing I have to take my car in because it's acting funny, thus ensuring I will be at home to study. I have a short in my wiring that's causing my headlights to turn off everytime I turn on my indicator lights. It also shuts off my dash lighning, so it's kind of bad. And she seems to be drifting a bit, and her tires feel funny when I'm breaking. I'm sure these precise and technical descriptions will be extremely helpful to the technicians.

So I leave you with the pictures of my recent finished objects, and a promise to try harder to keep up with this thing.

Here's my Sweet Embrace. I have to wear her as a scarf, both because she's too small to be a wrap on me, and because I screwed up the grafting.

And here's my new Simplicity, just for me. I'm still trying to decide whether to block it or not.

Monday Matriculations....

2011-01-17T19:38:00.000-08:00

Are on hold this week, as my classes don't start until tomorrow. So I thought I'd take a moment to tell you about my doctor appointment, and the incredible thing the medical assistant said to me (that's not a "wow, that's amazing" incredible, it's an "I can't believe you just fucking said that to me" incredible).

I saw my neurologist for the first time today. The appointment itself went pretty well, and the wait beforehand was actually very short- although unpleasant thanks to the very old pissy woman who wouldn't stop yelling at the staff, and the man sitting a few chairs over who clearly had some mental health problems.

Oh, and the medical assistant who called me back and took my vitals? As she was reading my chart, she noticed that I was a student, and asked what my major was (I'd like to take a moment here to point out that she was younger than me, not some really old woman). When I told her I was prelaw, do you know what she had the nerve to say? "Well, no one's going to want to marry you now! You're too smart, and you're going to be too old when you're done". I swear to all the gods in the Greek pantheon she actually said this, and said it with all seriousness. Her tone was horrified, and the too smart thing? Not a compliment- trust me. I didn't even know how to respond. Did I somehow knock myself unconscious and wake up in 1954? As if in this day and age all women are supposed to care about is getting married, and that I was going to scare off all the eligible men with my terribly frightening law degree (that I'm years away from having), and my clearly advanced age (I'm 29, damn it. I'll only be in my mid 30s when I graduate). It was quite possibly the most ridiculous thing anyone has said to me in quite some time.

Anyways, I'm going to have to have some tests, starting with basic blood work to rule out some basics (like lupus, although I have no symptoms of lupus). He's also ordered a glucose tolerance test, just to make sure I'm not diabetic, although I have no symptoms of that, either, and frankly, with the way I've been know to binge on chocolate, I'd have been comatose by now if I were. The reason he's running these seemingly useless tests is because he'll have to justify the cost of the tests he actually needs to run to my insurance company. It's not really a bother, but I'm going to have to miss math on Friday for the glucose test. It's two hours long and must be done fasting, so I really need to do it first thing in the morning.

We've already scheduled a nerve test for a couple of weeks from now. This will most likely be the first test that tells us anything. It uses an electrical current to measure the nerves. It's going to tell us I have neuropathy, which we know, but apparently it can't be listed as an actual condition until this particular test is run (medicine is just full of stupid rules). After that, if all the other blood work and stuff come back as normal- which he suspects it will-he'll do an MRI.

He can say without a doubt that I have fibromyalgia, which we'd already figured out. There is a chance it could be causing my other symptoms, but it's unlikely. It is a fairly strong possibility that I have MS like my mother (can I just have the fibro, please?). The problem is that there is no definitive test for MS- they have to rule out everything else first. But my symptoms fit that more than anything. I declined the offer of any medication until we run the tests, seeing as how I'm not a big fan of pharmecuticals. If the tests don't tell us anything definite, I'll have to cave, because I really do need some kind of pain med if I want to get through college. The only reason I started looking into what's wrong with me after four years is because the pain started distracting me during class.

Because of a few of the issues I've been having, he's limited what I can do working out. The bicycle I wanted to get is absolutely out of the question. He doesn't want me using my elliptical machine :( on account that I've fallen off it twice. He would like me to replace it with a treadmill. Unfortunately, I don't have the money to buy a treadmill, so that's out. And so long as I'm careful and leave lots of room around me, I can use my Wii. I'm looking forward to that. The key to keeping myself working out is to keep myself interested.

In related weightloss news, I'm taking a new approach. I've only lost 15 pounds since August, and although it's better than nothing- really, I know it is-, I'm still rather frustrated. I failed to make time to work out during the semester, and I've still been eating a few too many sweets. So instead of keeping a food log, I'm going to keep a food journal. As in, I'm actually going to use it as a journal. I'm going to put pictures in it, starting from anything I have from my highest weight, to more recently. Then, once a month, I'm going to take a new picture, and put it in there. I'm hoping this will help me see the difference, as I certainly can't when I look in the mirror. Then I'll be using the front side of each page to write down what I ate and when, and the back side of the page to actually write what I'm feeling and what's going on everytime I feel the urge to eat.

On the first page of my journal, I'm making a list of all the reasons I want to lose weight- and it can be anything. Obviously, my health is the first reason (particularly if I'm going to spend the rest of my life with a debilitating disease). But I'm not ashamed to say I'm throwing some vanity issues in there, as well. I'm sick of being fat. It's not a self esteem issue- trust me. I think I'm prefectly pretty. But I'm sick of clothes not fitting well, and paying more for them, and well, frankly? some of them are just plain ugly. I hate it. I'm also throwing "Europe" towards the top of that list as well. Again, it's half practical/half vanity. I'm saving for a trip to Europe in a year or two. And I know for a fact that you walk a lot of places over there, particularly as a tourist (can I call myself a visitor instead? Tourist sounds so... I don't know what it sounds like, but I don't like it). I'd like to be able to walk around without feeling like I'm going to die. And on the vanity side of things, I don't want to be one of the "fat americans" people make fun of (don't tell me they don't- I have friends in England, Ireland and the Netherlands, and they all admit).

Here's the thing I finally realised: I don't care why I do it- I just care that I do. Who the hell ever said my motives have to be pure? So if I need to write in my journal that I walked away from the pan of brownies because I want to fit in my size 16 jeans, then that's what I'll do. If some other day it happens to be that I walk away from them because I'm having a bad pain day and it reminds me that I clearly have some sort of terrible disease? Well, they're both effective. I'll take whatever works that particular day.

WIP Wednesday

2011-01-12T18:47:00.000-08:00

I've promised myself that every Wednesday- barring heavy homework days- I will write about doing something that could be considered artistic. This may be (most likely) my knitting, or it could be writing, or painting, or even cooking (which I've been doing more of).

Today you get, as you usually will, knitting and yarn fun. First up, pictures of the monster shawl that I ~~bitched about~~ mentioned over the weekend. It's finished and blocked, and frankly, gigantic. Now, normally, I name my knitting projects after music. My first one of this pattern was called (It's A Wonderful Night For A) Moondance. I was going to stick with that, and call this one Moondance II, but after how long the damn thing went on, I offer you Atreyu:

It's very large- 82" in diameter, and that's not fully blocked. I didn't have room to fully block it. It would probably stretch to close to 90". And that's after cutting out 25 rows in chart three- which I'm very glad I did.

Now I'm doing a KAL over on SK's group, her Sweet Embrace wrap. I haven't gotten much done yet- well, that's not true. I had a repeat and a half done, only to decide that the beads I'm using in place of the nupps weren't visible enough, and ripped out to start over. Of course, I didn't have a lifeline in, so I had to rip back carefully, because I didn't want to redo my flawless first chart (I was smart enough to place a lifeline after I got everything picked up and placed properly again). Now, just to be on the safe side, I'm placing a lifeline at the end of every repeat. This is what she looks like so far:

I'm using Elann's Peruvian Baby Lace Merino, and it's absolutely lovely. I'm also using size six czech seed beads, and they are adding a lovely weight to it. It's going to be fabulous once it's finished.

Now entering the realm of Yarn Porn:

I just got some Malabrigo Sock in Boticelli Red to make something special for my sister this year (it's her 20th anniversary of sobriety, so I figure that warrants a gift). I'll use it as part of my 7 Small Shawls by Romi. My goal is to do each one in a different color of Malabrigo Sock. I have Cote d'Azure for Merope, Persia for Celano, Eggplant for Maia, and black for Elektra. That covers the first four already published. I'm going to use either Aguas or Solis for number 5, the Boticlli for number 6, and I'm thinking Stonechat for number 7, but I won't be sure until the patterns are actually published. At this point, they are only designed, and still have to be test knit by someone other than Romi.

I wasn't sure if I was going to like the red, but it turned out lovely, and is exactly the color my sister would pick for herself.

I also got a couple skeins of bulky weight mohair- Nashua Creative Knits Kid Mohair- in white, that I'm using to make a super-fluffy garter scarf. It's my current take-along project.

And I got some sinfully lovely and soft laceweight cashmere- pure cashmere. 400 yards. It was a bit pricey ($30), but I just loved it, so I got one skein. I was going to pair it with the aforementioned mohair, but since the mohair was a chunky weight, that wasn't going to work. I'm going to have to test swatch for gauge (something I never do), and I'm going to use the cashmere to make the Lost In Translation Scarf. I've made it before (thankfully with acrylic), but it fell victim to the cats. I've been wanting to make another one, just in a lighter weight yarn (my first was worsted). I'm also contemplating saving up for another skein or three and getting enough to make a Lost in Translation shawl, which I've also wanted to do for about a year. But that's a lot of money, and it would have to be a special occasion shawl, so I've not decided yet.

And finally, to wrap things up with, I played with overdying. I took that super-hideous yarn Nix sent me for Christmas- here's a picture to remind you-

Yup, six skeins of that, boys and girls. It doesn't look so bad in the picture here, but it's really, really, REALLY not my shade of blue. So I did exactly what Nix intended me to do- dyed it. Did you know that as long as you are using silk, nylon or some form of wool that you can use food coloring and vinegar to dye? Yup. It won't work on most synthetics (nylon is the exception), but works fabulously on protein fibers (sheep's, alpaca's, camel's, ect. wool and silk). So using red to over dye, I got this fantastic mottled purple.

Now I have six skeins of that! I'm madly in love with it. It was also great fun. Now I know what to do when I find a yarn I love with a color I hate.

Tuesday Reviews

2011-01-11T19:01:00.000-08:00

As easy as it would be for me to wax ecstatic about my new phone, I'll behave myself and review all those movies I've been watching lately... while I still remember anything about them. Since there are so many, I'm picking the ones I rented at my sister's, and will keep each one very brief.

The Town: Starring Ben Affleck, Jeremy Renner, Jon Hamm.

Description: A modern version of the classic heist/bank robbery films, only this one covers four jobs instead of one big one. Things are going pretty smoothly for our bad guy protagonists, until Affleck's character starts up a relationship with a woman they had taken hostage, and decides he wants out.

My take? Absolutely awesome. Great plot, tight writing (it's based on a Denis Lehane book, so no surprise there), fantastic action sequences, and brilliant performances, especially from Jeremy Renner. I loved this one so much that I not only watched it twice- I didn't even knit through it. My eyes were glued to the screen the whole time. I can't recommend it enough if you like crime dramas.

Salt: Starring Angelina Jolie, Liev Schriber

Description: Jolie plays a CIA agent who's accused of being a Russian spy. That's pretty much the whole thing.

My take? Completely predictable from start to end, but the stunts were fun to watch. I wouldn't go out of my way to see it again, but neither would I go out of my way to avoid it (like Titanic, to which there is no end to the measures I will take to never have to see it again). I wouldn't really recommend it, unless you are a really big fan of one of the stars, and you don't mind losing a couple hours of your life to mindless predictability.

Knight And Day: Starring Tom Cruise, Cameron Diaz

Description: A woman gets mixed up with a government agent who may or may not be what he seems.

My take? Despite a plot that's been done to death, this one was far more enjoyable than I was expecting. Yes, I saw most of it coming, but it was really funny, and Cruise never does an action sequence halfway. I would actually recommend this one for a night on the couch with some popcorn when you just want to be entertained.

EatPrayLove: Starring Julia Roberts, Javier Bardem

Description: After leaving her unhappy marriage, a woman embarks on a transcontinental spiritual journey.

My take? I was so bored, I wanted to stab myself in the eyes with my knitting needles. I really wanted to like it. I wanted to be able to appreciate Julia Robert's attempt at a grownup movie, a movie that wasn't a romantic comedy. But it just didn't work for me. I don't remember if I read the book, so I can't say how much of it stayed true, but I would hope the book was more interesting. By the time she was in India, I kept hoping she'd fall off a roof- at least that would be interesting. To me, all her conversations about how she was trying to find meaning mostly just came across as whining. And she still ended up with the hot guy at the end. If you want a departure from the Julia Robert's standard, check out 2004's Closer instead. I could not, in good conscience, recommend this to anyone- but if the premise really appeals to you, give it a try. You might like it more than me.

Matriculation Monday

2011-01-10T20:50:00.000-08:00

In keeping with my new themes, I offer up Matriculation Mondays, where I will talk about school and various school-related things.

My classes don't start until a week from tomorrow, so there's not much to say yet.

I'm taking another poli-sci class (the last I can take here at my junior college), and the dreaded MAT120- aka Intermediate Algebra, aka The 10th Circle of Hell Dante Wasn't Brave Enough To Cover. I was going to be brave (braver than Alighieri, anyways), and take on a third class, but was strongly advised against it, given my particular difficulties with math. And since it was Smallfry who warned me off (and she thinks I can do pretty much anything, much more than I am actually capable of), I dropped the English class I was already registered for. Word has it that this class is actually harder than the class after it. They call MAT140 "the reward for surviving 120". I was suitably horrified, and now live in a perpetual state of fear. Thank the Goddess Isis the other class I'm taking I could sleep through and still pass with an A.

I'm taking my Poli-sci a little out of order. Most people would start with 110, then go to 121, 122, and 123. I started with 121 and 122, because I was originally an education major, and those classes are required by the state of Arizona if you want to be a teacher. It was in 122 that Toni, my teacher, lured me to the dark side. Then I ended up taking 123 on the advice of Toni, because we could guarantee that I would get a good teacher- Terri, whom I absolutely loved (Toni retired after last spring-despite my best efforts- so that's why I couldn't have her). I will have a new teacher this semester, as Terri doesn't teach it.

Looking back at this past year, I'm not a little surprised at how well it turned out. I never thought myself to be one for college, and put it off for years (taking care of the 'rents made it easier to avoid). When I started last spring, I didn't think I'd survive. But here I am, two semesters later- one with a 4.0 GPA, and one with a 3.6. I somehow got out of math alive, and discovered a real knack - nay! a passion!-for poli-sci. I can only assume that finding something I'm actually good at has made the difference (since I don't seem to be able to make a living off knitting or singing jazz). I can only hope it will sustain me through all the classes I have absolutely no interest in but have no choice but to take.

In other good news, my school loans have been reinstated, and in a few short weeks, I'll be able to pay my mother back the money I owe her for covering my classes last semester. I really hate owing anyone money (the reason I operate on a cash only basis for pretty much my entire life). I'm going to put aside a bunch of it to pay for summer classes. I'm going to have to start going over the summer to help make up for the fact that I'm only going part time right now. Once I'm done with math, I'll be going up to a full semester (possibly next semester, as Smallfry says it's easier). There's not too many classes I'm willing to take over summer, because I think squeezing 16 week classes down to 5 weeks is really stupid, but some classes are easy enough I can manage it.

I still don't know what I'll be having to take totally, but I have a lot of it mapped out, and I've got a good plan for the next year or so. I like having a good plan. It makes me feel like I can bullshit my way through anything.

Personal Progress

2011-01-09T14:17:00.000-08:00

Many of you know that I suffer from Mysophobia (germophobia to the average layman). And if you didn't, you do now. Many people will tell you that I also have Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder, but this is not actually true. People with OCD are forced by their own minds to do certain things to maintain order in their lives. I just have to wash my hands a lot to get rid of the germs. It's because I'm terrified of getting sick-it has nothing whatsoever to do with maintaining order. I also have to wash my counters frequently, make sure my food is ridiculously well cooked (it's usually over done, to be honest), and I also can't eat food other people have touched, unless I have watched them wash their hands thoroughly. There is one exception to this: Smallfry (because she's nearly as anal as I am, and I know damn well she washes her hands- the benefit of being best friends with someone for 17.5 years).

Some of this may seem to be completely irrational, but I promise you , it stems from a very real place. The don't-touch-my-food thing? That comes from my family, who have some really disgusting habits (my sister used to change my niece's diaper without washing her hands- she is permanently banned from my kitchen). Some of it is completely irrational- I remember how I used to snack on fries driving home from McDonalds when I was younger, something I'm completely incapable of doing now.

I'm a lot better than I used to be. At one point several years ago, I couldn't even pet my cats without having to go wash my hands. I hardly ever touched them- it must have been very lonely for them. I don't have to do this anymore (although I will admit to this- if their paws touch my mouth, I have to go wipe it off with an alcohol wipe. That thing's been in a litter box, and I can only change so much).

This all started back when I was 21. The short version is that I got sick and lost my job. I ended up in bankruptcy (at 21!) because I couldn't find another job, and I'd missed so much work I was already months behind on my bills. This was very traumatic, and launched the whole issue. This is frequently the way it works. I was actually a vegetarian for a few years, because the phobia was so bad I was perpetually afraid of food poisoning (yes, I know that 50% of food poisoning cases each year come from fruits and veg- I didn't know that at the time, which was good for me). Until recently, I haven't fixed anything that involved using canned food for six years, because a friend was hospitalised with botulism and nearly died (what? I said I know some of it's irrational).

If you're still reading this, and wonder what the point is, here you go: I'm tired of feeling like a freak who's afraid of everything. Frankly, it's exhausting. So I've been making an effort. I've been making an effort to lighten up. I've made dinner every night for the past week without washing my hands 15 times (just before the prep, and after handling any raw meat or eggs). There was an incident where I was trying to chop cooked chicken sausage with my new food processor, and discovered after I had removed the outer pieces and put them on a counter that I hadn't used the right blade, and had to reassemble it with the other blade. And I did it. Did I mention I had put it on the counter already? That's a big, big step for me. And nothing bad happened. And what did I do whilst grocery shopping today? Bought canned pears, bitches- that's what I did. I've also cooked with canned stuff three times now.

These may seem like really simple things for most people, but they are really big steps for me. Oh- and I also left the house after eating the other day, which is something else I never used to do, but that's a whole nother story with a whole nother neurosis.

Part of the reason I am doing this is because I realise on an intellectual level that I can't keep living my life this way. It's really no fun at all. And I also believe quite strongly that my germ-related food issues are part of the reason I'm still so overweight. It's pretty much impossible to eat low-calorie and heathy when you only eat pre-packaged processed crap.

I really think there should be prizes for things like this.

Surfacing

2011-01-07T18:04:00.000-08:00

Okay- So I realise I've been AWOL for a while. I was... what's the word I'm looking for here?... lazy. That's right- I was being lazy. I just hit a wall, and didn't feel like doing much of anything. Plus, I was at my sister's for about 10 days, which always requires my laptop being set up on her sofa, and frankly, I'd like to see all of you try to type for any length of time like that (but my apologies to my blogger friends whose blogs I've been failing to comment on). And I've got this monster shawl project I've been working on that's a major time-suck. I believe it might actually be knitting up into a worm-hole.

My holidays were lovely- I spent Christmas with my best friend and her family. Fun was had by all. Also had? Really good food (because Smallfry and I can freakin' cook, y'all).

I still haven't ventured much back into the world of politics- I've been too busy knitting and watching Law and Order: Criminal Intent. I'm taking a break to watch my dvd of Swingtown (a really great show from a couple years ago that only last 13 episodes).

Speaking of watching thing, I rented several movies whilst I was at my sister's, and I'll be reviewing soon. Oh, and I read some books- which was awesome (mostly because I've finally discovered a way to knit and read at the same time- my Kindle!)

I've been thinking about- and have now decided on- that I will be assigning topics for my weekday blogs. This stems from several comments from my friends that my blogs either contain too much politics, too much knitting talk, or too much lull-time. The system works really well for Kendall over at The Pitt of Despair. I haven't quite worked out what each day will be, but I'm thinking things like doing Tuesday Reviews (where I will review movies, music or books), Work-In-Progess Wednesday (which I'm totally stealing from Susie), which will be knitting and other creative things, Fridays will probably be Random Roundups. I'll throw politics in there somewhere- I'm guessing Thursdays, and I still have to think of something for Mondays (maybe school-related things?). I'll be implementing this start Monday.

In the meantime- my knitting trauma...

So I'm working up this shawl, right? I made a version of it a few months ago (it's called the Artemis). At the time, I swore I was never going to make one again- largely due to the fact that at row 105, you end up putting 1152 stitches on your needles. This continues until the bind off- at row 177. My first attempt was very pretty, but was seriously altered because I didn't have enough yarn. I decided to skip the cresent moon that's in chart three, and just work the pattern all the way around. I also only did this for so many rows, because I was running out of yarn. It worked out nicely my way, but it was lacking. I also discovered that the yarn was not a good match, because I couldn't block it very hard at all, and the points didn't take (I've since frogged it for use in a more suitable project).

So cue up to my birthday, and Nix sends me this truly beautiful yarn. It's laceweight from Knitpicks, and it's in the perfect shade of night-sky blue. And he made sure to send me enough to make the whole thing- 2640 yards. And in the admittedly short amount of time since I made the first one (five months), I'd all but forgotten the trauma of making the first one, and decided to jump head-first into making another one- only this time, I would make the whole pattern, and I would add beads (because it just wasn't fucking crazy enough to begin with).

Well, the beginning of it went really well. Except it didn't seem to be quite big enough. So I switched from 5mm needles to 5.5 mm. And it still didn't seem big enough, so as indicated by the pattern, I exercised the optional "repeat rows 80-93 for added diameter" once. Maybe twice. I can't actually remember now. And then I moved on, because you are actually at row 103 when you finish this (don't ask, just look up the pattern if you are curious). And then next thing I know, I'm knitting 1152 row after row after row after motherfucking row (in case you are not a knitter, or perhaps a less-crazy knitter than myself who has never attempted this and so therefore has no way of knowing, it takes about an hour to knit 1152 stitches). And I'm being faithful to the pattern. I truly am. I even did a crapload of math and devised a system to figure out the easy way to count to the knit stitches in the centerish parts (again, don't ask). And I'm knitting. And I'm knitting some more. And I'm still knitting (I would like to point out that I started this project on December 19). And I get to row 137, and I notice that I'm just about down to my last two balls of yarn. And I get a bit worried. So I go and do my measure-and-math system that I use to figure how many rows I will get out of the yarn I have left. And by my calculations- I will run out in the middle of my bind off (I'd like to remind you- 2640 YARDS of yarn)

Of course, the yarn was a gift, so it came with no tags, and Nix threw them out, and we can't remember the color or the dyelot, so it would appear that we are shit out of luck for buying another skein. So I'm going to have to cut it a bit short. I decided to end chart three four rows early, and it shouldn't affect the pattern at all. This was my intention. I then picked up my knitting, knit to row 139 (did I mention I'm placing beads in every other repeat of the pattern sections every 12 rows?), and I, well... snapped. I just can't do it. I've been knitting for weeks now, on the same stupid pattern, and I was going to still have 40 more rounds. I just can't do it. I stopped chart three after row 140, and moved on. I'm throwing my knitting caution to the wind, saying to hell with it, and hoping the pattern isn't completely wonky- and even if it is, I'll fold that half on the inside when I wear it.

Oh, and did I mention it's gigantic? Already? I've got it on a 60 inch cable, and it bunches up for at least half the length, and it hangs down a good foot. It's supposed to be a shawl, but by the time I'm done, it could possibly be a tablecloth, a car cover, or a fumigation tent. The lesson here? Don't knit a shawl that has 1152 stitches. It's not healthy.

A Beautiful Day For Human Rights!

2010-12-18T14:41:00.000-08:00

It's official, boys and girls- Congress has voted to repeal Don't Ask Don't Tell. It only awaits the President's signature. It may take up to a year to get everything into effect, but the first, beautiful step has been taken.

This news totally makes up for the pain and agony of having to rip out a project 88 rows into it (and nearly done, too). I will no longer be drinking for consolation tonight, but rather in celebration.

Thank you Congress, for this Holiday miracle (except for you Grinches and Scrooges who voted against it- may you get coal in your stockings this year).

Christmas Cards, and an update

2010-12-13T20:13:00.000-08:00

So, a few weeks ago, a bunch of us followers of Useless Beauty all signed up for a card swap Susie started. She ~~bravely~~ brilliantly organised everything, got everyone's addresses, and handed them out amongst us, resulting in everyone getting a different person to send a card to. We could handmake them completely from scratch, or jazz up a store bought. Well, I got mine today. Not one, but two beautiful cards from Marushka, over at It Might Be A Metaphore.

Here are the really fantastic cards she sent (one for me, and one for a friend)

This one's mine

And this one will go to my Smallfry, with the shawl I'm making her (no, I don't worry about her seeing this. She never reads my blog- some best friend, huh?)

Aren't they just precious? Thank you so much, Marushka.

In other news, I finished both my finals today. Despite losing three days of study time because of my cold, I got a 91.3% on my math final. I'm very, very happy about that. Two months ago, I wasn't sure I was going to pass this class at all, let alone get an A on the final. I'm still waiting for my final grade, but it's no less than a B, so I'm in very good shape.

I've been feeling much better the last couple days, but post-cold sinus drainage has made me lose my voice completely. I can't even manage the ever-so-attractive croaking frog thing I had goin' on yesterday. But I've got a few weeks off, in which I intend to throw myself head first into knitting, West Wing, and reading marathons. I'll be doing WW first, as I need to finish my Christmas knitting. But then I'll be hitting those books (thank the gods I'm a fast reader).

And for now, I've got a cute kitty using me as a pillow, celebratory carrot cake (just one slice- don't want to set back all the hard work), and Poirot. I'm going to go enjoy the rest of my night.

Yarn Porn!

2010-12-10T19:33:00.000-08:00

Warning! This is a long, gratuitous post about my all the lovely things I recieved for my special day/early yule presents. It contains photos and comments about yarn.

Karen pointed out in her last e-mail to me that I haven't posted anything on what I got in the way of birthday booty. Since I'm much too sick and tired to do anything else, I thought I'd go ahead and do that. So brace yourself for possible yarn overload and/or jealousy.

Up first we have the group picture. This is everything laid out on the bed, except for the blocking mats and the sweaters- because honestly, my bed is only so big.

It's beautiful, isn't it? And almost too much to take in at once.

Next, we have the Elann Baby Silk in Cedar, bought specifically to make SK's Clover Leaf Stole.

Beautiful, no? I went to cast on for it last night, but my brain can't handle interpreting patterns right now.

Now we have the Elann Peruvian Baby Cashmere, in parchment, and the Silken Kydd in Winter White, as a package to make SK's Shining Bird's Eye. I can't wait to make it. I'm not sure if I'm going to use them together, or keep the Silken Kydd for my white Dancing Crane that I've wanted for months.

It's lovely to hold, too

It's just begging for the purple beads I bought.

And similarly, Elann Super Kydd in Gothic Grape (the difference is that the Silken has a silk core, and the Super has a nylon core). It's been discontinued, which I think is a shame. It's not quite as soft as the Silken Kydd, but it's still lovely

It looks black, but it's actually a dark purple- it just refused to show that, no matter how I tried to photograph it.

Next up: Elann Peruvian Highland Wool, in a multitude of colors. Two of them have already been used to make gifts, so I don't have much left.

In order, we have Mid Indigo Blue, Nutmeg Heather, Pewter and Charcoal Heather

It really is the loveliest "working horse" yarn I've ever used. It's sturdy, shows stitches unbelievably well, and blockes beautifully. It's a bit rough to work with, but it does soften with blocking.

Now, we move on the the KnitPicks lace, given to me curtesy of my beloved Nix. He got me six skeins of the Gloss Lace in Ultramarine, four skeins in Vineyard Heather, and six skeins of the Shadow Lace kettle-dyed in Aquamarine, which he strongly suspects I'll overdye because it's too bright for me (there's a damn good chance)

I've never tried their lace before, because I tried their sock yarn and didn't like it. But Nix swears by it, and it is quite soft to the touch (it's no alpaca with a twist, but it is much more affordable if you need large quantities).

And my very first Patons yarn. It's their Grace line- 100% mercerized cotton. It's going to be a gift for someone (I won't say who, because I never know when they might be reading my blog), because not only is the color NOT me, it's very her, and it's machine washable, which will make her very happy.

And now for the yarn I bought myself (textbook buybacks- best thing ever!)

Two skeins of Alpaca With A Twist Fino, in Poppies, just waiting for the right pattern

And Malabrigo Sock, one in Cote d'Azue, and one in Eggplant. These are destined to be two of Romi's 7 Small Shawls (although I may need to save and buy one more of each to be able to adjust the size to what I like)

And finally, some of the knitting notions I've been wanting: Locking Stitch markers, a 2.5mm 40" Knitpicks Harmony Needle (for knitting my hand-dyed silk), size 7 and 8 Harmony interchangable tips (for knitting yarn that's too slippery for my Option tips), a needle sizer (since my interchangables are *not* marked), a hanging row counter, and not featured in the picture (along with the 7 tips, as they are in a project bag) two sets of blocking mats, and two 60" cables for my needles (for working those very large MMario patterns), which I didn't want to try photographing.

It's all too beautiful, isn't it? Very nearly shameful. I love you all very much for buying me knitting stuff (I know very well you all took pity on the poor college student who can't actually afford a lot of yarn).

And my mom bought me five sweaters. Which are also lovely, and greatly appreciated (or would be if I needed them, except we're having a warm winter- stupid Arizona).

Dear Makers of Vicks, Ricola, and Breathe Right Nasal Strips

2010-12-09T16:16:00.000-08:00

I'd just thought I'd drop a note and let you know how much I appreciate your companies. See, I usually have no use for your products- I blithely pass them by in the stores, not really giving much thought to them. This is not a comment on your products or their quality, I assure you. It's just that I usually don't get sick. Naturally, when my throat started to hurt on Wednesday, I just assumed that I had failed to drink enough water, or perhaps spent too much time yelling at Congress on C-SPAN, and assured myself it was nothing more than a fluke. I'm sure you can understand my surprise when I awoke this morning with a throat so sore I can barely speak, a nose so stuffy I'm quite certain it's been filled with the high-grade insulation they use to combat Canadian winters, and a cough that makes me sound like a 60 year old lifetime smoker with emphysema.

I was faced with no choice. As soon as I could move (and it took a few minutes to make my aching body cooperate with that plan) I made a dash for my neighborhood chemist (desperate times, you see- I have finals in four days). Once there, the lovely people working there reintroduced me to your products. The lovely Ricola, which are both soothing and effective, without tasting like liver or being chock full of chemicals. The Vicks Vapo-Rub, which rather quickly restored my sense of smell, and enabled me to breathe partially through my nose again. I'm quite certain it could cure anything. Have you tried applying it to various skin conditions, or cancer? I'm really thinking you might have some luck there. And the Day-Quil? Lovely stuff, thank you. While it was not completely effective against the aches, pains, stuffiness and coughing, it took the edge off enough I could do some algebra (although I must confess, I passed on the Ny-Quil on principle; the little plastic shot glass it comes with made much more sense when it was still 80% alcohol). And the Breathe-Rights? I understand you're really only supposed to use them whilst sleeping, but I find breathing to be equally important during the day.

So again, thank you so much for you wonderful products. I hope I never need them again.

CJ Stuffynose

Politics Lightning Round

2010-12-05T17:59:00.000-08:00

So here's the deal- I've been sick as a dog, I'm tired, I've got finals in one week, and I'm trying to enjoy my freakin' holidays. I've also had about 600 emails on various political issues. So I'm going to do one post to cover as many of the topics as I ~~remember~~ can, and then I'm taking the rest of the holidays off. Because I like the holidays, and politics are making me cranky right now.

First up- Nix's questions about the Prop 8 hearing, also known as Perry v Schwartzenegger. To refresh everyone, a couple of years ago, California started allowing gay marriage. This made some people very, very angry, and they passed a law amending the CA constitution to state that marriage is between a man and woman only. Two gay couples appealed this ruling as unconstitutional, and a Federal Judge in CA agreed. Now, an appeal is being filed against the ruling. This is what the hearing this week will be about.

The main issue here is whether the people appealing have standing. Standing means that the person bringing suit must be able to show that they have been or will be personally harmed by the court's decision. The reason there is so much question about the standing is the nature of who filed the appeal. The court's decision was actually made against the state of CA, because the suit was brought against the state of CA. The state of CA, however, is not who filed the appeal- it was the proponents of Prop 8 who filed the appeal. But since they were not involved in the original case, and the judgement was not made against them, it's widely believed that they technically have no standing. Hopefully that answers your questions, Nix, and we'll see how everything goes this week at the hearing (I will probably do an update on that)

Second- The blocking of tax cuts for the middle class and blocking of the vote to extend unemployment benefits because the Democrats don't want to extend the tax cuts for the wealthy. Well, are we really surprised by this? Okay, I was surprised by the four dems and Joe Leibermann who voted against the measures- shame on you all.

Here's my issue- everyone is bitching about the deficit. Everyone is bitching about the economy. Everyone is bitching about how we are going to get things under control and back to normal. But then the Republicans want to add to the deficit? Which is exactly what the tax cuts for the wealthy will do. And in the meantime, until they get what they want, they are willing to screw over all the people who don't have jobs, and subsequently add to the ever-rising homeless population (oh, and by the way, Mr. Senator from Wyoming? That 9.8% unemployment you were griping about? It does not affect the wealthiest 3% of the country. You're reasoning is lame). It is my opinion (note- my opinion, as in belonging only to me) that the Republicans care only about making their large campaign contributors happy, and to hell with the rest of the country, despite the fact that they represent the rest of the country, regardless of whether those people voted for them or donated money to their campaigns. This is NOT what was intended when the Congress was designed, I assure you. And I have this whole big opinion about how there's too much money behind politics, but that's a story for another year.

Third- Screw you, Congress, for not passing the bill that would close the loopholes on the Fair Pay act. Nothing else would have said "we're chauvinist pigs who don't think women are as good as men" quite like that.

Fourth- Wikileaks. I have no opinion. I really don't care. Please stop asking me. And Palin- it's not treason. He's not American.

And that, boys and girls, is all I have the energy for. I'm tired, and sick, and have yet to watch a single holiday movie, for politics has taken over my television. So, aside from following the Prop 8 stuff, I'm going on strike until after New Years.

Sometimes, You're Just Being A Dick

2010-12-04T23:29:00.000-08:00

Yes, John McCain, I'm talking about you.

So boys and girls, here's the thing. Waaaay back in 2006, John McCain (a Republican Senator from right here in my home state of Arizona), when questioned on the military policy of Don't Ask Don't Tell, stated that when the leaders of the military said it was time to repeal it he would vote to do just that. Jump forward the incredibly long four years to a few months ago. The fine leaders of our military (known as the Joint Chiefs of Staff) said that it was time to repeal DADT. And what did John McCain say? He said "whoa Nellie! Not so fast there. We should have a study or something before we do something this crazy". So jump forward the incredibly long time to just this last week. The military had conducted their study, they questioned service members, they gathered data. And what did that study find, I hear you asking? It found that most people just don't care anymore (the Marines apparently still care, but they're a special breed of asshole). So now you're thinking that the fine Senator McCain is just waiting for that vote now, just itching to repeal this ridiculous law, right? Well, my fine furry friends, you would be wrong.

John McCain is now saying that the study isn't good enough. He has issues with how it was done. Basically, John McCain has absolutely no intention of voting to repeal DADT. Now, Senator McCain has, in recent times, become the object of much ridicule for his now-famous flip-flopping. If there is an issue, he will have had a minimum of three different stances on it, I assure you. And for the most part, I don't care. I really don't. File it under "That's Politics, Baby". But it burns my ass- seriously burns my ass- to have such a well known, and well respected, member of the Senate who is so closely associated with the military, going back on his word to repeal an unconstitutional law that's entirely based on the fact that a bunch of people are raging homophobes.

The Lifeline

2010-12-01T18:36:00.000-08:00

Those of you who knit know exactly what I'm talking about. Those of you who don't knit- well, a lifeline is exactly what it sounds like. It's something you use to save you from sinking when knitting goes wrong.

Now, I normally only lifeline under three circumstances:

One (the most commonly used)- when I'm knitting with mohair. This is because mohair is a bitch to rip out. You basically have two options. You can freeze it to make the hairs stiff, and tink back. However, this can be time consuming if you need to tink more than a few stitches, because it doesn't take long for the mohair to warm in your hands, meaning you have to keep stopping and freezing. The other option is just to cut off the area that holds the mistake. This is where the lifeline is handy. You place lifelines at convenient places, and simply cut off right above it, then pick up the stitches, and resume knitting. When knitting mohair, I place lifelines about every 1/4 of the pattern repeats, ensuring that I never have to lose too much yarn.

Two (less frequent, but still happens)- when I am knitting something with a hell of a lot of stitches per round. I say "per round", because this rarely ever happens when I'm knitting in the flat. This nearly always happens when I'm knitting in the round, particularly when I'm knitting a pattern by MMario. One shawl- the Artemis- had 1152 stitches per round for at least 1/2 of the entire shawl, possibly more. Even though the pattern was pretty much the same for every round, I lifelined frequently, because frankly, tinking that many stitches would put me off knitting for a year.

Three (hardly ever happens, at least not that I'm willing to admit to)- when I am knitting something I keep screwing up. This is most frequently a simple pattern, that any monkey who possesses basic motor skills should be able to knit. I usually end up doing this after I've tinked for the fifth time. I don't like to talk about it. It's demoralizing.

Sadly, today's knitting fell under the third scenario. Actually, it started on Monday. I was working on my in-class knitting project, and when I got to the end of the row, my count was off. Since I only had a few minutes before class ended, I did a quick count of my stitches, and put it down. It's had multiples of threes, (knit three, yarn over, double decrease, yo), so it's usually easy to spot the mistake. I couldn't, so I put it down until class today. When class started, I tinked the row and knit it over. And had the wrong stitch count again. So while basically ignoring my class, I tried counting to find my mistake, only to discover that it wasn't on this row. My stitch count was perfect up until this point. So resigning myself, I waited until I got home to fix it. I had to tink back three rows- I had dropped a stitch when tinking the first time, and I had accidentally YO twice on the previous pattern row. It was crushing to my knitter's ego, but I persevered, and fixed the mistake. The sad thing is that this isn't the first time I've been off on my count and had to tink (although it was the first time it wasn't on the same row). So I cried uncle, declared my innate idiocy the winner, and placed a freaking lifeline. Just in case.

On the plus side, I hit the yarn jackpot yesterday. I got so much yarn, I was literally dizzy (oh, and some notions that I really needed) No, I did not buy these. They were gifts, for a certain yearly tradition.

I got:

6 skeins Elann Highland Wool in Pewter
3 skeins Elann Highland Wool in Charcoal
10 skeins Elann Highland Wool in Mid Indigo Heather
10 skeins Elann Highland Wool in Nutmeg Heather
3 skeins Elann Silken Kydd in Winter White
6 skeins Elann Baby Cashmere in Parchment
6 skeins Elann Super Kydd in Gothic Grape
9 skeins Elann Baby Silk in Cedar
4 skeins Knitpicks Shadow Lace in Vineyard Heather
6 skeins Knitpicks Shadow Kettle Dyed in Atlantic

I was also able to buy a few for myself with my textbook buyback money (I knew that pesky math book would come in handy)

1 skein Malabrigo Sock in Eggplant
1 skein Malabrigo Sock in Cote d'Azure
2 skeins Alpaca With A Twist Fino in Poppies

I'm a very happy knitter. Thinking about this will offset the pain and embarrassment of the lifeline issue.

Also, I want to learn to quilt. I think perhaps I need a craft intervention.

Randomness, Knitting Updates, and A Funny School Story

2010-11-24T16:36:00.000-08:00

I know I tend to forget to post these days- I'm sorry about that. It's just that finals are creeping up on us- only about three weeks now. On the bright side, the last couple chapters of math have been going better. I got a 98 on my last test (only missed one question, and that's because I worked it out two ways, couldn't choose between the answers, and flipped a coin- literally. One of my answers was right. I just chose the wrong one). I also got a 100% on my second paper, for which I am taking the day to feel smug.

In other school news, I single-handedly got the points on our extra credit assignments doubled. See, a couple weeks ago, I went to do a seemingly simple extra credit assignment (because you should always spend the time to do extra credit in a class you are already getting an A in, right?). The task was simple- pick a case from the US Supreme Court's current docket that relates to any of the issues we've been studying, and write a summary of it, including how you think the Court should rule. Simple, right? There was even a perfect case for it- Arizona School Tuition Tax Credit v Winn. Not only was it a case that started locally, but it's dealt with something we had actually covered- the Establishment Clause. This simple task turned into a six hour ordeal of research.

First I went and listened to the transcripts. Only I could not make sense of the arguments the lawyers were making. So I thought maybe it was from all the talking (it must get very confusing, because the Justices are always asking question in the middle of argument), so I went and printed out the transcripts to read. 58 pages later, I was still confused. So I ended up looking up the laws that were in question. I was still confused. So I then I looked up local news reports, to see if that explained anything better- they didn't. Finally, I ended up reading the 9th Circuit Court's decision (where this stems from), and finally understood what the issues were (**if anyone's interested, I'll explain in down below).

So I write up my paper and turn it in after class last Monday. Teri takes it, and sets it aside, and I stop to explain it to her, thinking I should warn her that she could get innundated with questions by anyone who wants to do this extra credit. As soon as I get to the part about having to read the 9th Circuit's opinion, she grabs my paper, and gives me all ten points, without so much as reading a word of it (yes, I laughed really hard). Then she tells me after class this Monday (after telling everyone that the extra credits are now worth 20 points each) that it's all because of me. She felt bad that she could only give me ten points, and that she doubled the points because of all the effort I put in. I'm thinking my fellow classmates should be building a shrine to me. Just sayin'.

In knitting news, which I'm equally smug about, I made this beautiful Brandywine (designed by the incredible and talented Romi). I love this pattern so much- it's beautiful, and actually pretty easy once I figured out the increases in chart B, and it knits up using only about 1 skein of sock yarn (mine used 94 grams of malabrigo, using size 9 needles, and came out about 65x32)

I love this so much, I'd happily knit it in every color of Malabrigo or Madelinetosh. It's definitely going to be a comfort knit. I'm working on a couple christmas presents right now, which I can't talk about, lest anyone read this and find out what they're getting. But I'm taking the next couple days off from knitting to get some reading done. Pleasure reading, not school reading. I believe it's the benefit of a four day weekend.

Friday, I'll be staying with my annual tradition. I'll put the tree together during the day, then later, I'll drink rum and cokes and decorate it (I always figure it's best to actually put it together while still sober). I should probably put the lights on before rum as well, since I almost never drink anymore and have no tolerance. It would suck to electrocute myself this close to the end of the semester.

So that's about it for now. I'll be back with my takes on some recent political stuff in a few days, but I want to enjoy my holiday first. Happy Thanksgiving to all my American friends, and to all my European friends- you don't know how lucky you are to get to avoid this holiday.

**so, for anyone who cares- the issue in the Court case I was reading is this: Arizona has a system in which, after your income tax liability is assessed (meaning how much you have to pay in income tax each year), you can choose to make a donation to a STO- a school tuition organization. You would then get a "credit" on what you owe. A STO provides scholarships to families who want to place their children in private school. STOs have to represent more than one school, although other than that there are no requirements about the schools the represent. For the record, 73% of private schools in AZ are religion based.

There are two issues the Court has to decide- the first is whether taxpayers (in this case, Winn) have legal standing to bring the suit. Standing means that you have to show that you have been or will be harmed by a law or action. Taxpayers generally do not have standing- the exception to this are cases that involve the Establishment Clause. For those who don't know/remember the Establishment Clause is the thing in the first amendment of the Constitution that says the government cannot establish an offical religion (this is the clause used to ban prayer in school). It is also the clause used to keep government money from going to religious causes. That's the second issue.

Winn is arguing that this is government money. For the record, I agree. It is not like other charitable contributions which you can later deduct from your taxes. In this case, your income tax has already been assessed, and you can only then donate it. You can either pay your income tax in full, or donate it to one of the STOs. You cannot do anything else with the money. You cannot donate it anywhere else, and you cannot keep it. You either give it to the government, or you give it to where the government wants you to give it. Ergo, it's basically government money.

The argument that Winn is making is that it's not only government money, but that it's going to fund religious schools. Here's where they lose their argument- the money goes from the people to the STOs (if they so choose to donate). STOs do not necessarily represent the religious schools. People can donate to any of the STOs they wish. Then the money goes from the STOs to the parents, then from the parents to the schools. It is the parent's choice which school their child attends. So even if the Court agrees that it is government money (I don't know whether they will or not), they can then put it to the Lemon test (a three part test designed for the case Lemon v Kurtzman to decide whether a law violates the Establishment Clause). I applied the Lemon test in my paper, and it passed.

The problem I was having is that neither side was making their case very clear, and I wasn't exactly sure what the issues were. I was unfamiliar with the law (since I haven't paid taxes in 7 years because I don't work), and the arguments they made were not explaining it. They were mostly arguing about the standing, with a little thrown in about the actual issue. So all my research was to actually understand the law, because in order to guess whether they have standing, I needed to understand whether it was government money.

A Quick Correction

2010-11-12T19:04:00.000-08:00

A couple of months ago, due to popular demand, I posted my recipe for White Chocolate Almond Unscotti Drops. In the recipe, I mistakenly put the wrong amount of eggs. The recipe calls for 4 eggs, not 2 as I originally put. My apologies for anyone who tried to make them and had everything come out horribly wrong. If you did, and they sucked, and you were just too nice to tell me, A) I appreciate that, and B) please the give the recipe another chance. They are really quite good, when you are given the proper directions.

Randomness and Opinions

2010-11-11T18:05:00.000-08:00

I've gotten some questions lately about a couple of political/news issues- mostly from concern that I hadn't commented on them yet. Apparently, my friends were afraid something bad had happened to me when I had no comment on the Keith Olbermann situation. Rest assured, my darlings, that I am fine. I just happened to have spent the last week trying to keep my head above water, school wise. So I will cover my political opinions at the end of this post. In the meantime-

It's finally fall here in AZ. We went from having our air conditioning still running on Saturday, to wearing sweaters by Wednesday. This is very typical of Arizona weather. I'm now currently ensconced in fuzzy socks and lounge pants (I refuse to say "sweat pants" because that brings mental images of horrible light grey pants with gathered hems and holes in various places- these are stylish flare pants in dark grey, thank you very much!).

I got a 105% on my last exam- a perfect score and 5 points of extra credit. I've very excited by this. I also got an 85% on my last math test- which is totally awesome in and of itself, not to mention when compared to the 67.5% on the test before that.

I finished the giant-ass shawl I was knitting, for what felt like months (it was in reality only about ten days). It's gorgeous and huge. I used Aruancania Itata Multy, which is available on closeout from Webs. It's a nice sock weight yarn, but sadly, it did not soften as much as I had hoped, and it bled all over my hands when I was using it. I had an issue when I was knitting where I was going to run out of yarn, so I had to buy more. Unfortunately, because they don't use color names, only what the primary colors are and a number, I got confused and ordered the wrong color. Fortunately, I was smart enough to change colors at a strategic place, so it would look like a border if it was obvious (unnecessary as it turns out- it doesn't even show after blocking). I'll be wearing it to school tomorrow, so all my friends who were anxiously waiting to see the finished product can. The downside is that it's very heavy and large (73"). If I make it again, I'm definitely going to use lace weight yarn- mostly to be affordable. I had to order 5 skeins total, making the yarn for this project the most expensive ever for me. Lace weight would have gone a lot farther for a lot less. I have left over yarn that will go to the Christmas charity scarves. I tried to post a picture, but I am having Google issues, so if you are interested, here's my Rav project page for it.

JoAnn's was having a big sale on Blue Moon Jewelery supplies, so I hit the store and stocked up for holiday gifts and a graduation gift for Smallfry (for those who may not know, because I haven't referenced her lately, Smallfry is my bestie). I'm sure I'll have pictures soon, because I'll be digging in to make some after I finish my homework this weekend.

I'm going to pick another small shawl project to get me through the next couple weeks, but after that, due to prepping for finals, I'm going to be seriously invested in the scarves and hats for charity.

Susie over at Useless Beauty put up some gorgeous photos.

Oh, and if any one's looking for some good holiday gifts, I'd like to recommend Silver's shop.

***
So now that I've covered the basic stuff, I'm going to move on the political stuff, so those of you who don't care can go ahead and leave :)

Let's start with the item I've gotten the most amount of emails and phone calls about (seriously my dears, I had no idea so many of you read my blog)- The Keith Olbermann Kerfuffle. For those who may not know, Keith Olbermann is a political commentator/host on MSNBC (a fairly liberal news outlet). Last week, it was disclosed that Keith had donated money to three democratic candidates. Upon the news of this, MSNBC suspended Keith indefinitely without pay, for violating a company policy that mandates prior approval of donations before they can be made(Keith claims to have been unaware of the rule, as it's not spelled out in his contract). Keith only missed two shows, and was back to work after what amounted to a long weekend. Some people have criticised MSNBC for the suspension, some people have criticised Keith for making the donations in the first place (stating that it diminishes his credibility). So my friends want to know my opinion. Well, here it is. MSNBC is wrong.

What an employee does with their own money is their own business. It's that simple. I don't care what their job is- so long as they are not breaking the law, it's no one's business, especially their boss's, how someone spends their money. Now, to be clear, I think the hosts/commentators/whatever should have to disclose donations, mostly so the network is not blindsided by the reports. But to require approval? It's just wrong. Do they require approval of where he lives before he can pay his rent? I don't think so. And before people start jumping all over me for making a ludicrous comparison, let me elaborate here.

Yes, I understand that Keith represents MSNBC. He's a public figure, connected firmly to the company in the minds of their viewers. However, they are a liberal network, and even if they weren't, he's a liberal commentator. His political views are well known. And he, as a citizen, has the right to express those views however he wishes. They knew he was liberal when they hired him (or at the very least have known for years). They know the content of his show is liberal. They cannot claim innocence. Therefore, they don't get to claim that his donations could have an impact on how people view their company. People view their company on the content of the shows they air. Therefore, whether he donates or not really has no impact on them. What it really comes down to is this: once that paycheck is cut, that money is Keith's, not MSNBC, and they have no more right to dictate how any portion of it is spent. No one does.

He did not cross any lines in relation to his job. He never publicly endorsed a candidate on air. He never did any fundraising for candidates. He never let candidates fund-raise when they were guests on his show. He did contribute to one candidate a few hours after interviewing them, but it was technically after. All things considered, I believe he was on the up and up.

And truthfully, I don't believe it damages his reputation. He's well known to be liberal, and it should not come as a surprise to anyone who watches his show that he would support these candidates, in whatever way he saw fit. It certainly did not diminish him in my eyes. And before anyone tries to claim that it's because I'm a fan I'm going to support him, I'd like to make this clear: I don't always support Keith. Sometimes his behavior crosses a line for me. I've even been known to turn off his show if he goes too far. I'm more than willing to call him out when he does that. I just don't believe this is one of those times.

***
Also- Joe Miller is shaping up to be a very poor loser. The Tea Party candidate in Alaska appears to be losing to Republican write-in candidate Lisa Murkowski- and is now claiming that misspelled Murkowski votes are in fact protest votes for him. He's also filing suit with the courts to get any misspelled ballots ruled out- despite the fact that officials in Alaska have already ruled that they are valid, as long as they are close enough.

***
Andrew Shervill has been fired, for conduct unbecoming a state official. You might remember Shervill as the Assistant District Attorney in Michigan who was quasi-stalking and cyberbullying Chris Armstrong, the openly gay Student Body President at University of Michigan. It was a ridiculously long time in coming, but they did finally do the right thing.

On another note, our friend who posts here anonymously brought up a week or two ago that Chris Armstrong had pulled his protection order against Andrew Shervill. I'm of a divided opinion on this. I understand why he did it. I understand wanting to be the bigger person and all. But there comes a time when I think you should stand up for yourself and others like you, not just for a little while, but for as long as it takes. Yes, Shervill was fired shorty after the order was pulled, but I'm not sure Chris really did right by himself. True, it will stay on Shervill's record, but it will also show that it was volunartarily lifted. It lesses the blow, so to speak, and I'm not really sure that's the way to go.

In another note, the attorney for Chris Armstrong said on Anderson Cooper a few days ago that they are trying to get Shervill disbarred- as so he should be.

***
That's it for now, folks. I'll try to be back soon.

2010-11-08T06:43:00.000-08:00

For some reason, this picture makes me think of Susie, over at Uselessbeauty. (for the record, this is neither my cat nor my sewing machine)

Congress Is A Job

2010-11-02T13:51:00.000-07:00

As I sit here listening to Absolute Radio's 90's block, drinking coffee and studying for a polisci exam, well, honestly, I'm just waiting for MSNBC's election coverage to begin. But this year, something's a little different. My enthusiasm for elections is not what it has been. Oh sure, it started out as always- I gleefully await the first campaign ads, the news interviews, and the debates. Except, it all seems to have gone horribly wrong.

Now, I'll be the first to admit- if politics was every friendly and respectful, it was well before my time. It's an ugly, ugly game, and I've never liked it. I'm all for disagreeing and standing your ground, but I firmly believe you can do that without being so damn disrespectful (this is probably why I'll never have a career in politics). But this election year seems to have been so much worse.

We have one candidate who deliberately mangles the names of people he doesn't like- which is funny, when you're ten. When you're a fully grown man running for public office, it's childishly rude. A republican Governor candidate in NY sent out emails containing not only racist pictures (President and First Lady Obama dressed as a pimp and a ho), but also forwarded emails containing porn and bestiality. Yeah, that's classy. A democratic candidate in Florida ran an ad in which he referred to his republican opposition as "Taliban Dan". I personally don't find it appropriate at all to compare someone to a terrorist, unless they indeed happen to be a terrorist. I don't care what kind of political differences you have. It's just wrong. And the list goes on and on.

But it's more than just that. The way the candidates have been behaving towards the media, and in turn, towards their voters. Countless candidates have been refusing to answer questions from the media, unless they know for a fact that it's a "friendly" outlet. They are just flat out walking away when they don't like a question. Sharon Engle, the Republican Senate candidate in NV said outright that she would only answer questions once she was elected. The Governor here in AZ, who's running for reelection? She only did one debate because she was required to for a donation, and has refused to do others. She refused to so much as run ads on the local CBS affiliate because she didn't like a story they ran on her.

This bothers me, on so many levels. These people want to represent our country, but refuse to tell people why they should be allowed to. They want people to vote for them, but refuse to answer basic policy questions. Perhaps we should explain something to these people. Congress is a job. Campaigns are a job interview. A long, expensive, exhaustive interview. You wouldn't walk into Microsoft and expect them to hire you because you say they should. So why the hell do you expect us to? They are trying to avoid the interview process, and it's wrong.

Happy Samhain!

2010-10-31T18:25:00.000-07:00

I love Samhain. It's not my favorite Sabbat (that would be Candlemas), but it's pretty damn close. I'm not sure if it stems from the oppressive anti-Halloween atmosphere in which I grew up (no kidding- my mom used to say she hated the month of October because it was "the devil's month". He doesn't just get a night in my mother's world, he gets an entire month), or if it's because I've lost so many friend (serious- epic number of dead friends here). Whatever the reason, I do sincerely love it. We don't get any trick-or-treaters on my street, as it's far too dark, and all the events were last night, which I couldn't make because of the upheaval. So I'm spending Samhain as I usually do- having a marathon of some favorite movies, ordering pizza, and doing a small ritual on my own. We ordered the pizza last night and spread it out over two days, the ritual is just waiting for the right time, and I've worked my way through several of the movies (Two Scooby-Doos, Rocky Horror, and the Wizard of Oz are down, Hocus Pocus, Practical Magic, and my two favorite Buffy Halloween episodes to go).

I also managed to get my shawl finished, my study guide completed, and 82% of my math homework done- the rest we haven't covered in lecture yet. So I think, all things considered, I've had a very successful weekend. I'm off for the rest of my movies, and some more knitting on another project. I'll be back tomorrow with more political updates and opinions, with just two days until elections.

Happiness and Disappointments

2010-10-27T22:09:00.000-07:00

The post title pretty much sums it all up. I'll start with the happiness:

My knitting projects are coming along well
I got a great deal on yarn
I lost another ten pounds, without even trying
The kitties love me
I got a 98% on a paper I wrote in 90 minutes and only did one draft of (yeah, I could pass polisci in my sleep)
I've made new friends, which is a major achievement for me.
Favorite new band: The Red Romance. Awesome music that makes me want to dance around my room (as I've been doing for several days now)

Disappointments:

I got a 67.5 on my chapter three math test- my only consolation? Most of the class did nearly as bad as I.
My sister's best friend died. She's heartbroken. I can't fix it.
I live in AZ, where it's still hitting high 80s to low 90s. At the end of October. Bite me, you godsforsaken desert.
This political season. More on that later.
I'm going to miss the AZ Witch's Ball- and it's only five miles from my house this year.
I'm missing dinner with my ladies, and Samhain with my new friend AG. Yup, it all sucks.
Due to family emergency, I'm behind in my math
I still have my temporary crown. May the Gods of Dentistry have mercy on me, and allow me to get my permanent crown this Friday as scheduled.

Anyway, now that I'm done whining (for the most part), I'll be back shortly with other posts that sum everything up.

Yarn Porn, Randomness, And A Very Bad Week

2010-10-18T22:39:00.000-07:00

So first, my week went from bad to worse. My temporary crown broke loose. I had to miss classes. My permanent crown wasn't in. Temp broke while being cleaned. Some other chick in the dental office had thrown out my mold, because she didn't recognise my name (seriously- don't get me started there). Car broke down on the way to school this morning. Mom came to my rescue and got me to school and back. Had to wait over an hour by car for tow-truck. Now have sunburn down my entire left arm. A very painful sunburn. Had to reschedule dental appointment to get permanent crown put in. Now have to wait til Friday.

However, I am choosing not to dwell on these things. Normally I would have, but I got yarn in the mail, so I'm a really happy camper. I got some truly beautiful Arauncania Itata Multy on closeout from WEBs. It's being discontinued (gasp!), and so it's half off. I'm loathe to share this, because spreading it around will help it disappear before I can afford to buy more, but you are my friends after all. I got the Blues and Violets colorway(#1026):

I'm going to use it to make MMario's Queen of Heaven, just as soon as I get the charts transcribed to written (I frequently have double vision, which makes reading charts very difficult).

I spent Friday and Saturday finishing another MMario pattern, Tweety Pi. It's my second- the first went to one of my friends in Switzerland. I used Lorna's Laces Shepherd Sock in the September special color for Jimmy Bean's Wool, Chocolate Mousse. What started out like this:

Ended up looking like this:

I love knitting shawls with sock yarn. I love sock yarn. But I don't knit socks. It's not that I have anything against socks. It's more the fact that I live in Phoenix, where we only wear socks about two months of the year. It seems like a waste of really good yarn to knit socks that I'm never going to use.

Also, I finally had to admit a simple, glaring truth- I am a shawl knitter. Oh sure, sometimes I stray into scarves, and some day I'll learn to make a hat (for my sister- I personally don't wear hats. If I did, you'd never be able to see my pretty hair. I'm very vain about my hair). But I never get far from shawls. My TBK list is huge, and I have favorite designers. But the biggest clue of all, is the way I look at yarn. I immediately ignore chunky weights, because they don't make good shawls. You have to use ridiculously big needles to get any kind of lace to show. After color, the first thing I look for is drape. I also look for yardage, because my shawls take a lot of yarn (I am, after all, a 5'10 size 18 amazon). Low yardarge yarns aren't very good for me, because it gets very expensive. Today, I was looking at an aran weight on sale at Elann, and someone on Rav was showing off a gorgeous sweater they had made out of it. My first thought? "Oh, that would make a gorgeous Wool Peddler!" Yup, boys and girls. I am a shawl knitter.

So while I'm not completely willing to abandon my Idlewood yet, I am reclaiming the two packs of yarn I bought to make a couple of cardigans. 3600 yards each of laceweight baby merino will go very, very far.

I also spent a good chunk of Sunday trying to dekink yarn that had to be frogged. Some of you may remember than a few months ago, my kitten chewed a hole in my newly finished Queen Anne's Lace, and it couldn't be repaired, so off to the frog pond it went. I also did this with a couple of scarves I made, because I wanted the yarn for something else. Unfortunately, yarn that has been knit and blocked gets really kinked. I actually did not know this, but someone on Rav was kind enough to point it out, and tell me what to do. For those who may not know, what you have to do is put the yarn back into hanks, tie it off, soak it, and let it dry again, after which it will have to be rewound into balls so it can be knit again. I had about 12 balls to do this to. The first three were from my QAL, the others from the scarves, some of which were very small skeins. Fortuntely for me, they were 50% wool, so I was able to do felted joins, making them much bigger. The easiest way to put yarn back into skeins is to use a niddy-noddy- but I don't have one of those. What I do have, is an Amish-style yarn swift. If you don't know what that is, it's this:

I decided to use it in reverse: I taped the end of the center pull to a spoke on the swift, then spun it around so the yarn would wind back on to it. I imagine I looked a lot like my cat does when she plays with her track ball. Regardless of how ridiculous I might have looked, it was very effective. I used some simple cotton string to tie the hanks off in four places, and after soaking, hung on my drying rack.

In non-knitting news, I actually got two books read in the last month or so. They were short, easy reads, but a lot of fun, nonetheless. I don't have a lot of time to read, so cozy little mysteries are just perfect. In this case, it was the Cackleberry Club mysteries by Laura Childs. She has a couple of other series, The Tea Shop Mysteries, something about a knitting club, and also one about scrapbooking if I'm not mistaken. I found them fun and frothy. This week, I'm expecting the fourth book in Karen McInnerny's Grey Whale Inn Mysteries. I just love those. As soon as I finish my math and type up my report on Supreme Court oral arguements, I can dig in and read. Three whole books in one semester- it's really impressive.

And with that, I leave you all for now. I'd also like to apologise to any of my blog friends (if you all made it this far in my really long post)- I have not forgotten you. I'm just a little behind in reading and posting. I promise I'll try to catch up soon. It's just that my math test has to be taken by Friday, and on campus (they are usually due by Sunday and can be taken from home), so things are a little crunched there.

My New Happiness

2010-10-14T03:14:00.000-07:00

So yesterday, a whole two days earlier than expected, the postal service delivered a beautiful package to me. In this package was, as previously noted, the source of my new happiness. It was my KnitPicks Nickle-Plated Options interchangeable needles set (warning: long, gushing post about knitting supplies). I promised some friends I'd review them.

Just to refresh, last week, my size 9 circs I was using on my second Tweety Pi started to break. I recognized the feel, because the same thing happened the last time I made the Tweety Pi, only with my size 8s. I also recently had a problem when I went to knit my first sweater- I only have 40" circulars, and I needed smaller. Much, much smaller.

Now, I realised a few months ago that interchangeable were starting to make a lot more sense. First, I'm no longer as big a fan of magic loop knitting on 40" as I used to be. I love magic loop, don't get me wrong. I have a tendency to nearly put my eye when I try to knit with dpns. There was also that time I nearly staked my kitteh through the heart. But 24 or 32 would be much nicer, because you don't have to do as many rows. You have to knit many, many rows in magic loop before it's big enough to start working around. This gets very tedious. Also, some patterns change needle sizes, sometimes more than once. This also gets tedious, because you either have to knit from one pair to another, or you have to slip all the stitches from one set to another.

Unfortunately, it starts to get rather expensive to buy that many pairs of needles in that many lengths and sizes, especially at $15 to $20 a pair (which is the standard price of my Addis). This is when interchangeable start to sound really, really appealing. Now, my original plan was to save my money for a few months, and buy the Addi set. But when another pair of needles broke (the crappy cord literally started breaking at the join- I'll post photos for clarity as soon as I can find my camera), it sort of necessitated buying a new pair. And really, if it happened to two pair, then it was pretty safe to have concerns over the rest of the set. Granted, it could just be that this pattern is cursed, but the only way to verify that is to either A) knit a third and risk a third pair of needles or B) have a friend knit it and risk their needles. I decided to take the plunge rather than take the risk.

Now, I was really set on my Addi lace turbos. However, the interchangeable set had two things going against it- first, the price. The average price after looking around was $170. Normally I would say the Addis are worth it, but this was being done on the fly, with no chance to budget. The second issue I had was with the replacement cords. It's always good to have extra cords- something might happen to the one you are using, or you might need to start another project, or anything like that. For instance, I'm planning to use my shorter cords to hold the sleeve stitches for my Idlewood when I make it. Then I just have to attach the needle tips and knit. But I digress. Addi only sells the replacements in packages of three, for an average of $30. That's basically ten bucks apiece, which is pretty pricey for a damn cord.

Enter KnitPicks. As I'm trying to make this decision, I get my KP newsletter magazine thingie. And in it, they have their equivalent to the Addis (they also have some nice wood ones, or some acrylic, which I suppose some people would actually use). They are much, much more affordable, at $69 for the set, and $4.99 for each replacement cord. I looked for some reviews, and everyone seemed to love them, so I took the plunge. And boy howdy, am I ever glad! (yes, I said boy howdy. Deal)

They are lovely. They are gorgeous. They are shiny and smooth and fast. Most importantly, they feel just like my Addis. I wanted to use them for a few hours before I committed to loving them, but it didn't take that long. I used them to knit a swatch, and I loved them. I just love them more now after using them to start working on my Tweety Pi. I've knit up about 30 rows today. And I can I just tell you all how awesome changing the tips were?

I started to get concerned when I reached row 97 before I had to add a second skein of yarn. Now, to most people- either tiny people, or non knitters- this would sound good. This would sound like "Hey, I don't need as much yarn, and I'm going to save money". Now I'd like to take this moment to remind you all that I'm a 5'10 size 18. I worry about shawls being too small for me. One skein, especially at only about 430 yards, going that far worries me. So I decided to switch from my 9s to my 10s for the rest of the shawl. And it was so easy. I just shoved the shawl down onto the cord, and changed the tips one at a time. I did not have to knit from one pair to another, or slip each and every stitch from one pair to another. This alone is worth the price.

I also just found out they have a really awesome accessory for this- needle id tags. If for some reason, you need to stop the project you are working on and start something else (and hey, it happens!), you find the tag for the needle size you are using, slide it on, and screw on the endcaps, leaving the project on the cord. And when you go back to it, you don't have to struggle to remember what size needle you were on. I think this is brilliant, and will definitely be buying them.

Another great thing about these is that all the KP needles use the same cords, so you can buy your favorite sizes in other materials- so I could easily buy 6,7 and 8s in the Harmony wood, and use those when needed (let's be honest- some yarns just like wood better). I think this is truly fantastic, allowing knitters to mix and match to suit their needs. You can also buy individual needle tip sets, so you can buy more of your favorite sizes (I use 6,7, and 8's the most). I've only found two downsides to the set, and they are little ones: First, no 16" cord. They start at 24 inches. Second, none of their needle tips go smaller than a 4. Now, this is not a problem for me, as I almost never knit with anything below a 5, but some people knit really fine lace on 0,1 or 2s. But overall, I say they are more than worth it.

Just to review, they come with:

A full set of needle tips sizes 4-11. 13, 15, 17 and 10 3/4 can be bought separately (I've never heard of 10 3/4 before)
Two each of the 24 and 32 inch cords with screw on end caps, and a cord key to make sure they screw on really tight
An organising case, with plenty of room, keeping everything neat, tidy, and accessible.

(for the record, I also bough two 40" cords separately)

Pros:

Very slick and smooth, feel just like my Addi lace turbos
Very smooth joins- there is nothing to snag or catch yarns
The key hole can double as a holder for a lifeline thread (you tie the lifeline thread through it, and it places the lifeline as you knit)
The cords are very flexible, and none of mine have any kinks in them (unlike my three pair of Addis, which I constantly have to soak in warm water to dekink)
Can buy replacement needle tips and replacement cables (available in 24, 32, 40, 47 and 60 inches), both at very affordable prices

Cons:
No 16 inch cables
No needle tips under size 4

Yeah. Total happiness. I guess what it really comes down to is, why pay that much for Addi clicks, when these get the job done the same for much less (yes, even after buying extra needle tips and cables)

Praise the Gods and Hallelujah!

2010-10-12T18:34:00.000-07:00

A federal judge in California today issued a worldwide immediate ban on the enforcement of discharges under Don't Ask, Don't Tell. Meaning that as of the moment she issued it, no one, no where in the world, serving in any branch of the United States Armed Forces can be discharged for being gay.

The Department of Justice has 60 days to appeal. They have made no comment as to whether they will or not. I'm hoping for "not". I'm hoping they are willing to just admit defeat, admit that what they are doing is wrong, and let it go.

Random Roundup

2010-10-07T20:28:00.000-07:00

So I'm taking a quick break from political ranting to catch you all up on the more mundane aspects of my life.

I spent the last two days writing a paper for my civil rights class. A says it doesn't suck, so that's good.

I was in the middle of knitting my second Tweety Pi shawl when my size 9 circs started breaking (same thing happened a couple months ago with my 8s, knitting the exact same shawl). So now I have to wait for my new needles to arrive. I broke down and bought an interchangable set, so I can just change the cord if this happens again. It's probably because I knit magic loop when I knit in the round, and the needles I have are not equipped to hold up to that. These needles have a hollow, flexible clear cord that's glued on to a pair small double point needles. Proper circs have a cord that goes into the ends of the needles, and the end is secured around it. After careful consideration (as they were on my Yule wish list anyway), I opted for the KnitPicks Nickle Plated Options. I really wanted the Addi Lace Turbo, as I have a couple pair of those, but they are really, really pricey ($175 to KP's $70). And Addi's replacement cords were more expensive, and you have to buy them in packs of three. KP got really good reviews, so I chose the more reasonable price.

In the meantime, I'm putting in some work on the Old Shale shawl I'm knitting Bliss's daughter. I should have it done in a couple days. I started it about six to eight weeks ago, and was only working on it at doctors appointments. Obviously, I wasn't making much progress.

The new needles will also come in handy for my Idlewood sweater. I cast on for it, and discovered that my needles are too long (I only have 40"). It's clearly too expensive to keep buying needles is various sizes (for anyone, let alone a student like me), so I was going to have to wait until I got the interchangables anyway. Now I can cast on as soon as I finish my current WIPs (I have a rule about no more than two projects going at one time).

I seem to be having allergies again. I wouldn't mind, but I never have medication on hand, because I never know when I'm going to get them (when I buy meds, they expire because I don't need them). My body is not consistent.

The weather has finally cooled down- and by "cooled down", I mean that it's now down into the high 90s. It's not much, but it is a start. I'm hoping by Samhain that it will be nice and cool (especially since I made a shawl specifically for my ritual).

I'm thinking of joining Silver's Craft Week Or Bust. I'm thinking it might encourage me to get in some quality craft time around my homework (which I didn't last week, and the fallout was not pretty).

And on one final note- head over to Susie's blog to see some wicked good graffiti pics. The woman's a wonder with a camera.

A Warning To Decent Human Beings...

2010-10-05T08:04:00.000-07:00

The topic I'm about to share will you is outrageous, and may cause spontaneous anger. Please do not read if you have abnormally high blood pressure. I don't wish to cause you to stroke out.

Down in Obion County, Tennessee, you apparently do not have an automatic right to the services of the Fire Department. Apparently, you now have to pay $75 if you want it. And when one man didn't pay, the fire department refused to put out the fire in his home, under the instructions of the Mayor.

The man whose house was lost in the Fire, Gene Cranick, believed that they would still put out the fire if it happened, and charge a higher fee afterwards. This is not the case. The fire department refused to respond to the fire, until it spread to a fee-paying neighbor's home. Then they proceeded to put out the fire on the other property, then sat back and watched Cranick's home burn. He lost his home, all his posessions, three dogs and one cat.

Since when do we live in a world where it was acceptable to let someone's home burn down? It's preposterous. My mother keeps saying "what if there had been people inside?", but to me, that's hardly the point. They let someone's house burn down. This man and his parents are essentially homeless, because of this ridiculous policy.

See, most places in the United States fund their fire services with an involuntary tax. This county adopted a really stupid rule where you "decide" whether to pay or not. According to Mr. Cranick, they had previously made exceptions for others in emergency situations, and that he offered to pay whatever was necessary to get the fire put out. They ignored this.

True, he did not pay into the coverage. But the County had other options than letting his house burn down. They could have put the fire out, and then recovered the costs from him at a later date. It's just outrageous to let a home burn down, costing these people all their belongings and their home (not to mention their faithful furry companions).

I'd like to ask how basic human decency allows this, but apparently it's not all that basic anymore.

Shame On You, Andrew Shervill ***Updated

2010-09-29T10:12:00.000-07:00

Since there won't be any dental work until Friday, I thought I'd take this pre-pain-med opportunity to tell you all about the horrifying behavior of Andrew Shervill.

Mr. Shervill is Assistant Attorney General in Michigan. He is currently, on his off time, waging a one man war against Chris Armstrong, the student body president of University of Michigan. Chris Armstrong has not committed any crime. He's done absolutely nothing wrong- unless you happen to be a raging homophobe, like Mr. Shervill. See, Chris Armstrong is the first openly gay student body president at the University of Michigan. This is the entire basis of Mr. Shervill's attack campaign.

Shervill has started a blog, dedicated entirely to the harassment of Mr. Armstrong. He posts comments that he has absolutely no proof of, several outright lies, and some things that are just in poor taste. He puts pictures of rainbow flags with swastikas on them next to pictures of Mr. Armstrong. He claims Mr. Armstrong has sex in churches and children's playgrounds, calls him a Nazi, and accuses him of joining a racist society- which is in fact an honor society called The Order of Angels, and includes former President Gerald Ford among it's members. He's also admitted to protesting outside Mr. Armstrong's house. What's more, he has the nerve to claim that this is a "political campaign", not a personal attack.

Except nobody's running for a political office here. And what's more, even this somehow were an official campaign, this is not an appropriate way to conduct one. This is a personal attack, based completely on the fact that Mr. Armstrong is gay.

Now, I should make clear here that Andrew Shervill is not doing this during his working hours. He does this all when he is off the clock, so to speak. He is not using state resources for this, as far as we know. Also, he cannot be fired from his job for his "political views", as is only fair. However, this is not an excuse for this kind of behavior. It's libelous, at the very least. Yes, Andrew Shervill is entitled to his own opinions. He is not entitled to harass Mr. Armstrong because of them. There are laws about this kind of thing.

Now, before anyone starts arguing Free Speech/First Amendment here (as Mr. Shervill is), let me explain something: While you do have the right to free speech, there are limits to that right. And one of those exceptions is that Free Speech does not automatically trump "laws of general applicability". This means that other laws- such as those concerning someone's safety- do not take a back seat to Free Speech (for example, you can't attack someone and claim First Amendment protection). Also, the U.S. Supreme Court has ruled previously that public officials do not have the same Free Speech rights as the rest of us, because of the influence and power their jobs wield.
What's even more baffling to some is that Andrew Shervill is an attorney. He's a lawyer. I know this, because you can't be an Assistant Attorney General without being a lawyer. He should know that behavior like this is illegal. Is he so blinded by his insane hatred that he fails to see this, or does he just think he's above the law?

But more than my issues with Andrew Shervill (and really, this is saying something) is my issue with his boss, Michigan Attorney General Mike Cox. My issue with him is that he has the power to fire Shervill for his conduct, regardless of the fact that is it outside of work. Mr. Cox has made a statement stating that Shervill's "personal opinions are his and his alone, and do not reflect the views of the Michigan Department of Attorney General. But his immaturity and lack of judgement outside the office are clear."

Call me crazy, but this statement against Shervill's actions- if we can laughingly call it that- seems to be, well, a little on the pussy side if you ask me. It doesn't even qualify as a strong statement. And it's not what should really be being done. Mr. Cox should have fired Andrew Shervill. This is clearly conduct unbecoming a public official, and Mr. Cox is well within his rights to do so. Except Mr. Cox won't do it, seemingly because of the political ramifications. Mr. Cox is a republican, and has a lot of ties to conservative evangelical groups, who would presumably be angered if Mr. Shervill were fired.

So apparently, it's okay to show very poor judgement and break the law, so long as it furthers your bosses political career. It's cases like these that make me wonder why I love the law so much.

I should also note that Mr. Armstrong has retained an attorney, and is taking action against Mr. Shervill. Good for him.

***Update- Mr. Armstong was granted an order of protection or an order of restraint against Mr. Shervill, who is now barred from coming within a certain distance of him, including his home and his school campus. Upon this decision, Mr. Shervill has taken an indefinite, voluntary leave of absense from his job. Should he attempt to return to his job, an investigation into his actions will begin.

To Answer Some Questions

2010-09-26T22:20:00.000-07:00

I've been getting plenty of emails and phone calls lately about certain things going on in politics- mostly it's being noted that I haven't commented on some things. This is not out of neglect, or because I'm lacking an opinion. It's because I was busy studying for an exam, and trying not to get my ass handed to me in math. So here are the answers to some of the most commonly asked/commented upon (oh, and a note for those of you who are about to stop reading: I chipped a tooth quite badly this morning, and will probably have to have a root canal at some point this week. Do not expect frequent updates to this blog during that time):

Christine O'Donnell: The Republican nominee for a Senate seat in Deleware, she's been making headlines everywhere with her anti-masturbation propoganda. Never mind the fact that she somehow thinks it's any of her business what we do with ourselves. Never mind the fact that she thinks scientists are growing lab rats with human brains. Never mind the fact that she's grossly misinformed about Wicca. If you have any kind of conscience whatsoever, please, Delewarians- do not vote for this woman. Not for any of the above mentioned reasons, but because she has said- and there is proof she said this- that condoms do not stop the spread of HIV, and in fact furthers the spread of it. Yes, you heard me. She actually says, contrary to all scientific proof otherwise, that condoms spreads HIV and AIDs. These kind of lies are not the usual political bullshit. They are not the kind of lies that only hurt or defame a political rival. They are the kind of lies, that if spread too far, cause a clear threat to public health and safety. Please citizens of Deleware, do not elect this woman.

Pat Robertson: Pat Robertson, an extremely conservative televangelist for those who may not know, came out a few weeks ago against a mosque down in Tennessee, where they have been planning to expand to a bigger building, as they are too big for where they are now. He made ridiculous claims that if they are allowed to have their mosque, they will begin taking over the city counsel, and will soon be requiring the citizens to be Muslim. He stated that first they would require prayer five times a day, then they would require all restrooms to be equipped for feet-washing, then they would require head coverings for women, and on and on. We should not be surprised- this is the same man who claimed Haiti brought their earthquake upon themseleves because they made a deal with the devil. Yeah. You heard that right. Well, I have some news for Mr. Robertson. There is this little thing called the Establishment Clause. It's the opening line of the first amendment to the United States Constitution. It says "Congress shall make no law respecting the establishment of a religion". What that means, to put it in really simple terms (as it seems to me you require), is that no part of the government can establish an official religion. Thanks to the selective incorporation of the 14th amendment, this applies to all forms of government- and yes, that means everything from the President and Congress, down to the lowest city council. So you can go ahead and start sleeping through the night again, you crackpot. You need not wake up worrying for those poor souls down in Murfreesboro. Rest assured that the Muslims will not be violating our first amendment rights (unlike what you would happily do to them).

Don't Ask Don't Tell: Yes, it was declared unconstitutional. And that makes me really freaking happy. You know what would make me happier? If the Department of Defense does not appeal, letting it be officially shot down by the state Supreme courts. What I would really like to see is the military forced to offer everyone discharged under it their previous jobs back. They should also have the option of remaining civilian, but having the dishonerable discharge removed from their record. Should the DOD appeal this (and they still have a few weeks to decide), I would hope the US Supreme Court takes the case, and decides as the two lower courts have.

That's all for now- I'm off to bed, and I'll be back as soon as possible with more school and knitting updates. But that all depends on what the dentist says when I get it.

Mabon

2010-09-22T18:13:00.000-07:00

It is Mabon, otherwise known as the fall equinox. It is now officially fall (although I wish someone would explain that to the fucking AZ weather). It is a time when the God is waning, and the Goddess is starting to wake.

This is a day of thanksgiving for us pagan/wiccans who celebrate it (which I find much preferable to the actual American holiday of Thanksgiving in November, where I often find myself cooking food I won't eat for people I don't really like). I will be doing a small ritual tonight to give thanks to the God and Goddess. I even found my favorite candle, a brown one scented like pumpkin pie (to help celebrate the new season), and made pumpkin spice muffins for my offering (and breakfast tomorrow!). I'll make up some nice tea this evening, and write my blessing, which I write new every year (although it is always similiar to previous ones).

So whatever you do to celebrate your Mabon- blessed be, brothers and sisters.

Congratulations, Repulsive Senators

2010-09-21T12:48:00.000-07:00

You are so homophobic, that keeping gays from serving openly in the military is more important to you than our national defense. You are so homophobic that they are not good enough to die for your freedom. That is an impressive level of hatred. So congratulations members of the Senate GOP- you win the Douchebags of the Year award.

Algebra Invaded My Geometry

2010-09-20T17:27:00.000-07:00

It's terrible. I mean really terribly.It's the worst thing to happen to me since my burgundy and black wool slubbed. I was doing my math homework today, discovered that Algebra is now hanging around Geometry. Don't they understand? Algebra is a bad seed. It's an incorrigable juvenile deliquent that cannot be trusted. It will teach my geometry to smoke and underage drink and shoplift.

It must be stopped.

Project Pagan Enough

2010-09-18T14:12:00.000-07:00

Just thought I'd take some time away from my homework (okay, I'm really knitting- but only because I was sick last night and now I'm really tired and I was making a total cock-up of math) to share something really important. I found this over at Just Another Pagan Blog, and I really think it's worth sharing.

It's called Project Pagan Enough, and it's been started by Fire Lyte (if you know Witchvox, you should be familiar with him). It's a movement to get people within the Pagan community to be more respectful of each other, and also of people within other faiths.

This is something I've long had issue with- to the point I quit visiting nearly all the pagan/wiccan online communities I used to go to. In recent years I've noticed a drastic change in the behavior of the community- and clearly I'm not the only one. People are insulting others for not being "pagan enough", the term fluffy-bunny is so overused it's not even relevant anymore, and just plain nastiness has become rampant in some places. Well, Fire Lyte says enough is enough, and I'm joining in. Here is a small sampling of some of his fine points:

Project Pagan Enough seeks to say that - no matter your beliefs, practices, looks, or loves - you are pagan enough. We can argue theology back and forth all day long and disagree with one another's fluff-factor until the cows come home, but it is high time that we stop denigrating one another's level of being pagan. Paganism does not have a set definition, and there is definitely not a dress code or music-loving requirement...

Also, Project Pagan Enough seeks to encourage members of the pagan community to be more tolerant of other religions, beliefs, and practices. What do I mean? Aren't we the most tolerant of all faith-based communities? Well, what happens when you hear the word 'Christian?' Are you still that tolerant, loving, inclusive pagan?

Many of us, and this is not specific to Paganism, choose not to really understand other faiths. Thus, we base our ideas of that faith on actions of the people that practice it. We say that Christianity is a mirror of the Christians who claim it as their faith. But, this is a horrible method of learning about other faiths, just like trying to learn Paganism by looking at the actions of self-proclaimed Pagans. People kill in the name of all faiths. People hurl insults in the name of all faiths. People foster hatred and jealousy and ill-will and harm in the name of all faiths. Project Pagan Enough seeks to say that we should be secure enough in our beliefs and ourselves to truly tolerate other religions and stop laying blame for what we consider to be the evils of the world on the doorstep of other faiths.

This is not the whole of his post, only a brief snippet to show the basics of what he is trying to do. So click on the Project Pagan Enough icon, go visit Fire Lyte's blog, and see what he has to say in it's entirety.

Warning- A long, Gratuitous Post About Knitting, Yarn, Patterns, and Finished Objects

2010-09-15T20:07:00.000-07:00

There is something beautiful that happens in the month of September. It's National Sewing month. This includes yarn and things. I'm not really sure why- and frankly, who's complaining. Not me. Oh no, not me. Do you know why? Because of the knitting jackpot, when really nice companies run sales.

See, I have this love for the Elann yarn company. It rivals-possibly surpasses- my love for the Alpaca With A Twist company. I discovered Elann when I discovered one of their designes, SK Kozinski. I don't remember how I discovered her- I think perhaps I was invited by someone to join the "Fans of SK" group on Ravelry. Maybe I found her while pattern browsing. I truly can't remember. Either way, I found her work, and fell in love. This led to my first KAL (knit-along, for all you non-knitters out there). It was the Dancing Crane stole, to be knit in Elann Silken Kydd mohair. Elann.com was offering a deal for us- a bag of the 3 skeins needed for the projects for $15. And thus my love affair began.

I'm not sure what it is was that I loved so much- after all, the Silken Kydd is the same composition as Rowan's Kidsilk Haze, or Knit One Crochet Too's Douecer Et Soie (yes, I probably spelled that wrong), both of which I've used before. And yet, I love it more. This led to another KAL with Silken Kydd (the Cloverfield Scarf), which led to another Dancing Crane KAL, and a very long pattern queue. Clearly, SK's designes are a gateway drug.

Which leads me back to my original point- September sales. Elann is having sales out the wazoo. Nearly all their yarn (already reasonable priced if you order from them directly) is bundled up and on sale, often with free-or-cheap patterns to go with them. First it started with a blowout sale- a 10 ball bag of pure peruvian alpaca, exactly enough to knit SK's Garden Path Shawl. It looks like this

The problem here? Well, it's not really a problem. I was so sleep deprived that not only did I not remember ordering it (although my mother assures me I did), I also accidentally ordered the Baby Merino. It's gorgeous, and I love it, and it came with enough yarn to knit the Tissue Cardigan, even in my size. So we decided to keep it, because it was 3600 yards for $24. I've never knit a sweater before, but I was so in love with the pattern, I've decided to try. I ordered a gorgeous slate grey (we actually liked it so much we ordered another pack in cypress green that hasn't come yet)

Then SK posted that a pattern of her's I had wanted ( the Forget-Me-Not) was availible again, in a new yarn, and to celebrate, Elann was offering pack of that yarn. This time, the yarn pack was only a couple dollars less than buying the equivalent amount of the single skeins, and they didn't have all the colors in the packs, so I decided to pay a couple of dollars more for these:

Yeah, the blue and the burgundy (sapphire and oxblood are the actual names). I'm totally in love.

In addition to all these lovely yarns, I got some new knitting books (or I will once they get here). One is a book of vintage patterns from the 40's through the 60's, and it's gorgeous. The downside is that it was only availible on Kindle, and I can't print it, so I'm going to have to transcribe all the patterns, because I am not going to try to knit while reading off my Kindle. Not gonna happen. I also got Galina Khmeleva's Gossamer Webs Designs. She wrote what is considered the definitive book on Orenburg lace, but it is out of print, and the used copies are going for an insane amount of money. This is a smaller version, but it's getting harder to come by, so we decided to grab it while we can. I also got Barbara G Walker's A Treasury Of Knitting Patterns, considered by many to be the ultimate stitch dictionary. And last but not least, I got Margaret Stove's Wrapped In Lace. She's designed many beautiful lace shawls, and I'm thrilled she put them in a book. I've also got some books from the library with patterns, just to check them out and see if there's anything in there I will knit.

In finished object news (if any of you are still with me), I finished my shawl last night. Through a very happy accident, I made a capelet instead of a shawl (yes, I know, only me). I was trying to keep my bind off from being larger than my cast on, which is what happened to my last one, so I dropped my needle size down one for the bind off. Well, for some reason, this made for a very tight bind off that curves slightly, causing the rest of it to flare, and it to pin perfectly at my neckline. I love it when things go wrong in a good way. I haven't blocked her yet (I'm just about to get to that), but here are a couple of pictures: one of the finished project, and one where you can see the beads clearly.

Crankiness, Impatience and a Random Roundup

2010-09-14T16:04:00.000-07:00

Crankiness- I really hate math. I hate math with a fiery passion that leaves scorch marks. I really don't think I should be required to take algebra to be a lawyer. And if one more person tells me it's so "that you can learn to look at things differently in order to solve problems", I'm going to bash their heads in with a tire iron. Algebra is not helping me learn to approach problems differently- it's helping me learn to approach different recipes involving gin. Reading court cases- now that will teach me how to approach problems differently.

Fortunately for me, there is Bob The Math God! Remember the other day, when I mentioned my handyman taking pity on me and helping me out? Well, two things- first off, calling him an handyman seriously underrates him. He's a licensed contractor with a degree in aerospace engineering. Which probably explains why he's a math god. Second, he's offered to take pity on me again, and tutor me for a couple hours every week or so. Not just a math god, but an all-around nice guy.

Impatience- All over the rest of this fine country I call home (because I can't leave yet), the weather is slowly turning. It's cooling down, leaves are contemplating turning different colors- some have even started already. People are talking about pulling out their sweaters, if not actually doing it. Not here in Phoenix, boys and girls. No, we're still in triple digit temperatures. We're supposed to be something like 106 today. I hate Phoenix.

I'm impatient because I long for autumn. I love fall. I love when it cools down enough to turn off the air and open the windows. I love it when it starts getting just a bit chilly in the early mornings and late evenings. I love it when you inexplicably start smelling pumpkins and spice in the air. And I want it. I want it freaking now. Sadly, this is not something that usually happens until sometime in October. Which I'm impatient for it to be. Another month or so, and I'm sure I will be happy as the proverbial clam (which reminds me, how do we know how happy that damn clam is, anyway?)

And now for the Random Roundup-

I'm very nearly finished with my Dancing Crane II- just a few rows left I'm going to bang out tonight. Then I'll start one of the scarves I'm making for A's Midwinter gift (I'm making her several, as needs them, and is fairly easy to please)

I've got several more projects in queue, including my first cardigan. I'm not ashamed to admit- I'm afraid of the sweater. I've never knit a sweater. I've never knit anything close to a sweater before. But I figure if I can knit nupps and kitchner stitch, well, anything, then I can probably handle a very simple cardigan.

I worked out. On a week day. Someone should be proud of me. I also turned down the chocolate milkshake the 'rents brought home. Someone should give me a damn metal.

I've been watching all the episodes of Midsomer Murders, in order. This is fun. It's been so long since I've watched the early ones, I don't remember who done it. I'm up to episode 13 (in about three days). There are currently 75 episodes on dvd (with more coming next month). This is going to take a while. But there's nothing quite like knitting with brutal, bloody murders to cheer up a night.

I'm going to experiment with dying natural yarn. I'll let you know how that goes.

For now, I'm off to finish my shawl, and at some point, study for my exam on Monday.

Of Knitting, School, and Sundry

2010-09-10T08:00:00.000-07:00

Before I get caught up in schoolwork for the weekend, or spew any of the other rants building up within me, I thought I'd take a few moments to get back to basics.

My third KAL is going very well (that's Knit-a-long, for my non-knitters). I'm making my second Dancing Crane shawl, and I'm about 2/3 of the way done- in 10 days. I'm a freakishly fast knitter. I did fourteen rows last night, which is impressive, if you consider that not only was I placing beads, I was watching Midsomer Murders. I've joined another KAL, which I'll be starting right after I finish the DCII (sorry, I can't link to that- it's A's midwinter gift, and she sometimes reads my blog).

I did very badly on my math quiz yesterday. Only 73%. I keep getting very confused about what I'm supposed to do when. It's a hybrid class, which means it's part online and part in class. We meet for lecture/help twice a week, and the rest we do at home. The textbook is built into the software, and there are other help features, such as the "help me solve this", where it walks you through step by step, or the "view an example", where it shows you the different steps of a similar problem, but without the explainations. There's just a few problems with this.

1) The textbook will only pull up to the subsection I'm working on, and will not go back to earlier sections. I have to close out of the homework.

2) The "help me solve this" is sometimes giving us wrong information (like when I needed help with rational numbers- the information loaded is for real numbers).

3) Both of the help features skips vital information, assuming you already know how to do it. This is a bad assumption for people like me. I'm a math idiot. Math is a foreign language- and I am not fluent.

So today, as much as I hate to spend the money (since I already had to pay for the software), I'm going to go over and buy the book. This is what I did last semester. I bought the book with the software by mistake, but then kept it all semester. This way, I could have it open to the section I needed, with all the explainations and examples right there, and I could work it with the actual problem I needed to solve. I've come to believe this is why I did so well last semester, so I am now going to test this theory. I figure it can't hurt. I have to take my test by Sunday night, and I'm hoping to at least bring that score up ten points. Fifteen would be nicer. I don't really care about getting an A, but I would like a B, and must have a C.

The stress of math is the reason I needed to watch two of my favorite Midsomer episodes last night. I figured a few bloody murders and the pretty English countryside might make it just a little better (it did, but I think the math book might do more).

I've made more shawl pins out of magnet faces. It was fun. I also made some more earrings. I still can't figure out how to make them photograph decently- but I endeavor, and will figure it out eventually.

I bought more yarn, for my immedate-future projects. I am in love with the designs of SK Kozinski (she designed the Dancing Crane), and have three or four more projects immediately in cue. In addition to the really easy triangle Garter Lace Shawl I'm working on at school (yes, I have three projects going- it's very strange).

I want to make cookies again- I'm trying to behave. It sucks.

We have to take my care in for basic servicing after school today. My warranty is about to expire, and some things need to be done (like I'm very low on brake fluid, which is not a comforting thought). So we're dropping the car, coming home where I'll be getting ready for math and polisci exams, then going back tomorrow morning. This is not my idea of fun. But then, neither is brake failure.

And now I must go get ready for school. Do you have any idea how hard it is to get yourself up on a Friday morning for one lousy class?

Getting My Bitch On

2010-09-08T22:47:00.000-07:00

***political

A topic that come up today has made me livid. And I mean, screaming-cursing-damn-near-throwing-things livid. It takes a lot to get this kind of reaction from me. As I've stated before, anger is not one of my dominate emotions. It always surprises me how angry I can be when I get there.

On a bulletin board I belong to, one of the ladies posted about how the Washington Post stated that "most Americans are against the ground zero mosque", and how annoyed she was by this statement, as no one asked her. Her point being that you can't really make that statement when you haven't asked most Americans. Polls and statistics can be skewed to acheive certain results. She was also expressing her distain at this attitude, should it in fact be true.

Now, this is not the part I had a problem with. I think I've made it very clear that I support the Park 51 Community Center (not mosque). The first of my issues comes from some people saying that "just because you can doesn't mean you should" (this is a recurring quote from one of our favorite book series). Some people also said that it was "insensitive" to New York. One friend of mine actually said it's "a slap in the face", while at the same time acknowledging that the Muslim community at large is not to blame.

So which is it? They aren't to blame, or it's a slap in the face? Because you can't have it both ways. If the majority of Muslims had nothing to do with it (as anyone with half a brain knows), then why is it a slap in the face? Because a small group of extremists who claim to be Muslim attacked there? Then should Christians be allowed to build churches near abortion centers, when Christian extremist have bombed such centers, and assassinated doctors who perform abortions? Wouldn't that be a "slap in the face" to the workers there?

Of course they should- just as Muslims should be able to build Park 51 right where they have planned. It's a constitutional right. And I'm sick of people saying crap like this. Would it be a slap in the face if it were a Christian church? A buddhist temple? A Hindu temple? What if my friends and I decided to start a coven and go hold our Samhain ritual there? No. No one would care. They only care about this because it's being built by Muslims.

But the part here that I really hate- that nearly made me throw up were the words said by someone I thought I knew(I was clearly wrong). She came out and said flat out that it's wrong. She then tried to say it wasn't about religion. She tried to claim that it's the nature of it. She said that if Poland had attacked us on 9/11, she wouldn't want a Polish memorial there. She tried pointing out that there is no Japanese memorial at Pearl Harbor.

And I might have conceeded she has a point, if it were not for two things- first, as I pointed out to her, Japan's attack on Pearl Harbor was ordered by the leader of Japan as a military attack. It was perfectly fair to blame all of Japan at the time- just as it's perfectly fair for the country of Iraq to blame all Americans- we elected the shithead who went in and screwed up their country. He was acting on our behalf- just as the leader of Japan was acting on the behalf of his country. Just as the leader of Poland would have, had it been Poland that attacked us that day. However, this was not one country attacking another. It was not even one religion attacking another. It was one small group, acting on their own, without the authority to speak for all Muslims.

The other point is that right after stating that it's not-because-of-religion-it's-because-of-insensitivity, she then said "Before anyone starts with bridge of peace, tell me how many rallies did this iman lead denouncing Islamic terrortists. Actions speak louder than words. "

My response to this was to ask how many anti-terrorism rallies she's led. Should we only allow the space to be used by those who have, or is it just Muslims who have to prove themselves (this, by the way, is what led to the whole Poland/Japan thing)?

How on earth can you claim this is not about religion, and then scorn the imam of the group for not having led anti-terrorism rallies? It's a disgusting double standard.

I have been the victim of religious discrimination. There are so many untruths about Wicca floating around- some are just basic misunderstandings, and some are outright lies. But the discrimination I've faced vastly pales in comparison to what Muslims are facing in this country right now. They are being attacked. They are being told they don't have the right to their mosques. They are the victims of arson. No one's ever tried to burn my house down (the comparison being that it's my "house of worship" for lack of a better term here).

But the worst thing she said? The thing that I can't believe would come out of her mouth? She said, "Should the current building come down for the mosque, I'll be there with pork chops!!!!"

I truly believe that she meant this in the most insulting way possible- and congratulations, R! You accomplished it. For all the horrible things that have been said about my religion, no one has ever said anything directly insulting. I've been spit on. I've been accused of being evil, and worshipping the devil (which I find amusing, as I don't believe in him). But I've never heard anything so directly pointed at someone's religious beliefs in such an insulting way. And she has the nerve to say it's not about religion.

Things You...

2010-09-06T20:29:00.000-07:00

might have heard if you were sitting in my room with me as I back up my iTunes.

"Shit! How much music do I have?"

"I have an album by Supergrass? How long have I had an album by Supergrass?"

"Who the hell is Thirteen Senses, and why do I have an album by them?...Oh, hey, this is good"

"Wow, this movie sucks. I wonder who's on Absolute" (absoluteradio.co.uk, that is)"

"Who the hell is Matt Hires... I actually bought this? Was it by accident?"

"Shit. How much money do I spent on music?"

"Do they have to play the only song by Queen I don't like?"

"Hey! I have a third Feeder album. Awesome! When did that come out?"

"I should buy less music"

"When did I replace my Candlebox album?"

"Who the hell is Sugar?... Oh, very 90s. Did I know who they were in the 90s?"

"Did I ever back up Florence and the Machine? I've had that for over a year... well, a second copy won't hurt..."

"How much money do I spend on music?"

"Oooh, Paul Weller!"

"Hey, that's right- Noel did a solo album of their stuff. I should totally listen to Morning Glory. I can't believe they broke up. How could they do that to me?"

"I should buy less music."

"I should give my burner a break. Shite, this could take days."

"Please gods, Mark Crossley, don't play that song. That song sucks."

"Wow. I was so disappointed in the new Keane."

By Popular Demand- Almond White Chocolate Unscotti Drops

2010-08-30T17:28:00.000-07:00

I've had many requests today for the cookie recipe I mentioned in my blog this morning, so I'll be nice and share. I altered this recipe so much to suit my tastes, that it barely resembles the original anymore.

This started out as a biscotti recipe- which for those who don't know, biscotti means "twice baked" in Italian, to represent the fact that they are indeed baked twice. I was looking for a recipe about five years ago that I liked, and the closest I came was an orange and dark chocolate recipe (which I'm not fond of). However, the base dough looked so simple I thought I might be able to tweak it, and make the biscotti the way I wanted it. And sure enough it worked- to some extent. See, the way it works is, you bake the biscotti once in loaves, and then you let them cool a few minutes, cut them into slices, and bake them again. Well, I got to taste testing after the first bake, and they were so yummy, they never got baked the second time. And neither did any of the subsequent batches.

Finally, after a length of time too embarassing to admit to, I finally realise I could use a cookie scoop to make them drop cookies, rather than doing the loaves and slices that have a tendancy to fall apart. It was my final modification, and now they are perfect. As I said before, this base is really basic, and you can use whatever combination you like. For instance, sometimes I use Anise extract instead of Almond (but only about half as much). You could do orange and chocolate, raspberry and chocolate, ect. Whatever you fancy.

Oh, and just a note-these cookies are very slightly on the dry side. I think you could add and extra egg for moisture without altering the consistency too much, but I've never tried it.

** the recipe has been corrected to fix a mistake I totally can't believe I made.

Almond White Chocolate Unscotti Drops

2 sticks butter, softened
1 1/2 C Granulated Sugar
4 Eggs
4 Tbs Almond Extract (use less for a weaker flavoring- this amount makes for a very strong flavor)
4 C Flour
3 tsp Baking Powder
1/2 tsp Salt
12-18 oz White Chocolate Chips
1/2 C Almonds, optional

Preheat oven to 350

Cream butter and sugar. Add eggs, beat well. Add almond extract. Add flour, baking powder and salt. Stir in chips and almonds. Drop with cookie scoop (or by rounded teaspoon) onto ungreased cookie sheets. Bake for 12-14 minutes. Cookies should not brown, except slightly on the bottom. Cool slightly and enjoy. Makes about 6 dozen 1 1/2 inch cookies (this recipe can easily be halved for fewer cookies)

Random Roundup

2010-08-30T08:06:00.000-07:00

First off, I survived my first week of school. As usual, math sucks and I love my polisci class. I have massive amounts of homework for someone only taking two classes.

I finished the monster shawl I was working on. I didn't expect to get it all done yesterday, but chart four worked faster than chart three, and chart five was only one row. It's massive, by the way. It's 45-50" unblocked. It took three hours just to bind off. I guess that's what happens when you have 1152 stitches on your needles. I love it, it's gorgeous, but I'm never knitting that pattern again. For those of you wondering what I'm talking about, or what it looks like, click here.

I'll be starting another Dancing Crane KAL on Wednesday. I'm really looking forward to it. It is a lovely, easy pattern, that will probably make up for the frustration of the Artemis. I'll be adjusting my size on this one, so it fits me, and I don't end up giving it away.

Silver is working on an amazing steampunk Princess Peach dress. I wish I had that kind of talent. One of these days, I'll have to work more on my sewing.

I woke up with this overwhelming urge to listen to Scouting For Girls. They are pure Britpop perfection. Awesome driving music. It's just funny, because I usually wake up with the urge to listen to 90's Britpop. Or 90's rock. Or just about anything from the 90's before boybands and poptarts took over (the exception to this is Take That, who's recent albums are strangely awesome).

We have ants in our kitchen. We also have no idea where they are coming from. I hate bug spray.

I ate cookies for breakfast Saturday. A whole lotta cookies. I will be eating oatmeal and fish all week to make up for it. But they were my famous Almond White Chocolate unscotti drops, so it was totally worth it.

Some People Just Need To Learn When To Stop Talking

2010-08-27T12:07:00.000-07:00

** Slightly Political

Now, I don't think it will come as any big surprise to know who know both me and who Glenn Beck is that I pretty much can't stand the guy. For those who don't know, Glenn Beck is a conservative political commentator on Fox News (a conservative "news" network). My issues with him are not entirely based on his political views (although I do have big issues with his views). A large part of my problem with him is that he will say one thing when speaking out against something he doesn't believe in, and then do the exact same thing in support of something he does, making a hypocrite of himself. He seems to think it's perfectly acceptable to go back and forth on a position, as long as it suits his message of the day.

But right now, I would pay money if he would just shut up. Now, I'm not advocating censorship here- I never advocate censorship. But I do believe some people just don't need a damn forum. And if they do have a forum, they need to have the good sense to know when to stop talking. Unfortunately, Glenn Beck has too much of the former, and seemingly none of the latter.

See, Mr. Beck is holding some sort of rally this weekend. Tomorrow, to be exact. At the Lincoln memorial, on the anniversary of Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr's "I Have A Dream Speech". I'm not really sure what he's going to do or hoping to accomplish, because for all that the man talks, he never really seems to say anything. But the one thing he keeps making very clear is how he believes he's going to "make history". Over and over, amid all his talk of spiritualism and conservative values, he keeps reiterating about the history he's going to make. He's compared it to the flag raising at Iwo Jima, and the civil rights movement, among other things.

Newsflash, Beckhead. Nobody ever made history by declaring that they were going to make history. History is made when people aren't looking. Something magical happens when a number of things come together. Look at Woodstock. Look at Stonewall. Look at Dr. King's rally 47 years ago. No one thought these things would make history. No one went around planning things that people would talk about for decades. They were just living in the moment, doing what they felt needed to be done- whether that was a concert that spiraled to unforgettable proportions, riots against unfair police actions, or a man fighting for equal rights. Yes, the one thing they have in common is the fact that they are truly historical events. But they didn't get that way by trying to force the issue.

I Am Horrified... and Utterly Dissappointed

2010-08-24T17:32:00.000-07:00

So for those of you who know me well, it will not surprise you that I have strong political opinions. And now I think it's only fair to warn you and everyone else that politics is about to play a big role in my blog. I'm back in school now, taking a civil rights class (I am a political science major), it's an election year, and people in politics are acting like fucktards. I understand if anyone wants to skip these posts. I won't take it personally. I'll even put a warning up at the top of the post that it's political (as often as I remember to).

What's been eating at me for several days now is this so-called Ground Zero mosque. Just to inform anyone living under a rock with no access to radios, televions, or another human being capable of communications, here's the deal: a group of Muslims want to build a community center in an abandoned building three blocks from where the World Trade Center used to stand. It is not a mosque, despite what the alarmists would like everyone to think. It's a community center, which would include a basketball court and a cooking school. Sounds like the makings of a diabolical plan to me.

My problem here is this: Who fucking cares whether it's a mosque, a community center, or a secret canasta club? Muslims are being discriminated against, and maligned in the media every time I turn around. The things I have heard some of these politicans and politcal commentators say have been horrendous. One even went so far as to say something along the lines of "Muslims everywhere rejoiced as the planes hit the towers". This is bullshit.

Muslims are generally peaceful people. Most of them do not advocate or condone violence. Islamic extremests were the ones behind the attacks. They were the ones rejoices as our landmarks fell. To say that all Muslims supported or were responsible for the attacks is the same as saying that all Christians are responsible for every abortion clinic bombing. It's ridiculous, and an outright lie.

This country was founded on religous freedom. It is, in indisputable fact, the very reason this country was founded. And now so many Americans who have the right to worship their god in whatever way they choose, are doing their damndest to take that right from others.

In Kentucky, the goverment just pulled the licensing of a mosque that had already been granted permission to build. Their official reason? A neighboring business said he was concerned that they would block his business with their parking. When asked what he would say if it had been a christian church going in next door, he said that he would think they would park in a way that didn't obstruct his business. So apparently, all Muslims are inconsiderate bastards who can't park legally and will kill your business? This kind of blatant discrimination makes me sick. I hope they sue.

It's like this repeated crap that President Obama is Muslim. He's not. He is Christian. But really, what does it matter? We live in a country where the very first amendment in the Bill of Rights says that "Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof..." It is called the Free Exercise clause. It's one of my favorites. It's the one that gives me the right to openly practice Wicca. It allows Baptists, and Penecostals, and Jehova Witnesses, and Mormons, and Catholics and all those other branches of Christianity that I've forgotten the right to worship in a way that is not mandated by the Church of England. And whether they like it or not, it gives Muslims the same right. And that includes a community center/mosque/canasta club, three blocks away from ground zero.

Randomness

2010-08-17T22:36:00.000-07:00

First off, yes, my a/c has been fixed. It broke Thursday morning, and we had a new one by late Friday. It was awful, but we survived. The new one is much quieter, and is cooling the house much better. They say it should help bring our electric bill down. We're not holding our breath on that one.

It's raining. That makes me happy.

I have a favorite new snack- Sahale Nuts. Specifically, the cashews with pomegranate and honey. They also have vanilla and apple in them, and they are spectacular. I have to limit how often I can buy them. I eat the whole (albeit small) bag in one sitting.

I also won the $25 gift certificate from my LYS this month, thus allowing me to replace my size 6 and 7 needles. This makes me even happier than the rain.

I am continuing my one-woman crusade to bring the brilliance of I Am Kloot to the world. It's slow going. For those not in the know, I Am Kloot is a band. A truly fantastic trio from the UK. They write clever, witty, catching songs. Someone once said they were "twisted torch songs", and they were not wrong. Check them out at iTunes (sorry, I'm too lazy to link for you). I love them so much, I imported their new album from amazon uk because it wasn't availible here (okay, so I do that with all the british bands I love- and there are many- although none so much as Kloot).

It's still raining. I'm still happy.

I'm being plagued by my current knitting project. It's a very simple project, and should not be the source of this much drama. It's from "Victorian Lace Today", and it was supposed to be my first shawl with a knit-on border- and it started going wrong from the get go. First, I had to do cast on four or five times. It called for a provisional cast on, which I'd never done before, and managed to screw up many times. I finally got it right, and started knitting the diamond center. I got about a third of the way through, only to realise I was not going to have enough yarn. Unfortunately, buying more yarn is not an option right now ($6500 a/c unit, you see), so I decided to rip out, and start again just doing the diamond center. I got about six repeats in, when I realised I hadn't made it wide enough. So I ripped back and started again, only this time, I decided to do more repeats across and fewer repeats up so that the pattern actually shows in the right direction when I wear it. But this makes about the seventh cast on. Fortunately, the pattern is so easy I've already memorized it, and it's pretty brainless to work. However, if for any reason whatsoever, I have to rip out again... I'm done. No more. I will very possibly burn the pattern.

I made three more pair of earrings- now if I could just figure out how to get them to photograph, damn it.

I've lost a few more pounds, and my pants fit again. Hallelujah. I've started doing kickboxing on my good pain days, because my old workout no longer challenged me.

So that's about it for now, but I'll be back in a bit for a lightning round of book reviews- I'm just making sure I have all the titles and authors correct (I did a lot of reading when the air was down- I couldn't stand the extra heat from the yarn to knit).

110 Degrees

2010-08-12T23:15:00.000-07:00

Yes, boys and girls- it was indeed 110 degrees outside today. Perhaps you are wondering why I'm bringing this up? Only because my air conditioning broke this morning, and I'm now marinating in my own sweat. Yeah, there's a rant coming.

Our a/c isn't really all that old, a mere three years. And even in the harsh summer conditions of Arizona, an a/c unit should last longer. So it became very clear that something was rotten in the state of Denmark (err, Arizona). Perhaps I should start at the beginning...

I was partaking of a strategic rest this morning (e.g. :I fell asleep while reading), when I woke up to this very unpleasant burning smell. I roused myself, and went to make sure the 'rents weren't burning down the house. I found the female 'rent already on the phone with the repair man. Apparently, while I was involved in the aforementioned resting, the a/c kicked on, making this gods-awful noise, and said burning smell commenced, thus concerning the 'rents.

The very nice repair company had someone here in less than 20 minutes. They get points for excellent reponse time, and further points for sending someone super hot. Anyway, he had me turn the air back on (we had turned it off upon agreement of not wanting out house to burn down), and I got to experience the gods-awful sound first hand. It was lovely- the way that a gaggle of geese honking in unison is lovely (that is to say- hardly at all). He had me cut the power pretty much immediately. He just needed to know what kind of sound it was. Apparently, air conditioners are very similar to cars that way, and they speak a strange language that only trained and certified repairmen speak, because he knew immediately what was wrong. It was fairly impressive.

It turns out that the company who installed our a/c (not our choice, by the way) installed a five ton compressor with a four ton coil unit. Apparently, this is akin to trying to put ten pounds of flour into a five pound sack (or so the very attractive repairman told me). This imbalance led to the coil motor burning out. It's also apparently the reason my bedroom gets really hot, my workout room gets really cold, and the electric bill goes through the roof during the summer. There is no way to fix this- they must replace the entire unit with one that has equal whatevers.

Fortunately, they are able to install it tomorrow. Unfortunately, it will take most of the day, and we've had no air since 11:00 am. The fans we have are doing a pitiful job. I'm walking around with a wet washcloth on my head, in order to keep the headaches at bay (it's unspeakably attractive, let me assure you- kind of like a cross between an elf's hat and a nun's wimple), and continually spraying myself down water. I'm also drinking more water than I ever have before- and promptly sweating it all out. My parent's got a portable a/c unit in their room, but my room was "too big", so I don't have one. I hate them, just a little right now.

I also hate Arizona. Just thought I'd remind everyone. In the meantime, I'm mostly sticking to reading, and staying off the computer, because my laptop is overheating without the a/c. So I'll be back after we have air again, with some book reviews, including the two I wrote that got lost in the saving snafu.

I'm also thinking about working on my book tomorrow- long hand. Very old school style. I don't think I've done that since grade schoo.

Judge Vaughn Walker, you are my new hero!

2010-08-04T19:05:00.000-07:00

Yesterday, Josh Lanyon was my favorite man in the world, for reasons that should be fairly obvious. He writes fantastic mysteries, featuring fantastic gay heroes. He's also an openly gay writer, and that's pretty brave. Yet today, another man has (at least temporarily) usurped his position- and I don't believe Josh will mind.

Judge Vaughn Walker today ruled that Proposition 8- the proposition in California that banned gay marriage-was unconstitutional, and overturned it. He stood up for the citizens of California, and for gays and lesbians everywhere. Because the simple truth is that prop 8 violates the 14th amendment of the United States- and he flat out said so. He didn't mince words, and he didn't pull punches. I don't know what he looks like, but I'd totally make out with him right now.

This is by no means a done deal. The supporters of prop 8 have already vowed to appeal. But there is a very good chance that this will go before the US Supreme Court now (though it could go before the California Supreme Court first), and force a federal decision. This is very good news, as it is extremely unlikely the US Supreme Court would vote in favor of the ban (I could go on about why, but you all might get bored).

Anyway, this is fantastic news, and a truly fantastic victory. I do not live in CA at the moment (I was born there), but as a bisexual woman I appreciate any advancement in gay rights. And as someone with friends whose marriage has been put in question, it means a lot that someone stood up for people like Karen and Jules.

Randomness

2010-07-31T01:10:00.000-07:00

So I didn't really have one particular thing on my mind tonight: I had several. Rather than do many unrealted posts, I'm throwing them all together.

***
So, first off- I promise I really did write those book reviews. But either Blogger doesn't save posts the same way Livejournal did, or I'm a complete idiot who can't figure out basic instructions (a far more likely scenario). I spent two hours writing those up the other night, and then... nothing. They are nowhere. I'll have to do them again tomorrow.
***
So a couple weeks ago, I was stunned to discover I had put another 10 pounds back on. Five of it I could account for (mom and dad birthday week- it was bad), but five of it I could not. So I started a food journal to keep track of what I was eating. I don't count calories or anything, I just write down everything I eat each day. It's been very effective, and I've lost eight pounds already. My pants fit again, so that's a really big plus (they were tight for a few days there). I'm going to keep up with it, since it seems to be the key. Not only does it tell me when I'm eating too much, it's also a great way to keep track of my fruits, veg and whole grains.

***
I had to replace my size 8 circular needles, so I went a ran to my LYS. And boy, do my ladies there know me well. Darles talked me into trying the Addi lace, since they know that's what I primarily knit. I wasn't sure at first, not only because of the price ($16.95), but also because I find aluminum needles to be very slippery. But I started my new knitting project with them today, and hot damn! those babies are awesome. When I have the money, I will slowly replace the needles I use most frequently with those.

***
I had more of the runaround from the finaid department, leaving me stressed, and very angry. Anger is not one of my dominant emotions, so I don't cope with it very well. Finally, out of nowhere, I remembered a simple anger releasing ritual a friend told me about years ago. It's very easy to throw together, and doesn't require a lot of energy (which is good, becuase I was just about out). All it takes is a candle, a carving tool (I used a screwdriver, as it was what I had handy), and a lighter. Here's what you do:

Take the candle, and write the name of whatever is causing the anger (in my case, the school). I just used an all-purpose white taper (I only have white candles right now).

Hold the candle, focus on your anger, and direct in to the candle.

Say a simple blessing; you can just make it up as you go along. I asked Isis for help in releasing the anger, and thanked her for her help. It can be as specific as you feel it needs to be. Then, light the candle and let it burn down completely, until it's spent, and puts itself out. Once it's cool enough to handle, wrap the remains of the wax in a scrap of cloth (or something else that works for you), making sure to get all the wax remnants. Then, either bury it outside, or discard it in the trash (just not the trash inside your house).

I don't know where my friend came across this (we lost touch several years ago), but it works wonderfully. I've felt much better, and it didn't even require much effort.

***

So I'll be back to redo those book reviews. For now, I'm off to clean the kitchen (joy! oh joy!)

Still in pain

2010-07-28T00:30:00.000-07:00

I'm trying to find a way to deal with this monstrous pain that doesn't involve pharmaceuticals, but nothing much is working for any length of time. I've found that a very light workout does mostly kill the pain for a few hours, so long as the a/c doesn't hit me and I turn off the overhead fan. It also has to be at basically zero resistance, and I can't do it for more than about 45 minutes. I'm going to try it for 30 minutes tomorrow, and see if it has the same effect (I tried going over today, and the pain came back). If it does, then I'll at least be able to keep some of the pain at bay once school starts by exercising before class in the morning.

On the plus side, I did get some reading done, so I've decided to post some book review- something I used to be well known for, but have neglected lately. That happened when I went back to school, and ceased having time to read. However, I've had the whole summer, and I'm out of excuses. I've read several books in the past few weeks (mostly because there was an incident where my kitty chewed a hole in my shawl, and I lost my will to knit for a while). So I think I'll jump back in with a double header- one book I loved, one book I hated (the two most recent I read).

In other reading news, I'm reading this absolutely fascinating book on Wicca by Raven Grimassi, called Spirit Of The Witch. It's about what it really means to be a witch. I'm only a little ways into it, but so far, it has this fantastic historical background on a lot of things, like how pagan holidays were turned into Christian ones, and the reasons behind it. I can't review it yet, as I haven't finished it, but so far, I love it and would recommend it.

I'm still working on the plans for the indoor herb garden. I think I need to find some books on the subject. I'm good with books. Give me a few hours and a library, and I could teach myself to wire a house.

So stay tuned for those book reviews. I promise to write them now since I'm still up.

A little past the witching hour...

2010-07-23T02:08:00.000-07:00

Okay, so it's two in the morning. Normally, I like two in the morning. I'm a nocturnal creature by nature, forced into other habits by outside forces (damn college and their damn college hours!). But I'm exhausted. I had to get up early to run my errands before I had to take my dad to the doctor. Then I had to take dad to said doctor appointment. In the midst of all this, I sort of forgot to eat... for like, 8 hours. So I was running on fumes to begin with. I'd really like to be sleeping now, but I'm having a really bad pain week, and it's difficult to sleep. On the plus side, I haven't maimed myself yet this week.

So I'm knitting, and reading a little, and watching re-runs of Charmed, because it makes good knitting background noise. Plus, they just started season 4 on TNT, and I haven't seen season 4 in years, on account of lending it to Smallfry, and she never returned it. We're now time-sharing the series, and she currently has custody.

In other news, I'm trying very hard to figure out how to grow an indoor herb garden. I use a lot of herbs, between cooking stuff, and Wiccy stuff, and those lotions and potions I'm so fond of. So it's expensive to keep buying herbs when I want them fresh. I don't want to grow them in the flower bed, as it's constantly being overrun with crabgrass (I forget to weed during the school year). I don't want to grow it on the back porch, because I tend to forget to water them (learned that lesson the hard way with the lillies). So that leaves indoors. But the kittehs pose a problem. Squeaky Toy likes to chew on plants. Which means growing them somewhere other than the island counter, where all the sunlight comes in. Which means grow lights. And possibly wire mesh to keep her out of it. I figure with a lot more thinking, I'll come up with a workable plan by, oh... the end of the year.

Random thoughts and observations for the day:

2010-07-14T14:57:00.000-07:00

I have two more cuts on my fingers. Opening back-to-school supplies is far more dangerous than society lets on. I'm afraid to touch anything else- I might hemmorhage to death. Dinner will have to be microwavable. I'm not touching kitchen knives.

I found these fantastic little dessert pastry thingies at my local farmer's market called rugalah. They had apple pieces in them. They're very small (about two bites each), and lowish in calories, so they don't stray too far off the menu. CJ likey.

I've declared it Doctor Who week. So far, I'm the only person participating, but I'm hoping it will catch on. I only started watching because of Christopher. I'd watch him read a phone book. I was sad when he left, but David Tennant made up for it. Still not fond of Matt Smith, however. And if you don't know what I'm talking about, well... your world is probably a cold, dark, lonely place.

BBC America's programming mostly sucks these days. I spend a small fortune importing all the good shows from Amazon UK.

I spent the morning running errands for two hours. The best part was the driving, where I got to listen to Athlete and Embrace. Vehicles And Animals is one of my happy albums. If you don't know who I'm talking about, well, I'm sorry, but your musical education is sadly lacking.

Susie over at Useless Beauty did the Race For Life. Very, very cool. We don't do that here for a few months, on account of the debilitating heat.

Speaking of debilitating heat- I hate Arizona. I hate triple-digit temperatures with a passion. And it never rains. If I could afford out of state tuition and there was someone else to take care of my parents, I'd leave. If I had my choice, I'd be in England. Barring that, at least someplace where it rarely get above 80 and rains a hell of a lot.

For Your Continuing Amusement

2010-07-11T09:33:00.000-07:00

I offer yet another installment of the "Continuing Misadventures of Westerleigh Campbell Josephine MacGregor" or "The Point And Laugh Chronicles". (and yes, that *will* be the title of my autobiography)

The injury-and-hemmorhaging gremlin decided to come visit me again. I don't even have words for how true this is.

First, the other week, there was the small-but-significant "guacamole related sour cream incident". It involved me, slicing my finger open on the lid to the sour cream, whilst I was making guacamole (yes, the name was that self-explanatory). Then came the "my kitty tried to use me as a step ladder" incident, in which Buggie tried to climb up to the back of my chair by using my arm to boost himself up. I have five beautiful, two inch gashes on my arm.

Then came last night, where my little kitten Squeaky Toy- aka The Pinball Wizard- decided to use my foot as a launching pad for said pinball wizardry. I have a three inch gash on my big toe that bled a lot and is remarkably painful.

Then came the grocery store today, not one hour ago, where I somehow managed to rip my knuckles open on the shipping cart. As expected, it bled a lot, and was painful.

Such are the things that make up my life.

Finding it hard...

2010-07-09T00:09:00.000-07:00

Hard to maintain my zen-like calm, as I continue to deal with my school's finaid office. They admitted that I never signed the stipulation agreement, and that they released my financial aid for last semester without it, and that they did not send me any correspondence in the last two years regarding said stipulations. But are they willing to give me my loans? No, under the argument that I knew the stipulations existed two years ago, ergo, I'm bound by them. It's now being handed over to the director of Finaid, and I won't hear anything until sometime next week. I've dropped two of my classes preemptively, because if I can convince them to give me my loans back, they will most likely apply to stipulations to the fall semester, and I won't take any chances. If not, I can't afford more than two classes, anyways.

It's all very exhausting, and not good for my stress level or mental health. Since my arm decided to quit throbbing today, I've decided I'm spending the next three days curled up in my room knitting. Possibly reading some more. I'm really trying to gather my thoughts so I can post some reviews. On the plus side, I'll have lots of time for knitting even after the semester starts, so I don't have to rush them for the next six weeks. I might actually get all my projects done by the end of the year (don't look at me like that- I have lots of projects cued).

For now, I'm going to go crawl into bed. I'm wiped out, and need some major sleep.

There Is A Conspiracy Afoot

2010-07-06T22:12:00.000-07:00

A conspiracy to keep me from knitting. This may sound melodramatic, but I swear it's true. First, there's the guacamole-related sour cream incident, which entailed my bandaid-clad finger being useless for days. And right on the heels of that demoralising incident comes the "my kitty tried to use me as a step ladder" incident.

Yup. My handsome little Buggie decided that he absolutely *had* to get up on the back of my desk chair that I was sitting in. And he clearly decided that the best way to get there was to use my arm as... you guess it, a step ladder. I now have five gorgeous two inch gashes running down my arm and landing firmly in the crook of my elbow- located with perfect percision for maximum pain. Thank you, Purr Monster. Without this, I might have actually finished Sej's shawl by the end of the week.

Warning!!! Rant Ahead!!! (Danger! Danger Will Robinson!)

2010-07-01T21:49:00.000-07:00

My school financial aid department has their head so far up their ass they are about to be dissolved by their own stomache acids.

So here's the story, for those of you not in the know. I put off college for a few years when I turned 18. I had a job, and wanted to work instead. I wasn't big on college at the time. I was suffering from massive inferiority complexes, based on my uber-smart middle sister, and the fact that I had dropped out of school in 8th grade. So when I was 21 and found myself unemployed, I decided to try school. This was also around the time my dad was getting really sick. So I was trying to go to school and take care of my dad at the same time. It wasn't working too well. I kept missing more days than I made, and it was hard to keep up with my homework. I ended up dropping out halfway through my first semester. The school made me petition for finaid, approved me, and I completed my second semester, by the skin of my teeth. Unfortunately, dad was getting worse, we didn't know what was wrong with him, and so we had a repeat of the first semester. So I had to petition again. They were kind enough to give me another try, so this time I decided to try open entry/open exit classes. For those unfamiliar with this, these are online classes you do at your own pace. However, there was a really big misunderstanding, where apparently, the first assignment had to be done within the first two weeks- which I was not told, so they didn't get done in time, and I was dropped from the classes. So after this, I decided to take some time off from school. Obviously, it wasn't going well, and I needed to re-evaluate.

This was about the same time my mom asked me not to look for a job, and to stay home and take care of my dad full time, while the doctors tried to figure out what was wrong with him. It was a little boring, but it was better than nothing. Little did we know it was going to take another three years to figure it all out. This is where my whole life went completely off track, in case you were all wondering.

So anyway, we finally know what's wrong with dad (to some extent- we don't know it all), and they are treating him the best they can. So in fall of 2008, I was going to try going to school again. So I did all my paperwork, and finaid let me petition one last time. They approved me, but with stipulations. "What stipulations?" I hear you ask? Well, that's the thing- I don't know. Dad ended up having to have surgery, so I put school off for another year. I never went in to sign the paperwork. I was going to start in fall of 09, but that's when mom had her leg amputated, so I put it off another semester. So fast forward to this January.

I enroll, I'm approved, finaid says everything is good to go. No petition, nothing to sign. I was told it had been long enough that they just had to let me attend. I originally registered for 9 credit hours- but a couple of weeks into the semester, math is kicking my ass hard enough that I dropped my elective, so I would have more time for my actual classes needed for my degree. I work my ass off, and not only passed my classes, but passed with a motherfucking 4.0 GPA. I aced all three of my finals. This is pretty astonishing for anyone, but especially for me, as I had a really bad semester. My mom ended up in the hospital with sepsis and almost died, dad's been systematically getting worse the past few months, I was in a car accident and got a bad case of whiplash, and my grandfather was killed by a drunk driver. And I managed to overcome all of that and not only make it through, but make it through with truly excellent grades.

So what's the problem, you might be asking yourselves? Has she just completely lost it, and is now railing against her school for no reason? No, I assure you not. I just happened to check my student email this evening, where I was informed of a message from finaid. So I go and check my student page. Lo and behold, there is a message saying that I won't be getting financial aid for fall, because- wait for it-.... I didn't meet satisfactory academic progress!! Yeah, you heard me. I completed 6 credit hours with a 4.0 GPA, and they're saying I didn't meet their standards.

So naturally, I'm assuming there is some sort of mistake, so I call the school to get it straightened out. After all, it's about time to start sending in my loan paperwork. And a very lovely woman named Lupita checks my file, and sure enough, they've pulled my aid. The reason? The elective I dropped.

Now, here's the thing. According to school policy, you qualify for financial aid so long as you are enrolled at least half time (6 credit hours) and maintain a GPA of 2.0 or better. So I totally qualify, right? Even with the class I dropped, I still had six credits. Well, remember those stipulations I mentioned earlier? Well, the school is saying I didn't meet them, because I didn't complete *all* the classes I attempted (remember, I dropped the class two weeks into the semester). But here's the thing: I never agreed to the stipulations. I never went in and signed the damn agreement. Lupita went and looked through my records, and sure enough, couldn't find the petition at all. But that wasn't enough for them. No, they won't release my account until they check again, and she talks to a supervisor. Well, she's not the only one who's going to be talking to a supervisor, I can assure you. She took my name and phone number, and promised to call me back on Tuesday. I'll be following up if she doesn't.

I'm obviously not giving up without a fight. I'm royally pissed about this, for so many reasons. First, I never signed the damn agreement. I will not be held to something I didn't agree to. Second, I worked my ass off for those grades, I really don't feel I should be punished for dropping an elective. And third- it's been five fucking years!!! Five years since I attempted classes that I didn't finish. At some point, you need to just stop holding it against someone (which is what I was told at the beginning of the semester). And now I have to wait until Tuesday to get anything else done, because they are closed until then.

And I was having such a lovely week...

For your further amusement

2010-06-28T23:53:00.000-07:00

I offer another edition of the "Continuing Misadventures of W.C.J.M" aka "The Point and Laugh Chronicles".

So I was very busy today, from the time I got up. It was all go, go, go (for the record, I'm not a big fan of "go,go,go", or in fact, of "go" in general). There were grocery stores (a seeming multitude of them), post offices, tire shops, and doctors appointments. I barely had fifteen minutes in between to drink water and hit the ladie's room. And then we got stuck at dad's pain doctor. So I ended up going waaaaay too long without eating.

This would be the downside to being germophobic with a healthy dash of obsessive compulsive. Normal people- of which I am not one- would just be able to grab a sandwich, or french fries, or something from a vending machine. But I can't eat anything without washing my hands really, really well, and I'm not really good at eating things other people have handled. So before I knew it, it was four thirty in the afternoon and I was just having breakfast (if you count breakfast as the first meal of the day, and not by what time you're eating- in which case I was having one hell of a late lunch).

So I was throwing together a turkey and avocado sandwich with some baked tortilla chips on the side. Since I had a lot of extra avocado, I decided to make guacamole. And I always thin my guac out with just a little bit of light sour cream. And as I go to open the sour cream, I- wait for it.... slice my finger open trying to pry off the lid. It was painful, and bleeding profusely. It was like a paper cut, but with plastic. It was a plastic cut.

I really wish I could tell you all that I make this shit up just to provide you all with boundless entertainment, but sadly, these are the things that really happen to me. And apparently, only happen to me. Because really, who else do you all know who could slice their fingers with the lid to a sour cream carton?

So now my finger's all bandaged, and I'm off my knitting for a couple days. Poor Sej. Poor Sej's shawl. It probably feels abandoned. On the plus side, I'm taking advantage of this hiatus to finish up my Gay Pride Week Marathon of Movies and Television- during which I watch all the GLBT movies and tv shows I own (of which there are many). I now have a new movie in the top five, called Mulligans. It's smart and a little sexy, without being cheesy or having a cliched, schmaltzy ending that usually comes with these kind of movies. I highly recommend it. And now that I've finished The Lair and Dante's Cove, I'm working my way through Noah's ARC. I'm hoping my finger will feel better tomorrow, and I can knit. But if not, I still have The Big Gay Musical.

Quote of the day: "You really shouldn't bury your friends alive, Colin"- The Lair.

For Your Amusement

2010-06-23T23:35:00.000-07:00

"The Continuing Misadventures of Westerleigh Campbell Josephine MacGregor" or "The Point And Laugh Chronicles" (my apologies to anyone who read this on the board)

So I had to take my mommy to the doctor today. It was early, and I was tired, mostly due to the fact that I didn't go to bed until 6:00 am and had to get up at 9:00 am. I was a little fuzzy in the brain.

Well, my mommy has a new chairlift in the van, and a nifty little electric wheelchair to go with it. This makes taking her places much, much easier than it makes taking dad. So anyways, we go, see the doctor, and all is well. Then we decided to stop at the store on the way home for a few things. We stop, and all is well. Until we go to leave the store.

So I go to load the groceries in the back of the van, and as I try to shift the seats, I realise something is in my way. So I go around to the side door and find the problem is that the leg rests for my dad's wheelchair are in the way. So I ask mom to start moving the lift out of the way, and move the legs. Then I go to put the groceries in the back, so I can load her chair in. And then she tells me the lift won't work.

Yep, all of a sudden, it stops working as she's trying to get it all the way out of the car. So I'm checking all the connections, and nothing's working. Fortunately, mom knows the number for the company who installed it, so she grabs my mobile and calls them. The poor guy who answers isn't our normal guy (we usually deal directly with a manager, but he's hard to get a hold of, and this was a little important, so we took whoever we could get), so he's not quite sure what model we have. But he's telling me to look underneath the lift motor for an on/off switch, to check three different type of connectors, and to click these little buttons on the lift. It was all very confusing. I couldn't find the on/off switch, the connectors seemed find, and the little clicky buttons didn't do anything (I also had my mom check the battery on the car, and it was fine).

So he tells me he's going to call the manager, takes my phone number, and says he'll call me back. My mom and I are stranded at the store. She wants me to drive home and put the groceries away, but the arm of the lift was just far enough out that I couldn't close the side door. I also didn't like the thought of leaving her there with no sure way to get her home- we weren't sure if the battery on the chair would last long enough for her to get the few miles home, and it was already over 100 degrees outside. So I was quite concerned, to say the least. On the plus side, a couple of the clerks I know quite well at the store, saw that we were still there, came out to check on us, and offered to refrigerate our cold stuff if we had to wait for help. Wasn't that nice of them?

So the manager, Mark, calls me back, and he's already on his way, but he wants me to check something for him- he knows where the on/off switch is, tells me where to find it, and wants me to check on it. It's right there, on the side of the motor that faces... you guessed it- the door! Ergo, it was staring me right in the face. And guess what else? Yup, right again. It was turned off. Remember that part where I mentioned leaning in to move the wheelchair legs?...

Yup. I accidentally turned it off when I was moving those out of the way. I accidentally hit the switch that I didn't know was there...with my boobs. With my so-big-they-need-their-own-zip-code boobs. Because that's what happens to me. I move things with my tits. My friend L thinks I should put it on my resume/CV- "Can operate machinery with breasts". She might be on to something.

Obviously, after that, we were all fine, and got home safe and sound... well, except for my pride, which has been hemorrhaging most of the day. I fed it some cookies. It just might recover.

I forgot it was the solstice

2010-06-21T21:24:00.000-07:00

For those of you not in the know, any solstice is a pretty major holiday for us Wiccan/Pagans. I never forgotten a solstice before, and I've been Wiccan since I was 14. I quite simply forgot, as I fell into bed at 9:45 last night- which is another embarrassment in and of itself. I'm only 28 and I'm on summer break. To be in bed before ten, let alone before three in the morning? Well, frankly, it's demoralizing.
I take this as a sign that I'm overworked. Yes, I went on a short strike last week, and extended it today, but it's clearly not enough. I seem to be in a perpetual state of exhaustion. I'm taking the folks to three or four doctor appointments a week- and have been since classes got out. I'm not sure my strike had the intended effect. I woke up this morning still tired, and with a low-grade throbbing headache, that lasted most of the day, including after I took a nap (I also learned that I no longer like naps- I don't feel any better after taking them). I can't find my hematite pendant anywhere, and I'm out of all my natural remedies- oils, creams, poultices and teas-, so I finally had to breakdown and take some painkillers.

So anyways, I'm going to do my solstice ritual just a little late. I usually do it at midnight, so it's the start of the day. I'll be doing it tonight at the end of the day. I'd like the think the Gods won't mind- that they'd rather I be a little late than risk setting something on fire because I'm too tried to mind the candles.

In other news, I finally got started on Sej's shawl. Not much progress yet, as I decided to read first instead. I'm trying to balance the whole reading/knitting thing. I'd also like to get some writing done, but I've been too busy to get any real work done. At this rate, I may graduate law school before poor Sej sees a complete draft. On the plus side, I've gotten four shawls knit, and several books read. I've also been enjoying my World Cup games, alternated with episodes of West Wing. I'm hoping to remember to post some book review soon. I also have hopes of seeing a couple of movies soon.

But I'm not holding my breath.

Current Music: Cabron- The Red Hot Chili Peppers

For Nix

2010-06-09T22:51:00.000-07:00

Now please, for the love of Isis, stop texting me at five in the morning. The only reason I want to be awake at five in the morning is because I haven't gone to bed yet. *Not* because my crazy gay boyfriend wants to read a poem. It's "Bleed, pt 2", and yes, like parts 1, 3, and 4, it's about the Boy. Yes, it's angry. And yes, it's where the tattoo on my forearm came from.

Bleed pt. 2

You were my elusive dream
I’ll always wonder what that means
Never know but always try
To find the different reasons why
You should have stayed but I let go
Now we’re both on our own
A lesson learned- the view from the shelf
You never wanted me for yourself
I found the void but never the hope
It was never in my scope
The drugs didn’t work, but they changed
I swear we liked it, being strange
Walking away, coming along
Could you feel it coming on strong?
Crossing lines, taking crimes
Always tripping over dimes
Lose the time as I lose my mind
Killing myself, I’m exactly the kind
Meet old lovers, greet their mothers
There’s always more room under your covers
Say goodnight, you hate the sight
Block your eyes from the light
Goodnight to you, good-bye my love
Falling apart is a powerful shove
Stand, trip, fall, bleed
Did you forget how to plead?
Find her door, feel the lock
A change in structure is always a shock
Feel yourself start to grow weak
It all goes down on a losing streak
A great view from here as you start to sink
You’re trying to crawl back from the brink
It passed us by, another decade
Disappointment has the sharpest blade
Taste the failure- the popularity poll
A soul like yours is never whole
Telling a lie is what you want
The hunger you feel has left you gaunt
I’ll feel you crack, I’ll watch you cry
I’ll see you break, I’ll hear you sigh
Almost died for you, you took me down that low
But you’ll never realise all I’ve come to know
Chasing Amy, losing at love
But losing yourself is nothing to be proud of
Do you know how to fix this mess?
What does the devil do when she’s restless?
Story-weaver, you’re just what they need
Telling them lies is your only good deed
Can you feel it when they’re weeping?
Do you miss them as you’re sleeping?
Push, pull, grab, rub
You’re breaking inside, join the club
Feel the tears pool in your eyes
Feeling anything is such a surprise
What is it that makes you wild?
What makes you a demon-child?
I know what it is and I know how
And I’m gonna do it until you bow
I’ll drive you home, tease a bit
Then you know I’m gonna split
Kiss my feet, dive inside
I'm never going to let you hide

Let the festivities begin!

2010-06-09T22:40:00.000-07:00

Upon my realisation that the World Cup starts on Saturday, I decided to jump start my Annual Summer West Wing Festival Extravaganza. I was having a rough couple of days anyways, and Bradley Whitford cheers me up to no end. So it's a win/win.
I was going to make cookies today, but never quite got to it. I did get my next shawl started, and am also looking through my patterns for what I want to make for Sej. So tomorrow I'm going to make said cookies, and swatch said project (once I choose which one- I've got a short list). There will probably be awesomely bad 90's music involved (I never bake without listening to music). I'm going to make my white chocolate chip unscotti (which is biscotti, only baked once instead of twice so it's softer), and the Oatmeal Butterscotch cookies that Cranky Otter recommended. I'm going to freeze half the dough so I don't eat too many cookies.

And then I will go back to Bradley, and my knitting. And I will be happy. I hope everyone has something that makes them as happy as West Wing makes me.

And I will be posting another poem, because Nix has begun bombarding me with phone calls and emails. And the occasional text message at inappropriate hours of the night!

Surfacing...

2010-06-07T11:50:00.000-07:00

If only for a moment. I finished my KAL in record time. It came out beautiful, if I do say so myself. The pattern is quick, easy and beautiful. It's gone in my favorites pile, and I'm sure will be knit up quite frequently in different colors. I'm going to take a day or so to read a bit more, and swatch for my next project. After that, I'll cast on and start knitting away some more.

In other news (directly related to the amount of knitting I've been doing), I had a very sucessful week in not smoking. I quit on 5/31, and didn't start losing my mind until last night- somehow I managed not to run down to the convience store a block away and buy cigarettes. I'm just trying to remember why I decided to quit smoking. Anyone know?

Anyway, here are some pictures of my lovely new shawl- which I'm thinking of giving away, if anyone wants it.